January 30 09

So, she tagged me for the 25 random thing meme that’s spreading like SARS in Toronto circa 2003 floating around facebook. and since SHE has totally rad taste in music (and this, as you all know, music snob that i am, is something that i don’t take lightly) and also, well, she’s HOT, i decided to share 25 random things with you…

(but, alas, internets, this list was hard. because as you know, i am QUEEN OF THE OVERSHARE. i mean, come on, i tell you when i have foot-long pieces of toilet paper hanging out the rear-end of my jeans)

(is there anything i haven’t told you yet?)

1. I have never done yoga for fear that i might fart mid-pose. or that someone else might fart and then i would be forced to inappropriately laugh, because, hi! i’m 12! farts ARE funny.

2. I can probably eat more sushi than you can.

3. I totally give a fuck about an Oxford Comma.

4. I have yet to purchase a 2009 daily planner. I’m currently re-using last year’s. and it’s not the first year I’ve done this either.

5. I am reconsidering my opinion that my all-time favorite tv couple is Winnie and Kevin…i now think it might be Desmond and Penny. (honorable mentions go to Jim and Pam and Dylan and Brenda and Angela and Jordan)


6. I don’t wash my face. ever. and i rarely wear deodorant. i have never been much of a perspirer. actually, the ONLY place i sweat is between the girls…and since they don’t market an antiperspirant for boobs, i’m shit out of luck there.

7. I only went to gym class ONCE in all four years of high school. and that day’s activity was a group walk to 7-11 for slurpees. somehow i still managed to pass gym…probably because my school seemed to put little emphasis on physical activity (um, see 7-11 example above)

8. I have a mad girl crush on Frances McDormand. I have wanted to make out with her since she was Dot in Raising Arizona.

9. Occasionally i dream that i am in the middle of World War II, trapped in a concentration camp.

10. Indian Curry = GROSS; Thai Curry = HEAVEN

11. I have never been properly fitted for a bra…i mean, by anyone other than my mother, who thinks she is a bra expert. so, i may NOT be a 34C. PS. my mother STILL insists on fixing my bra straps whenever she and i are in a dressing room.

12. I love old airplanes. I am fascinated by how they were built, how they looked, how they flew. I have a huge collection of images of old airplanes. Researching the Avro Arrow for a work project was probably one of my career highlights. BUT i hate to fly. this has to do with my control issues. i think i would enjoy FLYING a plane, just not being flown in one.

13. I love fountain pop. pretty much daily i will announce, usually to no one in particular…”i REALLY want a huge fountain diet coke right now”


14. I will not use an electric can opener. all i can think of is all the tuna juice caked onto the blade. it’s probably irrational, since i don’t even allow tuna cans into my house, but still. only manual openers for me. (ps. canned tuna…or canned MEAT of any kind makes me want to vomit)

15. I never, ever finish my coffee. and i know i’ll never finish it. but i still get the bigger cup, because it’s a bigger cup and it looks better. i always order a grande at Starbucks, even though tall is perfect. i order a large at Tim Horton’s, even though a medium is perfect

16. I have issues with fruit.

17. I do not think that Oscar snubbed The Dark Knight.

18. I wish my car wasn’t so messy. I cannot bring myself to keep it clean. mostly because i cannot bring myself to bring my shit inside. so, currently in my car there are no less than 4 library books, three pairs of gloves, a pair of Uggs, unmailed mail, unopened mail, at least 3 empty diet coke cans, receipts, emergency hair elastics, gum wrappers, and pens.

19. The sound of somebody chewing makes my skin crawl.

20. When i am cold, which is 99% of the time, my nose turns red. like, we’re talking Rudolph Red.

21. i go commando more often than not. and only flashed my Britney once. and it was in the parking lot of my local library (where, incidentally, i spend a tremendous amount of time. and where, also incidentally, i get picked up by 14-year-old boys) and i was getting out of my car. and i flashed a rabbi. i don’t know who was more traumatized. and then there was that time i flashed the internet, but luckily, i was wearing purple underwear at the time…


22. I really know nothing about wine. I drink it because i’m supposed to. i mean, i like it just fine. but, you can give me an $8 bottle of wine or an $800 bottle of wine, and i may not be able to tell the difference. my parents would probably be ashamed to know this.

23. I hate taking the car in for work. I even hate PICKING UP THE CAR once it’s already had the work done to it. Car Mechanics in general skeeve me out, and i just *know* they are going to somehow convince me to drop more money than i should.

24. I hate when people use the word itch when they should be using the world scratch. “i can’t stop itching my mosquito bite” is NOT right. you scratch an itch. how hard is this to remember?

