July 9 08

remember when they couldn’t find my appendix?? (fucking ultrasound techs) well, in an effort to locate my missing appendix AND figure out what the heck is wrong with my stomach, i was scheduled for a cat scan this morning.

um, yeah…

first…there was the drink. the “cocktail” as she tried to pass it off was double gulp sized…but contained liquid death. and for the record, let me explain, that among the wonderful weird things about Ali, you can add another: i don’t like to be force fed or force hydrated. as soon as i’m told i am required to drink or eat something, i can’t. my body freezes. and i can’t do it. you should have seen me when i had to drink that fucking orange crap for the gestational diabetes tests (dear readers, i never was able to drink them. ever) (good thing i wasn’t Metalia…who had to go back thrice)

and then there was the lovely little explanation about the injection she was going to give me. i’m not at all squeamish about needles. giving blood. taking blood. it’s all good to me. (Dylan making Brenda give blood on valentine’s day? ROMANTIC. not creepy) what i am squeamish about, however, is when the nurse is all “i’m going to inject something into you that is going to make you smell strange things and have a strange taste in your mouth. and you’ll probably feel pretty awful for the next few hours.”

hells no.

and that was when i hopped off the table, politely returned the cocktail. and ran the heck out of the diagnostics lab.

i’ll live with the pain thankyouverymuch. the funny this is that it wasn’t the giant machine i was scared of…

it was the drink.

the good news of the day is that there’s a Cheesecake Factory in San Francisco. and i plan on eating there next weekend, stomach pain or not. at least twice. ha.

who’s in?

yes, yes. i AM going to that little conference in SF next week…and yes, i AM looking forward to getting licked

i need to get a me button like Mrs. Flinger…Ali says “i will take you to Cheesecake Factory” or “i won’t dance with you” at blogher ’08 (because, dude, if you saw me dance…you wouldn’t want me to dance with you either!)

are YOU going? please let me know! and please tell me i’m not the only one who hasn’t gotten a new haircut/new clothes/new shoes/new anything for this event. the only thing i’ve bought is a giant suitcase that i didn’t need at all, but it was pink. i’m saving my money for Anthropologie, of course!!

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  1. New clothes and shoes have been purchased. Hair is getting done this weekend and a mani/pedi on Monday.

    You know, so y’all can meet the REAL me :)

    Angellas last blog post..Or So The Saying Goes

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    Comment by Angella on July 9, 2008
  2. Ali you are so lucky to get to go to San Fran and see all those great bloggers! How fun! Sorry about the scan – I had one a while back – not fun. Did you have to lie there and listened to the muffled voice 100 times go “take a deep breath”…until you felt like dying? That’s what I had to do. And the metally taste and the burning? Very weird. I’m sure my drink aversion was not as bad as yours, but I certainly did not enjoy the experience either. And that cheesecake – yeah, I’d be eating that no matter what. Love the peanut butter cup cheesecake.

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    Comment by KathyM on July 9, 2008
  3. Man, I wanted to go to BlogHer so bad. But my wife said no. Something about being surrounded by throngs of women…

    Matthews last blog post..Meeting Bloggers can be dangerous to your kid’s health

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    Comment by Matthew on July 9, 2008
  4. The pre-BlogHer hair appointment is a grand, grand tradition. Have you SEEN my roots? heh

    I’m totally down for any eating establishment with the word “Cheesecake” right there in the title.

    Assertagirls last blog post..Of bank accounts and beer.

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    Comment by Assertagirl on July 9, 2008
  5. Um, I have spent so much money on crap to bring. And I’ll probably end up just bring old stuff.

    I’m so down for Cheesecake factory. Because cheesecake doesn’t have meat! YAY!

    Kristies last blog post..Is she a mean dog?

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    Comment by Kristie on July 9, 2008
  6. I’m getting my haircut tomorrow. The new clothes are piled up and ready to be packed. The heels are packed.

    I love me some Cheesecake Factory. Can’t wait!

    ohmommys last blog post..It’s official. I’m having a full blown mid-life crisis.

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    Comment by ohmommy on July 9, 2008
  7. I bought new shoes. They’re Nike running shoes.

    I won’t get a haircut, because my hair is looking pretty good right now and I don’t want to fuck it all up.

    Be prepared for long lines at the Cheesecake Factory.

    Backpacking Dads last blog post..Thirty-one

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    Comment by Backpacking Dad on July 9, 2008
  8. Maybe instead of the CAT scan they could do some sort of exploratory surgery to locate the appendix? Surgery doesn’t require you to drink anything.

