The following events took place in Toronto between 5pm and 7:25pm on Wednesday, June 8th, 2011.
I can vouch for the authenticity of the words you are about to read. I would read this aloud in a courtroom, under oath.
Ali gets on the subway at Queen Street, going north on the Yonge line towards Finch station.
The subway stops at Dundas, then College, then Wellesley, then Bloor.
The doors close at Bloor, leaving a subway full of sweaty people waiting for it to move towards Rosedale. The doors open and some more people get on. The doors close. The doors open again and some more people get on. The doors close.
“Attention passengers on the Yonge-University-Spadina line. We are experiencing some mechanical issues. We have crew members on scene and we should be on our way in a few minutes.”
The doors open again and some more people get on.
“Attention passengers on the Yonge-University-Spadina line. This train in now out of service. Please exit the train.”
About 100 people de-train to stand in the hot Bloor station and wait for the next train.
The next train comes and Ali gets trampled to the ground and then sweaty-sandwiched between several people.
- Clowns to the left of me.
- Jokers to the right.
The subway makes it two stops to Summerhill.
“Attention passengers on the Yonge-University-Spadina line. We have a medical emergency in car 4. We are going to stop here and send some crew members over. Hopefully it will be cleared up shortly and we can be on our way. We thank you for your patience.”
Ali gets off the train at Summerhill because she can’t breathe and she is fairly certainly that there is a wiener of unknown origin sticking into her back.
The original train goes before Ali has a chance to get back on.
There is no way Ali is getting back in that train.
A new train comes by. It’s too full for Ali to get on.
Another new train comes by. It’s too full for Ali to get on.
Another train comes by. It’s too full for Ali to get on.
Ali finally gets on the 4th train, squeezing in beside a man with THE HOT DOG BURPS.
Ali holds back many, many tears.
The train makes it to Davisville and then stops. And doesn’t move again.
Ali finally gets to Finch station, after never having gotten a seat on the subway.
Ali drives through a lightning-and-thunder storm and finally pulls into her driveway sometime after 7:15pm.
Ali cries. Because she remembers that she has to do this all over again tomorrow.
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