July 2 08

so, i was going to talk to you about my Canada day yesterday…in which i spent 7 hours with my ass on a maple-leafed chair with a Tim Horton’s coffee in hand, watching my son play in a soccer tournament. all day.

we officially owe my son $11. we told him that he’d get a dollar for every time he kicked the ball. clearly, we don’t have a David Beckham on our hands…but he sure is cute…

anyway, i was also going to talk about the fact that i actually got my ass to a movie theater last night to see my boyfriend turn into this…

and i was going to talk about the roadkill i swerved as to not re-runover this morning, only to have it not be roadkill at all…it was a giant ALF stuffed animal. no, i’m not kidding. some child out there is probably really upset this morning; and some parent is probably smiling with glee.

but there’s something more pressing i need to talk about.

it’s Britney Spears.

yes. i have seen the most recent pictures of Britney Spears flashing her Britney.

(yes, it’s now become a phrase. i used it yesterday, and i’m using it again today. ‘flashing your britney’ is totally taking off. you heard it here first.)

yes, she REALLY needs to be waxed.

yes, if you REALLY need to see the pictures, they are here.

yes, i do believe that sometimes the girl asks for it.

yes, if you are a celebrity, you expect that you are going to have your picture taken when you are out (by people like me. ha!). and yes, if you are a celebrity you should learn how to gracefully get out of a car.

but, this time she was walking up some steps. and there was a photographer underneath, ready to capture her, well, her underneath.

and that is where i draw the line.

have you not seen the South Park? this is where she is headed…

i mean, sure it’s funny. but, really, it’s not funny at all.

(okay, stop laughing)

(for real, stop laughing)

seriously. the girl has enough troubles as it is. can we not just leave her the fuck alone? and go back to gossiping about the important stuff like Spencer Pratt vs Mary Kate Olsen, and how LARGE Matt Damon has gotten for his newest role? come on, people.

  1. Ew.

    Just…ew. I mean Britney should know better by now.

    Comment by mamatulip on July 2, 2008
  2. How about shaving her legs too? jeez

    We totally missed out on our usual Canada Day celebration, ironically, because we were too busy getting ready for the canadian invasion that is my mother-in-law.

    And I would have pulled over and picked that Alf up, he would be mine, and I would heart him!

    Comment by AJ on July 2, 2008
  3. Poor Britney…but wait, she did dress herself, didn’t she? But the South Park thing, that’s really gross. Funny, but gross.

    Mrs. Schmittys last blog post..New Blog!

    Comment by Mrs. Schmitty on July 2, 2008
  4. Ha ha, I had to laugh about the Alf thing. I constantly cry out “Oooh, ooh there’s a dead in the road!” only to find out it’s a plastic bag as we drive by it.

    Comment by Katie on July 2, 2008
  5. Okay, apparently when you put things in carrots in a comment, that takes your text away. That was supposed to read there’s a dead “insert animal name here” but oh well!

    Comment by Katie on July 2, 2008

    What kind of person are you?

    SciFi Dads last blog post..Quality Time

    Comment by SciFi Dad on July 2, 2008
  7. why don’t they leave brit alone seriously i don’t care if she wants to go commando so why is some pervert always trying to take beaver shots of her?…you did swerve to miss alf didn’t you?

    Comment by LAVENDULA on July 2, 2008
  8. PLEASE. Let’s NEVER talk about Spencer. HATE.

    Comment by Kristabella on July 2, 2008
  9. Britney and Brittany are spelled differently, but pronounced the same, so if your new phrase takes off, I’ll have to change my name.

    I better think of a good one!

    Britts last blog post..Did You Hear The Big News?

    Comment by Britt on July 2, 2008
  10. I feel bad for Britney’s britney… so overexposed.

    Sarahs last blog post..Summer Strawberry Cake

    Comment by Sarah on July 2, 2008
  11. Shooting Brit like that is just plain old wrong. Shame on the person who took that photo.

    Yet another reason I wear undies.

    And dude, you kid? Adorable.

    Kristies last blog post..I survived. Barely.

    Comment by Kristie on July 2, 2008
  12. Ew. Are those HER legs? Ew.

    I am still giggling out loud at “Hollywood Tuna.” Is there a better website name. Seriously?

    ohmommys last blog post..Lost in Translation

    Comment by ohmommy on July 2, 2008
  13. *sigh*

    She’s donig so well apaprently and they’re probably jsut trying to crack her into something that is exciting to the media.

    Also, Canada Day rocks I would choose to think.