    SciFi Dads last blog post..And Then I Got Married

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    Comment by SciFi Dad on July 9, 2008
  9. Alas, I am not going because I”m a total introvert when it comes to stuff like this, as the Toronto bloggers must know by now. It sounds like SO much fun, though.

    And, get thee on that table PRONTO. Drink or no drink. We must find that appendix of yours!

    Haley-Os last blog post..Our Country Vacay!

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    Comment by Haley-O on July 9, 2008
  10. Since I am no fabulous blogger I will not be attending any bloggy fun in SanFran… however, I will be having Cheesecake Factory in Indianapolis on Sunday.

    Sounds like it’s going to be an amazing time though!

    Hope you find your appendix soon!!

    [Reply]

    Comment by Sarah on July 9, 2008
  11. I’ve had that injection. It was way worse than the scary machine. The injection made me sob. It made my arm burn. It made me gag for 4 straight hours. It made me yell hysterically (while sobbing) at a cab driver for getting stuck in rush hour traffic. Yes, that was a good day. I have to say, though, that getting the test results and not having to worry anymore that my brain was broken made it worth while.

    hillarys last blog post..One Backless Strapless Copper Thread Gown

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    Comment by hillary on July 9, 2008
  12. I have a gag reflex. I can’t do those drinks, I seriously will throw up (and have).

    I’ve been to the CF in SF (ha) and it was so pretty… and delish. Hmmm mojitoooos…

    Have fun!

    marys last blog post..I am a spoiled brat

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    Comment by mary on July 9, 2008
  13. Dude, I would have booked it too.

    I’m not going to BlogHer – eat some cheesecake for me, mmmkay?

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    Comment by mamatulip on July 9, 2008
  14. Of COURSE I’ll dance with you! Because I’m the same way. And cheesecake? DONE!

    XO

    Can’t wait!

    [Reply]

    Comment by Mrs. Flinger on July 9, 2008
  15. When the Mrs. had to gulp down the drink, it was referred to as Satan’s Tang. Smart move on your part…

    Hockeymans last blog post..Found Porn

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    Comment by Hockeyman on July 9, 2008
  16. going. dur. no new clothes. fuck it. you just keep drinking and you’ll think i’m hot anyway. :)

    jennsters last blog post..are you like your blog?

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    Comment by jennster on July 9, 2008
  17. Not going, I’m afraid. I’d say ‘have a drink for me,’ but seeing how you started the post…

    kgirls last blog post..Ketchup Stew and Other Tastes of Childhood

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    Comment by kgirl on July 9, 2008
  18. You’re going too??? AGH!! This bites. I have been internally struggling with driving up there and I just dont see it happening. Now I’m super sad in my pants.

    Misss last blog post..We got badges!

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    Comment by Miss on July 9, 2008
  19. Ahhh, I am so bummed I’m not going to be here to meet you =( Guess that means, I need to soon schedule a trip to Toronto!!!

    Also, I’ve never had my Cat scanned, but it looks super scary!

    Cheesecake Factory?? A woman after my own heart.

    Camels & Chocolates last blog post..Welcome to the World, Baby Girl

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    Comment by Camels & Chocolate on July 9, 2008
  20. Dude. You know I spent eleventy billion dollars on clothes already. And I got a new PINK suitcase too!

    slynnros last blog post..What is BUGGING me NOW.

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    Comment by slynnro on July 9, 2008
  21. Can’t wait to meet you there! And before I was worried about people having cuter shoes…now I have to worry about cuter luggage too? :)

    Katies last blog post..Our Weekend at the Seashore

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    Comment by Katie on July 9, 2008
  22. I haven’t spent much if that makes you feel any better. And I’m there! Just don’t say, please, “Well you look at least six months pregnant” because, um, I’ll cry.

    But do hug me! And take me to the Cheesecake Factory with you!

    She Likes Purples last blog post..Last One Before I Go Back To Talking About Shoes Or Clothes Or Veronica Mars

    [Reply]

    Comment by She Likes Purple on July 9, 2008
  23. i’ll be there and i can’t wait to give you a huge squishy hug! :) please be nice to me and don’t laugh at my dorky excitement!

    Laras last blog post..What Not to Wear (in the Air)

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    Comment by Lara on July 9, 2008
  24. I haven’t bought a thing. And actually need to get a bigger suitcase. That might be the one thing I buy.

