*[ 13 January, 2009 ]

mortification. and some winners. and some snowIndy

my kids do their fair share of embarrassing me.

You have to develop a thick skin around children, probably even thicker with the Martell kids

because sure they might play cute on tv…

bath

but i assure you, in reality, they are mortification machines.

I mean how can you not DIE when your 7-year-old looks at you and says, “you are going to wear THAT? really?” or when your child thinks that George Clooney is on the US dollar bill. or when your 3-year-old announces in a public bathroom that she can see the hairy stripe on your pagina. or when your son points to a woman at Canada’s Wonderland and says “wow! that lady is SO fat!” or when he announces to an entire flight of passengers on an airplane that he just farted in his own face. (okay, fine, i kinda sorta maybe laughed at that one) or when your daughter uses “THAT’S WHAT SHE SAID” properly. in front of your parents.

ah, kids. joy of joys.

but what EXACTLY do you do when you and your son are walking into a mall and he marches right up to a smoking woman near the entrance, raises his little 6-year-old voice and announces:

“YOU ARE GOING TO DIE, YOU KNOW!”

permission to die, sir?

i mean, payback will be a bitch, right? it’s coming, right? those years where my mere presence will embarrass the hell out of all three of my children? i. can’t. wait.

divider2

so, last week we had a little contest over here at Cheaper Than Therapy. Sadly, it was only for Canadian readers, which i felt a little bit bad about only really i didn’t so much because why is every contest always only for US residents?

anyway, i decided that since i love you internets so much that instead of only ONE $25 gift card, i’m going to give out TWO. and i’m seeking the help of my very own assistant to help me choose the winners.

say hi to Miss Emily and her hat:

emily1

say hi to all the entries:

emily3

say hi to winner #1:

emily6

emily5

say hi to winner #2:

emily4

emily7

there you have it! Congrats to Sam and Syd! I will be in touch with you both sometime today!

and in case any of you were wondering how my southern puppy was going to take to our northern abundance of snow…i think you need not worry. it seems he can’t get enough.

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I suppose our children are supposed to be our payback…but my mom swears I was never this bad. So I don’t know who I ticked off to deserve all of this.

My 6yo met one of my aunts for the first time last year and went running away in tears yelling, “That man scares me!” hahaha Humiliating, yes, but sometimes they’re just saying exactly what we’re thinking while they’re cute enough to get away with it. lol

[ 13 Jan 09 ]

Have I already asked if he is a Lhasa? He’s SOOO CUTE and reminds me of the dogs my Grandma had when I was little.

Also – my biggest fear is that I’ll one day have a child who is sassier and/or smarter than I am. Or, more clever. But, I think your kids have the market cornered on clever.

[ 13 Jan 09 ]

At first skim, I thought that said you had Missy Elliott and her hat draw for your gift card winners, and I thought, “Damn! Ali knows some people!”

differentkindofgirls last blog post..if he brings home a whiny teenage girl and tells me he’s in love, i’ll know for sure he’s accepted the curse

[ 13 Jan 09 ]

Somewhere on the internet, there’s a blog post about a person who has decided to quit smoking after a precocious little boy came up to her and told her she was going to die.

Good for Josh.

[ 13 Jan 09 ]

My 5 yo told me yesterday I was “sexy and hot”. And not b/c he hears his dad say it all the time….

Teris last blog post..5 Things you probably didn’t know about J.

[ 13 Jan 09 ]

Seems as though those kids merely say what the rest of us wanted to say in those situations. Hilarious too.

Surfer Jays last blog post..Got Wood?

[ 13 Jan 09 ]

hahaha! kids say some pretty funny things…

[ 13 Jan 09 ]

Yay me!!!!!!

And I want to hug and squeeze your kids!! Totally.

[ 13 Jan 09 ]

OK. You’re making me think a dog might not be THAT bad.

[ 13 Jan 09 ]

the hairy stripe on your pagina made me laugh

except not in a creepy way

[ 13 Jan 09 ]

I love your kids. Pagina. HA HA! And yes, I’m sure you will give them their due amount of payback.:)

Kaleighas last blog post..You there, Delurk!

[ 13 Jan 09 ]

The matching pajamas will be a good start once their all in their teens.

[ 13 Jan 09 ]

Indy is SO, SO CUTE!

Be sure to keep this post handy if Josh ever decides to pick up smoking! :)

Kristabellas last blog post..Locks of Love

[ 13 Jan 09 ]

Yep, their days are coming. Just wait until they hit the teen years…then EVERYTHING will be an embarrassment. Yay for payback!

Lynettes last blog post..Monday Meanderings

[ 13 Jan 09 ]

OH NO HE DI-INT!!! Oh, but that was awesome….

I love your dog! PRESH!

[ 13 Jan 09 ]

so it seems I love joshie too.

[ 13 Jan 09 ]

What kind of dog is that? A Shih Tzu? I want one!

[ 13 Jan 09 ]

Your kids? I love them.

[ 13 Jan 09 ]

O.M.G. .. pagina .. lmao!!! I only have ONE kid and she nearly kills me sometimes. I’m not bright enough to be embarassed by her .. but she’s had me laughing so hard that she’s nearly taken me out, seriously.

your little doggie is a doll! love that crazy runnin’ in the snow thing. Mine does that, but she’s not so cute .. she’s great big lol

[ 13 Jan 09 ]

huh. seeing a puppy frolicking in the snow makes me want another baby. go figure.

[ 14 Jan 09 ]

omg that is sooo funny! I am constantly telling my kids about how bad things are for them (smoking), how unhealthy (taking medicine that they don’t need), how bad for the environment (littering), how unsafe (not wearing safety gear on motorcycles).
Thanks for the laugh. f’in funny.

monstergirlees last blog post..Windswept Ocean Cliffs

[ 14 Jan 09 ]

LMAO! What a riot. I don’t know why the saying is “Kids say the darndest things”. Shouldn’t it be more like “Kids say crap that makes you want to hang them up by their toes in the closet you’ll be hiding in for the next week”?

And congrats to the winners.

[ 14 Jan 09 ]

Well, at least your kids are well educated on the matter! That is hilarious.

I have taught the bunny that if someone is smoking near our car then we have to get in quickly so that we don’t smell it because it is unhealthy. Now, she asks (really loud I might add), “Mommy is someone smoking? Do we have to rush?” each time we get to the car.

[ 14 Jan 09 ]

Several years ago I was flying with my two boys who were very young at the time. Since I knew we would be on the plane for the next 10 hours I knew I had better pinch one off beforehand. I was in the stall with my then 2 year old son when he said “mom are you pooping? You’re pooping mom, you’re pooping! I can see it mom.” He would not be quiet about it. I felt so proud when I walked out of the stall to see a long line of women waiting… just fighting for my stall I’m sure.

[ 15 Jan 09 ]

OMG i am dying laughing at christy’s above comment. WOW too funny!

[ 10 Feb 09 ]

The pagina killed me :)
I found it on Blogations; hope you don’t mind but I linked to your blog.
Laura´s last blog ..Blogtations My ComLuv Profile

[ 16 Jan 10 ]

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