    Comment by Mari on July 2, 2008
  14. OMG I have that exact chair! My mom and dad bought it at Canadian Tire and drug it up to Alaska so I can be Canadian in my backyard. I sit in it on 4th July to piss my husband off

    Beccas last blog post..Happy Canada Day

    Comment by Becca on July 2, 2008
  15. I have accepted the phrase as part of my vocabulary…although, I haven’t had much use for it yet. Come to think of it I may just use it in language emergencies. Hmmm…ya that didn’t make much sense. I’ll try harder next time.

    HRHs last blog post..Mr. PotatoCroc…

    Comment by HRH on July 2, 2008
  16. I feel bad for Britney. And her britney.

    Angellas last blog post..Honey Garlic Wings

    Comment by Angella on July 2, 2008
  17. Good Lord, are they still MAKING ALF DOLLS???????


    I am not sure what I would do if I were Britney (Other than wear some damn underwear around cameras) because I am still way too cowardly to get my bits waxed.

    Loralees last blog post..Kind of like Post Secret except you won’t have to make a card or spend money on a stamp. (And obviously, it’s not NEARLY as cool and awesome)

    Comment by Loralee on July 2, 2008
  18. My eyesight got so bad while I was pregnant that I was swerving out of the way of shadows. I swear. I tried not to drive much.

    And hey, good for your mini-Becks!

    kgirls last blog post..Surely These Were Born In The Depths Of Hell And Released Only To Torture Me For Unseen Wrongoings

    Comment by kgirl on July 2, 2008
  19. Brit has annoyed me since the whole whorey schoolgirl thing back in like, whatisitnow, 1998???

    Anywhoo, you made me chortle Diet Pep*si out of my nose 🙂

    Maternal Mirths last blog post..What is This and Where Did It Come From?

    Comment by Maternal Mirth on July 2, 2008
  20. You are so incredibly adorable.

    Also, she needs to shave her legs!

    Yay canada day!

    Misss last blog post..I’d rather live my life on the Z-list, than be a bitch

    Comment by Miss on July 2, 2008
  21. Ew to Brit brit and ew to that South Park pic. just EW!

    Comment by Haley-O on July 2, 2008
  22. Brit is disgusting these days. Truly. And I had that Alf doll as a child – it talked. LOL

    Smilfs last blog post..BOTB: Yoo hoo AF where are you?

    Comment by Smilf on July 2, 2008
  23. Is it lame that the child in my got a little excited simply seeing the word “Alf” written out for the first time in ages?

    Also, you totally need to work on getting your catchphrase out there. For years I tried to pimp out, “Who are you? Retardo Monetelban?” when someone said something dumb, but it never caught on. THEN…it showed up in a Mathew Perry movie. No one in the theater laughed though. Sigh.

    Mikes last blog post..PART TWO: The Amazing Story of Madeline Alices’ Birth!

    Comment by Mike on July 2, 2008
  24. I just want Britney to move to the island of lost celebrities! (you know this place…Demi Moore lived there for a while, all of the Back Street Boys live there) She needs the break…tell her to take the Olsen twins and Miley C. with her!

    Nap Wardens last blog post..City Livin’

    Comment by Nap Warden on July 2, 2008
  25. You know, as a Commando Queen myself, I should be more sympathetic. But what is she? An ape? I do not have hair there. And if I did, I would deal with it.

    slynnros last blog post..Effing people, ya know?

    Comment by slynnro on July 2, 2008
  26. I made the mistake of checking out the pics a few days ago. Unfortunately, some things you just can’t unsee.

    Chriss last blog post..Hidden Talents

    Comment by Chris on July 2, 2008
  27. Sounds like you had a good day yesterday.

    A followed the link to Britney. Why? Why? Not an image I need embedded in my brain! I agree that sticking a camera up her skirt is crossing the line.

    Teena in Torontos last blog post..Wednesday workout

    Comment by Teena in Toronto on July 2, 2008
  28. Ok. Seriously…underwear? Not all that uncomfortable. I don’t get why…if your lady bid-ness has already made its way around the tabloids, you don’t just slip on a pair? Even if it is just to walk around outside in…you know, like a raincoat, or something.
    Having HAD a wax before, I can see where she is coming from, that shit HURTS…grow it til you can braid it, if that is what you like…just wear a hair net.
    Poor Brit.

    Comment by jodi on July 2, 2008
  29. Gross, gross, gross.

    On a side note, how was The Hulk??? I interviewed your boyfriend two years ago by the way.

    Camels & Chocolates last blog post..The Land of the Midnight Sun

    Comment by Camels & Chocolate on July 6, 2008

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