June 12 08

i think my barista is cheating me.

i swear.

they opened up a brand-new starbucks between my work and my house (perfect!) and every day time I’m in there i order the same exact thing. grande nonfat one splenda latte.

(i thought I’d be switching over for the summer to coffee frappuccino lites…but the first one i had this season was way too overblended and I’m completely turned off now. boo)

I’ve been drinking this same drink for years. solid. i know how it’s going to taste. 130 calories of coffee goodness. only recently, they’ve been more than just solid. they’ve been all kinds of awesome.

the 13-year-old girl behind the counter is definitely switching my splenda for sugar and my nonfat milk for homo milk. yes, that IS what they call it in Canada.

I’m convinced.

and then i went to a different Starbucks yesterday…and let’s just say..the latte? not nearly as awesome.

and then i found out that I’m not the only one!

according to OK! Magazine, a former barista from the West Village Starbucks was doing the exact. same. thing. to Mary Kate and Ashley Olsen. apparently “the barista thought the Olsens were too thin, so whenever they ordered their usual drink, he would replace skin milk with full-fat.”


  1. And that, ladies and gentlemen, is why I drink my coffee black. Nobody’s slipping nothing into my coffee without me knowing. 🙂

    SciFi Dads last blog post..CPC Revisited

    Comment by SciFi Dad on June 12, 2008
  2. That is hilarious! When I order decaf I often doubt what I’m getting.

    porters last blog post..

    Comment by porter on June 12, 2008
  3. Okay, that’s awful!! Who are they to project their opinions into your coffee?!?!

    Katies last blog post..Germany in Review

    Comment by Katie on June 12, 2008
  4. hahaha! baristas trying to fatten up their skinny customers…so umm if the americans don’t call homo milk homo what do they call it?

    Comment by LAVENDULA on June 12, 2008
  5. Lav – Americans call it whole milk. 🙂

    Comment by ali on June 12, 2008
  6. Homo milk? That’s funny! In Dutch we call it “Volle melk” which would translate into “Full milk”.

    Nadines last blog post..Don’t watch TV for one week, no matter what.

    Comment by Nadine on June 12, 2008
  7. Friggin crap! I didn’t want to spend my whole day with Beastie Boys stuck in my head!!

    When I see someone like one of the olson twins I always say, dang she needs a cookie. That’s hilarious someone was slipping them some calories on purpose. That guy is my hero for the day. lol

    Comment by AJ on June 12, 2008
  8. Oh my gosh, the same thing happens to me when I order Diet Coke at this drive-through drink place near my house… and since I’ve gained 4 pounds since moving back home – I’m convinced. Now I can never go back… What is these people’s problems, anyway?

    Sarahs last blog post..Will it Make Me a Millionaire?

    Comment by Sarah on June 12, 2008
  9. Fantastic. Now I’ll start ordering my lattes with full-fat milk. Maybe they’ll see the extra weight on my body and “secretly” switch me to skim.

    Thanks for the tip! 🙂

    Comment by Stacy on June 12, 2008
  10. That is too funny. I’m sure they do it so it tastes better and you keep going back, until you start gaining weight and figure it out…but I have noticed different Starbucks do taste different for other drinks too…hmmm gotta think about that!

    KathyMs last blog post..My bouncing baby boy

    Comment by KathyM on June 12, 2008
  11. I’ve noticed drinks taste different at different places to…I have started getting soy milk in mine though. Or did last time I was there…

    Maris last blog post..Links Times Three?

    Comment by Mari on June 12, 2008
  12. At least that should be a compliment, right? She thinks you’re too thin and need the full fat (HOMO, hahahahaha) milk.

    Camels & Chocolates last blog post..An Open Letter to Steve Jobs

    Comment by Camels & Chocolate on June 12, 2008
  13. I ditto the compliment – it’s because you’re SKINNNNNNYYYYYYY.

    But still. I’d be cheesed.

    And, um, what do they call Homo milk in the States?

