****Edits below! and a picture!****
if you know anything and me and the husband, you’ll know that we are quite different. i’m a “let’s try to please everyone” kind of person while the husband is more of a “let’s do what’s good for us” kind of guy. you want to eat dinner at 8:30 instead of 7? that’s cool by me. might not be my first choice, but i don’t care. i like to eat. doesn’t matter when. you want to see the new Brad Pitt instead of the new Indie? that’s cool by me. again, not my first choice, but i don’t care. It’s just for me, at the end of the day, i’m happy to be with my friends. i’d rather not speak up and go with the flow. it’s how i am, it’s how i’ll always be.
now, i’ll tell you right up front that neither one of these ways is ideal. there has to be some sort of balance between always compromising and not compromising at all. we just haven’t found it yet.
this morning i took Emily to the husband’s cousin’s bat mitzvah party. it was all-girls’ pizza and scrapbooking party. a far cry from the dinner-and-dance-catered-with-a-band bat-mitzvah that my Emily will likely have, but it was nice. and Emily had a blast. tonight we are planning to hang out with our friends (another 2 couples in that friends-for-life category) and they called to say they were serving pizza. now, my husband, who was looking out for me, and who had the best intentions, asked if there were any other choices, since i had said i would prefer not to have pizza for the second meal in a row.
now, i don’t know if i should have, since sometimes i get angry inappropriately.
but i was upset because if anyone had asked me, i would have said that pizza was fine. yes, not my first choice, not by a long shot. but, if it was going to make everyone else in the equation happy, i was certainly more than willing to go along with it. not my first choice…but i like pizza….i’m sure i would enjoy it.
so, i said, not-so-politely, that if they now changed their minds for me and ordered something else, i would be really upset. putting the husband in a catch-22. he’s damned if he does and he’s damned if he doesn’t. i just don’t like the idea that if this was the plan…that they changed it for me. “oh…we have to have sushi because of Ali”. “Ali didn’t want pizza so we are stuck paying an arm and a leg for sushi…and i don’t even like sushi”. see…these are the reactions i don’t want. there are 5 other people eating…why should they change their plans for me?
am i completely and totally off my rocker…or are there other people out there who can commiserate with me??
nowÃ‚Â the husband’s upset with me. he’s all huffy and non-verbal…which is his fighting style. mine, my friends, is not. i don’t stop talking when i’m mad at him, i start yelling (a curse that i inherited from my mother) and i was to fight it out. not ignore each other and act like babies.
ah, good times, i tell you. good times 🙂
i’ll update y’all in the morning…if i haven’t gone crazy and shaved my head first…
****so…all is good in the world, there was no head shaving for me. in a very diplomatic move, our friends got BOTH pizza and sushi, covering all their bases. see…those are true friends 🙂
also…my kid is obsessed with blackberries. she is constantly on the phone “hi Noah!” the bow is there just because i got it to stay. i didn’t go as far as Anna and use Karo syrup to make it stick…but i’m getting quite annoyed with people who think she’s a boy. especially when she wears all pink.