June 3 08

as kids, my siblings and i spent a large majority of our time in the ER waiting room.

As children of a self-proclaimed hypochondriac, if something was hurting, we were in emerg. and we were sure it was THE WORST. sore foot? it’s obviously broken. headache? brain tumor. rash? lyme disease. neck pain? meningitis.

i’ve got the hypochondriac gene in me, it seems. but, i, unlike my mother, avoid the doctor and the hospital like, well, like the plague. when something hurts me, i ignore it. and when it starts to hurt more, i ignore more. i’m a GREAT ignorer! remember how long it took me to get my ass to a physiotherapist??

thanks to my best friend google, i can do all my self-diagnosing from the comforts of my own bed. awesome.

subject presents with the following symptoms: severe stomach pain. we’re talking nonstop contraction. possible fever, although she was too lazy to find the thermometer to know for sure.

could be: appendicitis. ruptured ovarian cyst. kidney stones. ectopic pregnancy. gall bladder.

probably is: gas

it is not gas. i know this because i bit the bullet and ended up in Dr. Jack’s office this morning. and then on to York Central for an ultrasound and an xray. there was talk of a nodule. i don’t like to hear words like ‘nodule’

(just fyi…having an ultrasound when you aren’t having a baby?? BLOWS.)

(also…drinking 2 liters of water and not being able to pee?? also BLOWS.)

diagnosis: the jury is still out. could be anything.

treatment: taking a swim in this…

which arrived last night. Thanks, Dad and Doris. you guys are the best! mwah!

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  1. OMG so jealous, I want me some Samoas AHHHHHHH.

    Chantals last blog post..long overdue

    [Reply]

    Comment by Chantal on June 3, 2008
  2. My wife also self-diagnoses herself. Drives. Me. Crazy.

    Whenever she tells me what she has or doesn’t have, I just say, “Okay Doc.”

    Of course, if it’s ME I have to get my butt to the real Doctor pronto.

    [Reply]

    Comment by Matthew on June 3, 2008
  3. I’m so jealous of all your cookies! Sorry about the pain. That actually happened to me once, I had an enlarged appendix but not enough for them to actually do anything. Thankfully the pain went away…hopefully yours does too!

    KathyMs last blog post..Daycare "incident"

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    Comment by KathyM on June 3, 2008
  4. crossing fingers, thinking good thoughts for the results. did you have to have an internal ultrasound? those are the BEST!

    Beccas last blog post..Going all girlie

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    Comment by Becca on June 3, 2008
  5. I’m sure it’s nothing…keep well!

    Now, about those cookies…the Tagalongs look incredible!!!

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    Comment by Maria on June 3, 2008
  6. Cookies are always the best medicine anyway.

    [Reply]

    Comment by Neil on June 3, 2008
  7. Oh no! I hope you’re OK.

    Envious of the cookies. Matthew polished of my box of Thin Mints PDQ :)

    Angellas last blog post..Canon Canada Rebate

    [Reply]

    Comment by Angella on June 3, 2008
  8. Ha, we are twins! And self-diagnosing online is the worse — I always end up with some type of Stage III cancer, and then in reality it ends up being a cold. Um yeah.

    And I had an ultrasound last year for my stomach issues. You’re right, it was not fun. Oddly enough, the only time I went to the ER was at age 20 when I was living in Scotland. The verdict? Mild case of pneumonia. The remedy? They gave me Advil. ADVIL I tell you.

    Camels & Chocolates last blog post..Summer Travel for Less

    [Reply]

    Comment by Camels & Chocolate on June 3, 2008
  9. I hope everything is OK. I’ll be thinking of you. Please let us know if you find anything out.

    [Reply]

    Comment by Jenn on June 3, 2008
  10. Thin Mints are THE BEST!!!!

    I love the title of this post!!! lol

    And yes, I second you on the baby-less ultrasound… they DO blow.

    Hope they find out what’s wrong soon!!

