you’ve seen them everywhere. they are all the rage this season. Sienna Miller wears them. so does Mischa Barton. and Nicole Richie. and Kate Bosworth. and Kate Moss. and the Olsens. well, at least Ashley.
call ’em what you like. the drainpipe jean. the cigarette jean. the peg-leg jeans. the skinny jean.
unsurprisingly, skinny jeans look good on…well…skinny people.
After years of the bootcut and flare jeanÃ‚Â – a style that flattered EVERY figure, including my ownÃ‚Â – thin is in. Ã‚Â
wear them under boots! wear them with heels! wear them with ballerina flats! Advertisers everywhere are going to try to convince you that YOU can wear the skinny jean.
and i’m going to tell you that you can’t. this ultra-slim fit is not for mass consumption.
it’s bad enough that designers everywhere tried to convince women of all shapes and sizes that low-slung jeans were the way to go. and when this happened, there were pot-bellies and muffin-butt happening left, right, and center. now, far be it for me to say that everyone has to be skinny. no. that’s not what i’m saying at all. what i am saying, however, is that just because something is trendy, does not mean that it’s going to look good on you.
and i can tell you right now. my short, stumpy thighs and i will continue to wear our bootcuts and steer clear of anything called “skinny”.
oh, and the long tunics? and the leggings? and the dolman sleeves? and the giant wide belts? why are the 80’s coming back? does no one realize that the 80’s were a serious fashion disaster decade? we are this far from neon, banana clips, and giant teased hair, people. i’m afraid. i’m very afraid.