I am not a big costume person. In fact, I don’t even remember the last time I wore a costume on purpose.
And I don’t count that time I put on Emily’s Lady Gaga costume and took a picture in my bathroom mirror.
(Somewhat because Isabella thought it was Nanny McPhee.)
(Mostly because I looked like a fool.)
So, somewhat unfortunately for me (and you too! Hey, if I have to suffer, we all have to suffer), at the end of the month I will be attendingÂ a little event called BlissdomÂ and it requires that I wear a costume. So, I tossed out a few simple ideas that required little-to-no work on my part, because, in the interest of full disclosure, I have having a hell of a time right now.
I am drowning.Â
It happens to me sometimes, especially in September. September marks the beginning of a new school year and seven days of Jewish holidays, including Yom Kippur and an at-least 10 hour each way road trip to Milwaukee. So, in addition to getting back into new morning and bedtime routines and the return of making school lunches and carting my kids to and from school and making new friends and meeting new parents and planning new playdates, and the addition of new extra-curricularsâ€”skating, hip hop, hockey, swimmingâ€”we have lots of huge family meals, lots of company, lots of cooking, lots of eating, lots of being social.
And lots of time spent off of work. And this is a busy time at work, too. Not that there’s really any time of year that is not busy at work. (Not that I am complaining about being busy. Busy = employment = happyAli) But with Thanksgiving and Halloween right around the corner, I am working hard on those, and Christmas and the holidays are not far from my mind and pitches are flooding my gmail and I currently have an embarrassing number of unread messages in both of my email inboxes.
And then there are the appointments. Dentist with the kids, eye doctor with the kids, haircuts for the kids. I had to get fitted for a mouth guard, I have to get a crown on a tooth in my mouth that is literally crumbling to pieces, and then I have to have some crown lengthening done so that I can get another crown (Read: $$). I have to go to the allergist to find out once-and-for-all if this nut allergy is indeed a real nut allergy or it’s nothing (“Mrs. Martell, expect to spend at least two and a half hours in our office.”)
And then there’s all the other stuff. The workouts. The 5k runs. Taking Emily to auditions. Preparing Emily for auditions. The photo shoots. The photo editing. The pleasing (and never pleasing) of photo customers. The Breaking Amish sleuthing. The obligations. The drama with friends. The decision to finally get Isabella to stop pronouncing picture as pitcher because it drives my poor ears batty. The possibility of having to get rid of some dead weight in my life. The personalÂ stuff.
Every time I start to surface, I get close, and then, BAM, I get pulled back under.
I knew I should have take more swimming lessons as a kid.Â
All this is to say that having to figure out a costume for a costume party is not something I have time or energy for these days.
So, I came up with the perfect (and easy!) costume idea that I may or may not have stolen from my daughter.
(Not the daughter who I am considering dressing as “Stringer Bella.”)
I have the silver medal. And the white scrunchy. And the black pants. And the flowers. And THE FACE.
Now, if only this stupid gray podium jacket didn’t cost $359.97.
Ali Â is not impressed.Â