25. I am allowing my soon-to-be 8-year-old daughter to have her very first sleepover birthday party. TWELVE PRE-TWEEN SECOND-GRADERS SLEEPING OVER AT MY HOUSE. clearly, i’ve lost my damn mind.

and lookie here, a bonus picture for those of you who haven’t fallen asleep yet…


things to note about the picture above:

a) i play a tremendous amount of SORRY! on the weekends. it’s the ONLY game i can play with all three of my children.

b) i always lose

c) my dog still has a cone on his head

d) i seriously need to stop dressing like i’m homeless

e) i seriously need my roots done

  1. Okay I’m with you on the deodorant thing. Unless I’m going to be doing something particularly hot/sweaty, I don’t bother. No one has ever noticed.

    But the face washing thing? Do you mean that you don’t make a point of washing it specifically with face soap? Or you don’t wash it at all? Because when I wake up in the morning my day-old makeup is all jacked up and I don’t think any concealer in the world could cover smeary gross racoony day-old mascara eyes. I’m just saying… 🙂

    Comment by Lyndsey on January 30, 2009
  2. I’ve been tagged about 7 times to do this.
    I have yet to bother.

    I don’t wash my face either. My friends were mortified that I don’t wash my makeup off before I got to bed and that when I shower, I use the shampoo that I have in my hair to wash my face.
    Is that bad? Should I publicly admit that?
    In any case, I have great skin.

    Christines last blog post..Fuck

    Comment by Christine on January 30, 2009
  3. Is that picture supposed to be you flashing us? YOU HARLOT!

    slynnros last blog post..It’s Everyone’s Lucky Day!

    Comment by slynnro on January 30, 2009
  4. You are freaking me out. I thought you were talking about me. I never wash my face (except in the shower when the water can’t help but hit it) and I am one of those people that people always tell, “You have such beautiful skin.” Commando…talk about TMI…but I’ve been doing that more often since my hysterectomy…which makes you think about why…which makes you think, ew, gross, TMI.

    14, 15, 17, 18…uh huh!!!

    And chewing? I have to use every ounce of will I have not to go up to someone chewing gum and tell him/her how disgusting it sounds. And I leave the room when my husband eats cereal. And if I couldn’t, we’d probably be divorced.

    I’m almost NEVER cold except when I wake up after having a peri-menopausal midnight hot flash. Yuck!

    You rock, Ali!!!

    Comment by Di on January 30, 2009
  5. I already know we’re Life Twins, but items 13-15 are so random (and yet SO me also) that this time, I really do think we were separated at birth.

    Comment by metalia on January 30, 2009
  6. I love that you managed to get like 30 bits of info into that list of 25. lol

    I totally get the chewing thing, but loud drinkers/swallowers make me gag.

    Comment by AJ on January 30, 2009
  7. There is nothing as good as fountain Diet Coke! too funny, my sisters & I always wonder why McDonald’s Diet Coke is the best by far!

    Comment by Maria on January 30, 2009
  8. So many things to comment on! I HATE seeing mechanics too. Or even going to the auto part store to buy windshield wiper fluid. I always thing they are JUDGING me!

    I used to work with this girl who had this weird thing with her jaw and when she chewed, it sounded like her teeth were clicking together. It was SO LOUD. I spent many a sales meeting next to her wanting to strangle her.

    Kristabellas last blog post..House Hunting = EPIC STRESS

    Comment by Kristabella on January 30, 2009
  9. Oh man. See, this is why I don’t want to do the 25 things, I’m not nearly as interesting as you.

    Kaleighas last blog post..A trip down memory TV…

    Comment by Kaleigha on January 30, 2009
  10. Ummmmm re: #1, that is a CONSTANT problem on this end, both for me and the others in my class… 😉

    Comment by Camels & Chocolate on January 30, 2009
  11. ALI! Every day…every single day…I announce to no one in particular “Gah! I could suck down a trough of Diet Mt. Dew from the fountain!!” Clearly, we are bonded!

    Also, the other day, I was working on my laptop at the kitchen table, looked about 30 feet across the room to the mirror above my fireplace, and my dark roots were GLARING at me. In the dark!! I have issues.

    differentkindofgirls last blog post..‘get the boys together get a ball get a run(s)’

    Comment by differentkindofgirl on January 30, 2009
  12. i have a question, silly i know, but how do you get the fonts with the words crossed out?

    Joanies last blog post..You Know You’re From Philadelphia When…

    Comment by Joanie on January 30, 2009
  13. You have three kids and I can see your floor. How do you do that?

    Comment by Captain Dumbass on January 30, 2009
  14. #18, did you steal my car?

    Joanies last blog post..You Know You’re From Philadelphia When…

    Comment by Joanie on January 30, 2009
  15. I love being told by people with huge zits and blackheads that I’m disgusting for not washing my face. And the gum thing, OMG, I hate that! but not as much as the itch/scratch here/there bring/take things.

    Comment by Chris on January 30, 2009
  16. You will be one of the first people to know when I’ve done this on Facebook, as I was tagged last night and have a note drafted…

    Comment by Maryann on January 30, 2009
  17. I’m with you on a lot of these! The itch, the World-War-II dreams (only I dream I’m Anne Frank — haven’t since I was a kid, though), the dressing like a homeless person…. As for the rest, your pretty much on your own. 😉

    Comment by Haley-O on January 30, 2009
  18. I’m fascinated with the amount of people that don’t wash their faces.
    You bitches.

