April 9 09

the button on my beloved black patent leather Jessica Simpson (like you NEVER…) mary janes popped off while I was at the supermarket grabbing last minute passover essentials. and when i say essentials, i really mean black flats for Emily, a butterfinger bar, and a matching towel and potholder set that i totally didn’t need. Letting me loose in a supermarket (grocery store? what do you say?) is never a good idea, especially while broken. Those superstores – you kn0w the ones, where you can buy mascara and chicken and a television and a pea coat and a novel and a couch all in the same place – were created for people like ME.

i don’t even remember why i told you this. oh yes! because did you know that a cobbler is a real profession? i had no idea. the husband says ever-so-casually, “oh, that button is so not a big deal. just take it over to the cobbler.”


WHAT? They really exist? also…the word cobbler makes me think of Irish leprechauns. or pie. or something.  i felt like Gisele in Enchanted when Robert tells her he’s angry and asks her if she’s ever heard of that unpleasant emotion and she was all “well, i have heard of it…”

PS. in case you are wondering, my life is all about Enchanted right now. Isabella watches it. and then watches it again. and then watches it again. (and even after seeing it 87 times a week, i still giggle every time she sings “to the gay refrain of a happy working song” *snicker*) (hi, i am 12)


as if it’s some remote word that really doesn’t exist. or only exists in disney movies. like a clocksmith. and did you know that there’s something called a cordwainer? i swear to god. I remember my 12th grade English teacher using that word, but she was at least 108 at the time, so there were MANY things she said that i ignored. Ah, Mrs. Rosenwald, how i doubted you and your cordwainer! I do feel badly about this, but then again, her genius ebbed and flowed in high school. One moment she was filling my brain with pure genius and the next minute the entire class would get up and pretend that the bell rang. ah, high school. also, i won’t tell you that the geriatric Mrs. R and i both had the same GAP vest. my god, i loved that vest. it had patches. PATCHES! I LOVE PATCHES (do not ask me to tell you about my love for professors with elbow patches on their jackets….it’s OBSCENE). and plaid!


(oh. you SO wish you had one right now…)

so, yes, i’m talking about cobblers and senile old english teachers today. because rambling is what’s working for me right now. My heart is simply broken for Heather and Mike, and it’s hard to know how to pick up the pieces and move on with living, yanno? I mean, yesterday, i got into the shower (where i do my very best thinking) and as i stood under the water, my mind started to think about all the things little Maddie will never get to do. All the people she’ll never get to meet. All the places she’ll never get to see. I started to think that Heather would never get to watch Maddie play softball like she imagined she would. and as the tears poured out of my face, I wondered how Heather was ever going to be able to get into a shower again.

Also, this must be said before i go back to my rambling. I am so proud to be a part of such a wonderful blogging community. Yesterday, i shied away from posts and twitter and facebook because it was just. too. much. but going through the twitter feed and everyone’s posts and MORE than $20,000 raised on Maddie’s March of Dimes donation page (if you haven’t PLEASE donate) and seeing how hard people worked to get Heather’s site back up and people setting up paypal accounts and making videos and arranging for P.O. Boxes and THIS page (oh this page is just amazing. Meghan = amazing) just how much LOVE everyone has for this family, for this little girl who left this earth too soon, well, my heart is just – albeit bittersweetly – EXPLODING.

now, if you’ll let me, my broken and exploding heart are off to see a man about some shoes.

  1. I was speechless most of yesterday. I am in awe of how this community has pulled together. And some people don’t think we are all real friends…

    I have to say that I SO WISH that vest was still in your parents’ closet so you could model it for us 😉

    Angellas last blog post..Life Is Too Short

    Comment by Angella on April 9, 2009
  2. thats very sad to lose a child no parent should have that happen…

    Comment by LAVENDULA on April 9, 2009
  3. Firstly: Maddie…what an amazing little girl and family.

    Seconldy: Cobblers…I actually volunteered to have my cobbler’s babies after he fixed my red, strappy sandal. And Mr. Cobbler is 60-something, pouchy, with a full beard. But my sandal! It’s fixed! Yes, I love me my cobbler.


    heidikinss last blog post..In which I practically talk myself into a coma, or at least into therapy.

    Comment by heidikins on April 9, 2009
  4. Whatever else Jessica Simpson may be that wench knows shoes. And I love her shoes and I buy them and people who know me most certainly think they are a real designer shoes. Last night buying boring boy shoes in Stride Rite I was looking at her little girl shoes and ZOMG CUTE! Her shoes are so good I’ve been tempted (shhh) to look at her clothing line.

    I have to watch Sponge Bob and Star Wars Clone Wars all the damn time. I’d prefer Enchanted.

    I had to step away yesterday too. It is so overwhelming and shattering.

    Amy @ Milk Breath &s last blog post..Word To Yo Momma

    Comment by Amy @ Milk Breath & on April 9, 2009
  5. I wore my Jessica Simpsons last night for the first time in 2 years and they ripped holes in the backs of my heels =( I hate you, Jessica Simpson, and your crappy made footwear!

    Comment by Camels & Chocolate on April 9, 2009
  6. I don’t have any shoes that I love enough to take to a cobbler. Maybe I should correct this.

    Comment by WickedStepMom on April 9, 2009
  7. I have approximately 730924 pairs of shoes in need of a cobbler. Some of them are even PRADA.

    But I? Am lazy.

    Comment by slynnro on April 9, 2009
  8. I love that I’m not the only person who has a love-hate relationship with the shower. Some of my most brilliant thoughts have come in the shower, but it’s also very difficult to avoid the dark ones in there, too. Those days I have to move a boom box into the bathroom and play Meatloaf at top volume. That helps.

    Comment by MonsteRawr on April 9, 2009
  9. I’ve totally bought JS shoes. At least it’s not Britney perfume, right?

    Comment by Chantal on April 10, 2009
  10. I am AMAZED by the community on the internet. Every time I see a new link about a new way to honor Maddie or help Heather and Mike, I am just speechless. It won’t help bring their little girl back, but I like to think that all the prayers, love and support through the world right now for all of them helps keep them going. Because honestly, I don’t know how they are still going.

    In high school, we played pranks on our AP English teacher. One time, she stupidly left the room before the bell rang and we decided to turn all the desks around to face the wall. Figuring we’d all be facing backward when she came back in. But then the bell rang, so we left. And left the desks like that.

    Kristabellas last blog post..Broken

    Comment by Kristabella on April 10, 2009
  11. This community is beyond amazing. I am so proud to be a part of it. I will be there on tuesday- leaving work and the kids and going to honor my little maddie moo, and my bff heather. Will you be in the area?

    mayas last blog post..

    Comment by maya on April 10, 2009
  12. This post is EXACTLY the reason I shouted you out today. Thanks for sharing!

    Veggie Moms last blog post..We’re All Top Moms!

    Comment by Veggie Mom on April 11, 2009
  13. I am so sorry for the loss that you and especially Heather and Mike are dealing with. You’re a great friend.

    I happen to really like the movie Enchanted, too. I thought Gisele was such a lovely character and the story was just so damn cute.

    Comment by Courtney on April 13, 2009
  14. The shower is definitely the best thinking/crying place in the house.

    If I’m this heartbroken, I can’t even imagine what Mike and Heather are going through.

    And I’ll trade you all the Star Wars movies over and over for Enchanted.

    Comment by threeundertwo on April 13, 2009

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