January 25 08

i came back from Atlanta after Chrismukah weighing 5 pounds less than i did the day i gave birth to my first-born. no, i’m not exaggerating. FIVE pounds. yeesh. so, i took the lard-ass by storm and gave up the cakesters

mmm…cakesters…

and headed to the beach.

mostly because in 6 weeks i’m heading to the other beach

and i’m going to have to, erm, actually put my ass into a bathing suit.  and, erm, actually wear it. in front of people. who i know.

so..on south beach i went. but, i didn’t really. because south beach doesn’t work for me. i did it once before and watched in horror as the husband lost 14 pounds and i lost NOTHING. so,  i put my own little twist on it.

things allowed on south beach diet phase 1:

things allowed on ali beach diet phase 1:

see? you are already liking my diet, aren’t you? seriously, though, i decided to eat mostly low fat meats, low fat cheeses, whole grain breads and vegetables. heaps of vegetables. (hello…you can just call me Gas-ious Clay. sex-ay!) but, i still allow myself the things i enjoy. like cookie dough.

and i’ve lost and kept off 9 pounds.

which means, i MAY actually be able to wear a bikini on the beach next month. maybe. but either way, i need a new bathing suit. and this is where your choose-your-own-ali-adventure begins (don’t say you didn’t read those books because i KNOW you did…and you loved ‘em)…do any of these strike your fancy?

..ahem…the suits…not the models…because yeah, they aren’t exactly going to look like this on me

since y’all begged and pleaded so nicely…

come over and say at Juice today…it’s Friday Smackdown day..my favorite day of the week, because we get to poke fun of things like this…

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  1. First so jealous you’re going to the beach! And I like the first and third bathing suits. :) Let us know which one you decide on. Did you ever pick out a new pair of books?

    Mandi’s last blog post..Beauty

    [Reply]

    Comment by Mandi on January 25, 2008
  2. WTF? You know what those things hanging off her shoulders look like? Have you seen cars or trucks that have “balls” hanging from them? THAT’s what they look like~ haaaaaaaaaaaaaa

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    Comment by Kristi on January 25, 2008
  3. I like suit #1. Thanks for posting the hat pic, you look gorgeous dahling!

    Mom On The Run’s last blog post..Rockin’ The Meme

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    Comment by Mom On The Run on January 25, 2008
  4. First of all, the blonde model’s boobs are distractingly HUGE, and the other model appears to have two radically different sized boobs. Boobs aside, my 5-year-old likes the last two pictured. I like the solid black, myself.

    JMC’s last blog post..Art assignment

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    Comment by JMC on January 25, 2008
  5. I like all of them, and I think 2 and 4 will look really good.

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    Comment by anne nahm on January 25, 2008
  6. I like the first bikini and the all-black tankini..
    btw .. totally jealous that you lost 9 lbs, in what .. 4 wks .. that is awesome..

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    Comment by Sarah on January 25, 2008
  7. I like the first suit the best – congrats on the 9 lbs!

    Don Mills Diva’s last blog post..How did you know I had nothing?

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    Comment by Don Mills Diva on January 25, 2008
  8. I like the brown and teal one and also the brown and white one.
    Don’t go with black. I always go with black and it’s boring.
    After I have this baby can you please send me all the details of your cookie dough diet? Yum yum.

    LD’s last blog post..Monster Baby

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    Comment by LD on January 25, 2008
  9. Oh, number 1……pick number 1!

    Seriously, cookie dough???

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    Comment by krissy on January 25, 2008
  10. 1. Hot
    2-4. Not

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    Comment by Giblet on January 25, 2008
  11. Personally, I would choose any of the last three… I prefer a little more coverage. I think the last one is my favourite.

    LoriD’s last blog post..Repressed high school memory. Until now.

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    Comment by LoriD on January 25, 2008
  12. Number one is smokin’ but I’m liking the all black tankini the best.

    And you know I am hating you. I have been on that cookie dough diet and I have NOT seen those results! What’s that you say? You eat other things, too? Well crap. No wonder I’m looking like the puffy little guy on the package.

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    Comment by AJ on January 25, 2008
  13. hi Ali i liked the one that was brown and white it sorta looks like toile…..have fun at the beach….

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    Comment by LAVENDULA on January 25, 2008
  14. Hey! I found your site through browsing friends links! I really like the first suite. Very cute. And good luck with the diet, I need to get my butt to the gym!

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    Comment by Meagan on January 25, 2008
  15. Love 3…hides all vacation sins!

    Clink’s last blog post..Is It Wrong??

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    Comment by Clink on January 25, 2008
  16. [...] to eat mostly low fat meats, low fat cheeses, whole grain breads and …article continues at ali brought to you by diet.medtrials.info and [...]

    Pingback by   the beach for the beach by diet.MEDtrials.info on January 25, 2008
  17. I like all of the suits!

    Your modified diet is how I eat all year round. I spent too many years of my life being the “Big Girl”, so I have to be careful all the time.

    And yes, THE GAS! Graham is often heard asking, “What’s that smell?”

    Angella’s last blog post..Wordless Whenever: In The Window Seat (Outtakes Included)

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    Comment by Angella on January 25, 2008
  18. I like the first two tankinis. :D

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    Comment by Mari on January 25, 2008
  19. I just met you and I already don’t like you! I so want to go to the beach…ahhhh!!! (All in good fun, my dear!)

    I love the second one! Great colors and if you’re feeling a bit, not quite there, go for the last one. Very chic! I still have a few months before loading my butt into a suit! At least I have that one you! : )

    Have fun choosing!

    Amy’s last blog post..Even with the sun shining…it’s stinkin’ cold!!

