remember when they couldn’t find my appendix?? (fucking ultrasound techs) well, in an effort to locate my missing appendix AND figure out what the heck is wrong with my stomach, i was scheduled for a cat scan this morning.
first…there was the drink. the “cocktail” as she tried to pass it off was double gulp sized…but contained liquid death. and for the record, let me explain, that among the wonderful weird things about Ali, you can add another: i don’t like to be force fed or force hydrated. as soon as i’m told i am required to drink or eat something, i can’t. my body freezes. and i can’t do it. you should have seen me when i had to drink that fucking orange crap for the gestational diabetes tests (dear readers, i never was able to drink them. ever) (good thing i wasn’t Metalia…who had to go back thrice)
and then there was the lovely little explanation about the injection she was going to give me. i’m not at all squeamish about needles. giving blood. taking blood. it’s all good to me. (Dylan making Brenda give blood on valentine’s day? ROMANTIC. not creepy) what i am squeamish about, however, is when the nurse is all “i’m going to inject something into you that is going to make you smell strange things and have a strange taste in your mouth. and you’ll probably feel pretty awful for the next few hours.”
and that was when i hopped off the table, politely returned the cocktail. and ran the heck out of the diagnostics lab.
i’ll live with the pain thankyouverymuch. the funny this is that it wasn’t the giant machine i was scared of…
it was the drink.
the good news of the day is that there’s a Cheesecake Factory in San Francisco. and i plan on eating there next weekend, stomach pain or not. at least twice. ha.
yes, yes. i AM going to that little conference in SF next week…and yes, i AM looking forward to getting licked
i need to get a me button like Mrs. Flinger…Ali says “i will take you to Cheesecake Factory” or “i won’t dance with you” at blogher ’08 (because, dude, if you saw me dance…you wouldn’t want me to dance with you either!)
are YOU going? please let me know! and please tell me i’m not the only one who hasn’t gotten a new haircut/new clothes/new shoes/new anything for this event. the only thing i’ve bought is a giant suitcase that i didn’t need at all, but it was pink. i’m saving my money for Anthropologie, of course!!