    I get my hair done every 8-10 weeks, which just happened to fall before BlogHer. Nothing special here.

    Although I am freaking out about it. Because no one wants to be Schlubby McGee.

    Kristabellas last blog post..Jesus Juice

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    Comment by Kristabella on July 9, 2008
  25. At least you still have enough blood in your head to run out of there. I would just pass out, because I’m THAT queasy when it comes to merely “hearing” about medical procedures.

    Meanwhile, I’m trying not to think about all the people I’m going to miss meeting because I’m not going to BlogHer this year. And it’s probably as close to my hometown as it will ever be again! WAHHH!!!!!

    Margarets last blog post..Hell Hath No Fury Like a Woman Scorched

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    Comment by Margaret on July 9, 2008
  26. I am not attending Blogher.

    I already signed up for BlogWhore in Las Vegas which happens to be that same weekend.

    180/360s last blog post..Bad, Pupil Pupa, Bad!

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    Comment by 180/360 on July 9, 2008
  27. Really? SF?? That’s, ahem, mighty close to where I reside thank you… you know, way closer than places like Toronto or Brooklyn.

    Maryanns last blog post..Links Times Three?

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    Comment by Maryann on July 9, 2008
  28. I’m going!!! And my hubs will be at the hotel, but he’s just going to be drunk in the bar the whole time.

    Also, uh, don’t tell my husband, but I might have just dropped over four hundo at anthropologie today. Who the HELL do I think I am? I can’t eat for a month now.

    heathers last blog post..I Was a Ten Year Old Freak

    [Reply]

    Comment by heather on July 9, 2008
  29. So you can give blood no problem but hate boats?!

    I don’t get it!

    Teena in Torontos last blog post..Detoxing

    [Reply]

    Comment by Teena in Toronto on July 9, 2008
  30. Um, I think I need more shoes.
    As far as Cheesecake Factory goes, I’m in! Mostly because I live about 5 miles from one and…..uh, I’ve never been? *hides face sheepishly*

    Bris last blog post..Quick and Dirty BlogHer post

    [Reply]

    Comment by Bri on July 9, 2008
  31. I’m going! New clothes have not been purchased but probably will be in SF. I don’t trust anyone with my hair this close to BlogHer, so no, no haircut. I am definitely up for cheesecake, anytime.

    [Reply]

    Comment by Missy on July 9, 2008
  32. Hmm, Ali, it appears my wife is unaware that I read your blog. Four hundred bucks, aye, Heather?

    As Ricky Ricardo would say… “Honey, you got some ‘splainin’ to do!”

    [Reply]

    Comment by Mike on July 9, 2008
  33. CAN’T WAIT!!!!

    AbsolutelyBananass last blog post..Housekeeping Tips

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    Comment by AbsolutelyBananas on July 10, 2008
  34. crap.

    busted.

    heathers last blog post..I Was a Ten Year Old Freak

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    Comment by heather on July 10, 2008
  35. OMG – is there an Anthropolgie in walking distance of the conference BECAUSE I’M ALL OVER THAT. GAH – see you next week. And I would have hopped off the table too – something that makes you smell bad? No thank you very much.

    motherbumpers last blog post..I’ve gone straight (well kinda)

    [Reply]

    Comment by motherbumper on July 10, 2008
  36. I think I’m more jealous of the fact that you get to go to Cheesecake Factory, that then fact that you are going to BlogHer.

    Seriously.

    b*babblers last blog post..The limits of graciousness

    [Reply]

    Comment by b*babbler on July 12, 2008
  37. Sooo not the point of your post, but can I say how much I LOVE Anthropologie??

    nomotherearths last blog post..An Affair to Remember

    [Reply]

    Comment by nomotherearth on July 13, 2008
  38. I remember when I got an MRI done and they did the injection. That feeling of HOT running through my body completely freaked me out…I wanted to run out, but kinda couldn’t, I was already attached…POOR YOU! Well, I’m glad you didn’t go through it for your sake.

    Multi-Tasking Mommys last blog post..Back to life….Back to reality!

    [Reply]

    Comment by Multi-Tasking Mommy on July 14, 2008
  39. OH! AND, can you PLEASE bring me home a cheesecake? Notice…I’m not saying a piece? ;) Come on…I’m pregnant.

    Multi-Tasking Mommys last blog post..Back to life….Back to reality!

    [Reply]

    Comment by Multi-Tasking Mommy on July 14, 2008
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