    Comment by sherendipity on January 30, 2009
  19. Oh, totally on the no washing the face thing. I used to do it religiously; then when I stopped, my face cleared up. Best decision ever… okay, one of.

    Comment by Nenette on January 31, 2009
  20. I am in the same boat when it comes to wine. I know nothing about it. I don’t care where it came from or how much it cost. I either like it or I don’t.

    Dawns last blog post..but the question is: when did we decide we wanted to live in a climate-controlled bubble?

    Comment by Dawn on January 31, 2009
  21. I still think you’re fabulous!
    Great facts. Thanks for sharing.

    btw – you wouldn’t not believe how much sushi I ate tonight – it was aLOT.

    monstergirlees last blog post..Piles of Junk

    Comment by monstergirlee on January 31, 2009
  22. My son had a sleepover when he turned 8. They loved it. I am still deaf and recovering from their antics. He is 25 now. Good luck.

    Comment by Jack on January 31, 2009
  23. Dude, I think I got all your sweat glands. Now as for your list:
    #15 – I’ve actually blogged about the same thing. Drives SB nuts.
    #19 – hate it, hate it, hate it, want to ban gum from this house.
    #22 – WORD – I also cannot tell wines apart, I like it or I don’t – that’s all that matters IMO. And anyone who tries to make me feel bad about that, is an insecure trendoid.
    #25 – proves to me, you have lost your mind.

    Nothing wrong with dressing like you are homeless. And great, now because of #14, I’m going manual.

    Comment by katie ~ motherbumper on January 31, 2009
  24. I love reading these lists and learning more about people. And YES – Desmond and Penny. Totally. You had me at Desmond. Hee… Now I can read the rest.

    Comment by Keri on January 31, 2009
  25. Yes, Indian Curry = BARF.
    Yes, I crave Thai Curry on a regular basis.

    Comment by Rhi on January 31, 2009
  26. Your family is adorable. You and me and cars? Pretty much identical. Hate having work done and my car is full of shit.

    Comment by Keri on January 31, 2009
  27. I’ve been tagged tons of times on this … I can’t think of 25 things.

    Comment by Teena in Toronto on January 31, 2009
  28. okay, I’ll forgive you on the no deodorant because I sometimes forget my own. And because we share a love for fountain beverages, although where I live it’s called SODA 🙂

    Kates last blog post..Google Reader

    Comment by Kate on January 31, 2009
  29. I only wash my face in the morning, never at night. Too lazy and I hate washing my face at the sink. ALWAYS in the shower.

    I LOL’d for REALZ at the stop dressing like you’re homless because I am wearing prit-near the same thing you are in that pic. LOL

    Comment by sam {temptingmama} on January 31, 2009
  30. We have the same stripey pink/maroon shirt in the last picture and the Itch/Scratch thing makes me pinch people. Hard.

    Comment by Zoeyjane on February 1, 2009
  31. number 8 is why I have a mad girl crush on YOU alimartell. I THINK I’M GONNA BARF!

    Comment by heather... on February 1, 2009
  32. I loved reading this! You are one fascinating chick.

    Comment by amreen on February 1, 2009
  33. I don’t wash my face either. Mainly because I don’t think about it.

    I’m madly in love with Desmond. He’s lucky that I think Penny is adorable.

    Comment by Courtney on February 1, 2009
  34. See? You come up with 25 random things that you think no one else does and everybody chimes in with a “me too”! Stupid universal human nature.

    I loved this list.

    Comment by Margaret (Nanny Goats) on February 1, 2009
  35. Awesome. The boyfriend’s mom is a dead ringer for Frances McDormand. Weird.

    Juliennes last blog post..Dodged a bullet.

    Comment by Julienne on February 2, 2009
  36. picture me doubled over with laughter, not having enough air left to repeat the phrase, ‘I flashed a rabbi’. That made my day. (probably made the rabbi’s day too!)

    Comment by Mac & Cheese on February 2, 2009
  37. Okay, um, I’m about to graduate from college in 3 months and I don’t even KNOW what an Oxford Comma is…is that bad???

    Diannas last blog post..Weekend Re-Cap & Don’t forget to enter the GIVEAWAY

    Comment by Dianna on February 2, 2009
  38. I loved the game sorry when I was a kid!

    Comment by Multi-Tasking Mommy on February 8, 2009
  39. […] I – like someone else I know – cannot, try as I might, finish any drink I ever order. It’s not the first time I have mentioned this. I have the best intentions, really, but I suffer from a sort of coffee ADD. I drink and it’s […]

    Pingback by Cheaper Than Therapy » Blog Archive » this really wasn’t supposed to be about wiener on September 4, 2009

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