    Angellas last blog post..My Sweetie Girl*

    Comment by Angella on June 12, 2008
  14. People do that with all kinds of stuff, like trying to give me diet soda instead of regular because they think I’m overweight so I should be ordering diet soda anyway. What’s with that?

    heathers last blog post..Shitty Credit Can Sometimes Be A Good Thing

    Comment by heather on June 12, 2008
  15. Well on a positive note…it’s nice that someone thinks your too skinny! 🙂

    Jennifers last blog post..The Suit of Motherhood

    Comment by Jennifer on June 12, 2008
  16. I had to forward your post to my husband to show him the picture of “homo milk” — I knew he’d laugh his butt off which doesn’t say much about the maturity of my almost-31-year-old husband, does it?

    She Likes Purples last blog post..Things And Stuff

    Comment by She Likes Purple on June 12, 2008
  17. Oh damn. that’s not fair. you think you’re being good and then find someone is trying to sabotage your diet & it’s not even you!!! very unfair.

    lol.. we call it full milk here in new zealand.

    Comment by Bronnie on June 12, 2008
  18. the title of this post reminds me of a very fun lollapoolza back in my youth.

    Homo milk? i would have a problem serving this to my children. i would be laughing too hard.

    gorillabunss last blog post..glowing like a glow worm

    Comment by gorillabuns on June 12, 2008
  19. Okay. You look just like her. Ohmyheck. So you must look too thin as well? You deserve extra ‘homo’ milk, don’t we all?

    Hey, contest today at my place.

    Good&Crazys last blog post..Blogroll revisited.

    Comment by Good&Crazy on June 12, 2008
  20. I am a newbie to coffee. I would have NO FREAKING CLUE if they “Tinkered” with my drink.

    But then, I use EIGHT Splendas and a vat of half and half in my large coffee.

    (And I will NOT put it in while anyone else is watching because I know how gross this is to most coffee drinkers.)

    Man. Now I have spilled my coffee secret to the world via your blog.

    I almost feel like we should hug or something.

    Loralees last blog post..Whatev…

    Comment by Loralee on June 12, 2008
  21. I wouldn’t worry unless you start to feel the ruffie.

    The Over-Thinkers last blog post..This one’s for Lucy.

    Comment by The Over-Thinker on June 12, 2008
  22. The other day I got a Java Chip Frapp Lite. It came with whipped cream. I was all “Dude, this is not light. There is whipped cream.” And he apologized and then totally just scraped off the whip and put in another cup. It was completely obv. ANGER.

    slynnros last blog post..Oh Dear.

    Comment by slynnro on June 12, 2008
  23. What ELSE would one call Homogenized milk? Just because my husband and I snicker like a pair of 10 year olds doesn’t mean there’s anything funny about it….

    Rebeccas last blog post..Gardens at Night

    Comment by Rebecca on June 12, 2008
  24. So… your barista’s a cheaty little monkey!? HA! you gotta watch those barista’s like a HAWK. See Starbucks tells them to put in the good stuff so we’ll keep coming back for more more MORE! I think they put OTHER STUFF in the drinks, too, but that’s another story…!!!

    Haley-Os last blog post..13 Celebrity Beauty Secrets!

    Comment by Haley-O on June 12, 2008
  25. For your fraps–
    Try asking them to blend it with extra ice. I find it makes a big difference!

    Comment by NEWMOM on June 12, 2008
  26. Really? That is so weird. Shouldn’t they just make what the customer wants regardless of their appearance and weight. Anyway, when Rhumba was still available in our local starbucks, I used to order it as often as I like. I love blended and fatty drinks and so far, they all taste the same to me. Haven’t heard any barista cheating here anyhow.

    Homo milk must be derived from Homogeneous, methinks. 😀

    Yvies last blog post..Wordless Wednesday (v.2) : Super Adley

    Comment by Yvie on June 12, 2008
  27. I’m not into coffee but I love love love their pastries!

    Teena in Torontos last blog post..Toronto FC

    Comment by Teena in Toronto on June 12, 2008
  28. OK, that is hilarious.

    miguelinas last blog post..The movies

    Comment by miguelina on June 12, 2008
  29. We call homo milk just regular milk, and then there’s the nonfat and 1 percent.

    To me, it’s hilarious when they meddle with the Olson twins, but just wrong to do it to the general public. Honestly, I always ask twice to assure my frapps are light. Just to make sure.

    beths last blog post..Update

    Comment by beth on June 13, 2008
  30. […] « i’m telling y’all it’s a sabotage […]

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  31. Your Starbucks puts the Splenda in for you??? We have to do it ourselves.