    [Reply]

    Comment by Amy on January 25, 2008
  20. I like the 1st suit and the 4th suit.

    I went to the Sandals Grande St. Lucia in September for two weeks for my honeymoon and it was fantastic! You’re going to have a great time!

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    Comment by Lottifish on January 25, 2008
  21. I like the print tankini and love the hat.

    Shan’s last blog post..dear maya

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    Comment by Shan on January 25, 2008
  22. Bathing suit number one for sure ! I wish I could dream of having such cleavage….

    I disagree with the tankini theory, at least for me. The place that is open is where all my fat will squish out anyway. So why not just make it even all over ?

    [Reply]

    Comment by Heather on January 25, 2008
  23. Congrats on the 9 lbs, that’s awesome!
    I say go with #1 or #2–may as well go all the way ;)

    Multi-tasking Mommy’s last blog post..Isn’t she just so cute?

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    Comment by Multi-tasking Mommy on January 25, 2008
  24. Hey Ali:

    #1 for sure! Tankini’s are too mom-ish. :)

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    Comment by Wendi on January 25, 2008
  25. Hey Ali:

    #1 for sure! Tankini’s are too mom-ish. :)

    [Reply]

    Comment by Wendi on January 25, 2008
  26. OOOO the beach & cookie dough! I like the 2nd one & the last one I’m a sucker for sparklies!

    Oh. PS: I like the new hat and scarf set! I need a new hat!

    Lindsay’s last blog post..I need some advice!

    [Reply]

    Comment by Lindsay on January 25, 2008
  27. Suit #1 and the all black… and WTF is that attacking Lucy Liu?

    Aimee Greeblemonkey’s last blog post..What happens when you get nominated for a big award…

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    Comment by Aimee Greeblemonkey on January 25, 2008
  28. Cakesters. Huh. Still haven’t tried those.

    Chris Cactus’s last blog post..The Weeklies #20

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    Comment by Chris Cactus on January 25, 2008
  29. does the bikini come with them, because i like them all!!!

    [Reply]

    Comment by aaron on January 25, 2008
  30. I like #1. I just love brown and blue together….

    Haley-O’s last blog post..Monkey Sleep Monkey No Eat

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    Comment by Haley-O on January 25, 2008
  31. I like the plain black tankini. But, damn, I wish I was looking that hot in a bathing suit.

    Kristie’s last blog post..How to get fab abs.

    [Reply]

    Comment by Kristie on January 25, 2008
  32. I like the brown & white one, but that’s just because I am looking at those itty bitty low-rise bottoms on the other choices & I would spend all day worrying that my butt crack was showing. =P And I haven’t even had a baby. Ever.

    Dawn’s last blog post..Sing Along: January 25, 2008

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    Comment by Dawn on January 25, 2008
  33. LOVE the last swimsuit. Pick it. Plus halter style tops make gals look even skinnier.

    Queen of Shake Shake’s last blog post..Peach and Brown

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    Comment by Queen of Shake Shake on January 25, 2008
  34. I like the teal and brown one. And I hate you for fitting into it!! ;)

    Tara’s last blog post..?

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    Comment by Tara on January 25, 2008
  35. I really like the fourth suit. It was hard to pick, because all I could do at first was critique the model’s poses. Too much ANTM. Too much.

    Chris’s last blog post..Perfect…

    [Reply]

    Comment by Chris on January 25, 2008
  36. I like the black on eiwth the white border. Where are they from? I may get one from myself…..

    Jenn

    Jenn’s last blog post..3 Great Things

    [Reply]

    Comment by Jenn on January 25, 2008
  37. I really like #s 1 and 4. And seriously, they will probably look better without the giant jugs inside.

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    Comment by Anna on January 25, 2008
  38. I honestly can’t comment on the first 4 suits because her boobs are just WAAAAY TOOOO BIIIIG. She actually makes the suits look BAD because they’re so big (not to mention FA-AKE).

    Kat’s last blog post..The Most Important Video You Will Watch This Year

    [Reply]

    Comment by Kat on January 25, 2008
  39. i love the first suit best, mostly because of the cute little belt on the bottoms. my second choice would be the last one. :)

    Lara’s last blog post..Let Me ‘Splain

    [Reply]

    Comment by Lara on January 25, 2008
  40. Gob-bless Victoria’s Secret, except for in January. I like your diet, yes I do. I can never get into diets that require me to read a book.

    Lindz’s last blog post..Unfullfilled

    [Reply]

    Comment by Lindz on January 26, 2008
  41. I love the tan zebra stripe, I actually put that on my wish list a few days ago! Great taste you have! What beach are you going to? From the picture it almost looks like a Sandals Resort I was at.

    [Reply]

    Comment by Unnaturally Blonde on January 27, 2008
  42. Bwaahahaha!

    I never had me a cakester but you make them sound awful good.

    the new girl’s last blog post..Because I Love A Pig In Sunglasses

    [Reply]

    Comment by the new girl on January 27, 2008
  43. Go for the black tankini w/black and white trim in the last photo. Sexy, slimming, and won’t make you look like you’re aiming to be a teenager again. (a comment made to me by my teen when I tried on a bikini last summer) :)

    celticbuffy’s last blog post..A job well done along with golden silence

    [Reply]

    Comment by celticbuffy on January 28, 2008
  44. #1 is my vote. The blue would be nice with your fair tones. I hope you let us know which one you end up buying (we won’t insist on a photo, don’t worry). Swimsuit buying is torture…anyone else on board with that theory?

    [Reply]

    Comment by Theoda on January 29, 2008
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