March 17 05

because it certainly isn’t mine.

i visited my OB yesterday for my 20 week appointment. yes, we are halfway there folks! halfway! yay! Sometimes i think that these appointments are a real waste of my time. But, mostly, i thank my lucky stars that this is my third rather routine pregnancy and that i’ve had no concerns or problems.

i waited 45 minutes for him to come back from a c-section. weight, urine, blood pressure, heartbeat. that’s it. and for the record, i’ve gained 9 pounds total, my urine is fine, blood pressure was low, and the heartbeat was high. goodbye, Dr. R, see you in a month.

last night i spent a lengthy amount of time in front of my mirror, trying on clothes that are way too tight to wear. the giant basoomas are turning my shirts into belly shirts (a big no-no in my books), so most of these are now unwearable.

i kept inspecting body parts. the boobs. not mine – they are on loan from a strip club somewhere. the face. someone told me last week that it’s starting to fill out. could there be any worse of a thing to say? she’s now on my hit list. my thighs, arms, back, etc. these are not mine. i don’t know whose they are….but i hope they come back for them soon, cuz i no longer want them. the ass. still looks okay to me. thank the lord i still have something…

i think i’m going to have a problem for the next 4 1/2 months. help.


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