    Janas last blog post..Adding Insult To Injury

    [Reply]

    Comment by Jana on June 3, 2008
  11. I avoid the doctor too. Although, when I google search symptoms, I always jump to the worst scenario. I’m always tired? I must be BLEEDING ON THE INSIDE!

    Hope everything is OK!

    Kristabellas last blog post..SF: It Isn’t All Fog And Taxi Cab Accidents

    [Reply]

    Comment by Kristabella on June 3, 2008
  12. Oooohhhh…SAAAMOOOOAAAS.

    My first true love.

    Sorry about the gas. Probably IBS. Or ITP. Or Lupus, everything on House is ‘probably lupus’.

    Good luck.

    Good&Crazys last blog post..I’d like to buy the world a Coke…

    [Reply]

    Comment by Good&Crazy on June 3, 2008
  13. Samoas are ABSOLUTELY the best for such illnesses.

    Aimee Greeblemonkeys last blog post..5 Year Old Humor

    [Reply]

    Comment by Aimee Greeblemonkey on June 3, 2008
  14. I hope you feel better soon! Hey, maybe if you eat all of those cookies, it will push the pain out. I think it’s worth considering. For scientific purposes, ‘course.

    The Over-Thinkers last blog post..Tuesday Tootsies: A Variation of Footwear Fridays

    [Reply]

    Comment by The Over-Thinker on June 3, 2008
  15. I was just in the ER for labor-like abdominal pain a few months ago. They think it was Norovirus (I had no vomitting thankfully and no nausea, but horrible pain).

    What do they mean by a “nodule?” That would freak me out a bit. Hope all turns out okay!

    [Reply]

    Comment by BlondeBlogger on June 3, 2008
  16. My mother was the opposite. I practically hacked off my leg when I was ten and my mother put a bandaid on it.

    Teena in Torontos last blog post..Phone wars

    [Reply]

    Comment by Teena in Toronto on June 3, 2008
  17. Thinking of you ..

    Mrs. Chickens last blog post..Sooner Rather Than Later

    [Reply]

    Comment by Mrs. Chicken on June 3, 2008
  18. webmd is bad for me. I could put in “ingrown toenail” and it pops up cancer. Then I freak and head for a MRI. Yeah, my doc told me to stay away Webmd. Sad.

    [Reply]

    Comment by krissy on June 3, 2008
  19. Ohhhhh, no! NEVER self-diagnose via google. As my doc told ME (and you know my problems with google…): every diagnosis somehow tells you it’s cancer or death — got a hangnail? Get thee to ER IMMEDIATELY. ;)

    Haley-Os last blog post..The One Where She Doesn’t Kvetch About Monkeys (untiltheveryend….)

    [Reply]

    Comment by Haley-O on June 4, 2008
  20. I’m a Google Doctor, too.

    180/360s last blog post..2 Parts Funny: Chocolate Babies and the Chunky Funklers

    [Reply]

    Comment by 180/360 on June 4, 2008
  21. Hope you’re ok. Thinking of you.

    Multi-Tasking Mommys last blog post..Widening Wednesday Week 22

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    Comment by Multi-Tasking Mommy on June 4, 2008
  22. Haley forgot one important illness that WebMD tends to lean toward… diabetes. My kids are always diabetic according to that site!

    Alas, I am a googledoc as well.

    lorens last blog post..Day from hell, volume 2

    [Reply]

    Comment by loren on June 4, 2008
  23. A few people I know (including myself..all in TO and Mississauga) had a ‘flu’ the last 2 weeks which included stomach pain and something like acid indigestion. No vomiting…

    [Reply]

    Comment by Mess on June 4, 2008
  24. [...] when they couldn’t find my appendix?? (fucking ultrasound techs) well, in an effort to locate my missing appendix AND figure out what [...]

    Pingback by Cheaper Than Therapy » Blog Archive » my appendix may be lost forever…and blogher on July 9, 2008
  25. It is amazing the amount of virus bugs we’ve seen in our area over the last few months

    [Reply]

    Comment by Peter David Gustafso on February 26, 2011
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