so, i was going to talk to you about my Canada day yesterday…in which i spent 7 hours with my ass on a maple-leafed chair with a Tim Horton’s coffee in hand, watching my son play in a soccer tournament. all day.
we officially owe my son $11. we told him that he’d get a dollar for every time he kicked the ball. clearly, we don’t have a David Beckham on our hands…but he sure is cute…
anyway, i was also going to talk about the fact that i actually got my ass to a movie theater last night to see my boyfriend turn into this…
and i was going to talk about the roadkill i swerved as to not re-runover this morning, only to have it not be roadkill at all…it was a giant ALF stuffed animal. no, i’m not kidding. some child out there is probably really upset this morning; and some parent is probably smiling with glee.
but there’s something more pressing i need to talk about.
it’s Britney Spears.
yes. i have seen the most recent pictures of Britney Spears flashing her Britney.
(yes, it’s now become a phrase. i used it yesterday, and i’m using it again today. ‘flashing your britney’ is totally taking off. you heard it here first.)
yes, she REALLY needs to be waxed.
yes, if you REALLY need to see the pictures, they are here.
yes, i do believe that sometimes the girl asks for it.
yes, if you are a celebrity, you expect that you are going to have your picture taken when you are out (by people like me. ha!). and yes, if you are a celebrity you should learn how to gracefully get out of a car.
but, this time she was walking up some steps. and there was a photographer underneath, ready to capture her, well, her underneath.
and that is where i draw the line.
have you not seen the South Park? this is where she is headed…
i mean, sure it’s funny. but, really, it’s not funny at all.
(okay, stop laughing)
(for real, stop laughing)
seriously. the girl has enough troubles as it is. can we not just leave her the fuck alone? and go back to gossiping about the important stuff like Spencer Pratt vs Mary Kate Olsen, and how LARGE Matt Damon has gotten for his newest role? come on, people.