    And that’s why I go to Dunkin Donuts, because for half the price, they put the cream and sugar in for you.

    Kristabellas last blog post..I Am Drunk

    Comment by Kristabella on June 13, 2008
  32. There is a barista at a Starbucks by my old job. If I went in and saw that it was him, I would get the drink I like. He made it so strong it was disgusting! There is a really good barista in the Starbucks in our Target. Her drinks are the best!

    Comment by Ruby on June 14, 2008
  33. I would like to apologize for the mess that my last comment was. Apparantley taking care of my sick son all day has zapped my brain!

    I meant to say that there was a barista by my old job that made the drinks WAY to strong! If I saw it was him I would get something different.

    There. That’s what I meant!

    Comment by Ruby on June 14, 2008
  34. So maybe the barista is saying you are too thin! Tip her well!

    Dis last blog post..This is a crock!!!

    Comment by Di on June 14, 2008
  35. Oh…and I think it’s so cute when you blend the Canadian (Homo milk?) and the Southern (Y’all), Shug!

    Dis last blog post..This is a crock!!!

    Comment by Di on June 14, 2008
  36. They totally do what they want with your drinks. I can’t have caffeine or milk so I always ask for decaff and soy. There are so many times I can tell that they didn’t listen because I’ll be shaking and near vomitting. ugh!

    Comment by BlondeBlogger on June 15, 2008
  37. I’m a Grande NonFat Misto girl myself, and MANY times I would swear that the milk is NOT nonfat.

    nomotherearths last blog post..French Braids

    Comment by nomotherearth on June 15, 2008
  38. Honestly, I think it was hilarious that you found your frapp to be over-blended, when I was just at a website where the burning question of the day was “What do you do when you frapp is too chunky, ask them to reblend it or walk away?”

    I am a starbucks barista, in the busiest (and unfortunately the smallest) store in my district. And I REALLY wish all of you guys could spend sometime working in a starbucks before you complain. I hate this bullshit about “Oh I think my barista is purposely making my drink with whole (or homo for you) instead of nonfat!” Honestly, the only reasons why a barista would make your drink wrong on purpose is either: a.) you were a bitch (and I mean a BIG bitch) or because they were in a bad mood and just didn’t care about you drink. Other reasons may be someone steamed whole milk in the nonfat pitcher and forgot. As far someone giving you another milk when you ask for soy or caffine when you ask for decaf, I know that I NEVER do that because that could really make someone sick, not to mention it is very easy to taste the difference between normal milk and soy. If you ask for your frapp lite and it comes with whip, that doesn’t mean that your drink wasn’t lite, usually it means that the barista topping the drink (cause in my store one person blends, one person tops and hands out) didn’t read the cup right. And I’m sorry if I don’t see the big deal in scrapping off whip cream, I mean honestly, are we that high maintenance that we need the frapp remade? I get that starbucks is expensive, but I and any other barista at your local starbucks can’t do a damn thing about it. We have no control over the prices what so ever. If you really think we’re making your drinks wrong, consider the fact that we get complaints and yelled at all day that we would rather make your drink right and get you to leave and not come back to remake it then to purposely make the drink wrong out of spite.
    I may have just wasted my breath, but in case I didn’t, I’ll end with saying this: Baristas work for very low pay and even lower appreciation. I have probably been told that I’ve made a wonderful drink a handful of times even though I do my best to make the drink perfect everytime. We understand it’s expensive and yes, your drink should be perfect. But that doesn’t mean you have to rude or to look down to us as if we are stupid. A little appreciation goes a long way. My tip, if you really think your drink is made incorrectly or you know it has been made incorrectly, POLITELY say “I don’t mean to be rude, but my drink to taste different/funny/is too hot/cold/sweet/bitter or whatever. Do you mind to remake it?” I understand if you are upset, but by being calm and polite, not only will your drink get remade, you may get a coupon for free drink as well.

    Comment by Sorry Guys on July 4, 2008
  39. […] when i have nothing to do, i prove to my husband that my scale is deliberately fucking with my brain. just like my baristas. […]

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