June 16 10

Josh: Wanna know something freaky, Mommy?

Me: Always.

Josh: Well, so, you know how god is invisible AND he’s everywhere?

Me: ….

Josh: Well, so he could be sitting right here next to me in the car. And I wouldn’t even know.

Isabella: Maybe you could hear him breathing. Quick, everyone be really, really quiet. Maybe he’s next to me. OR, maybe he is ON my nose!

Josh: Maybe he is INSIDE your nose, and every time you pick your boogers you are picking little pieces of him.

Isabella: Don’t be gross Josh.

Josh: Hey, Mommy? If god is invisible, how do we know that he is a he?

Me: Maybe he isn’t. Maybe he is Alanis Morissette.

Josh: Who?

Me: Never mind. You were saying?

Josh: Well, my teacher TOLD me to put a beard on him when I was drawing him, so I just assumed he was a man, and not, you know, a bearded lady like in the circus. But, maybe my teacher was wrong and maybe god is a lady.

Isabella: God is a not a man. Or a lady.

Josh: But how do you know?

Isabella: Because I have seen him.

Me: …..

Josh: Wha?

Isabella: Mommy, REMEMBER, he is a scary burny man bush.

Me: *giggles* (she said scary burny man bush)

Isabella: IT IS NOT FUNNY.

Me: I wasn’t laughing at you, babe. Yes, I remember your nightmares.

Isabella: Thanks a lot, Josh. Now I’m going to be afraid all day that a scary bush is in my nose and is going to start talking to me at camp. You are the best brother ever.

Josh: I know, right?



  1. Hey – what kid hasn’t thought this – “Maybe he is INSIDE your nose, and every time you pick your boogers you are picking little pieces of him.

    ROTFL! Awesome.
    The prince of egypt scares me too.


    Comment by monstergirlee on June 16, 2010
  2. Sometimes I regret our decision to not baptize our kids and raise them Catholic.


    Comment by SciFi Dad on June 16, 2010
  3. Your kids have way more intellectual conversations than I have most days.


    Comment by Kristabella on June 16, 2010
  4. Your kids are as hilarious as mine are. I really do hope we get them all together one day.

    (Josh and Graham are like twins.)


    Comment by Angella on June 16, 2010
  5. ahaha, your children make me giggle. I love their conversations. Maybe they should have their own Disney show.


    Comment by Katie on June 16, 2010
  6. that is the best kid conversation ever! Glad you documented it appropriately.


    Comment by designHER Momma on June 16, 2010
  7. I need to visit again.


    Comment by slynnro on June 16, 2010
  8. I just spit out my cereal at burning man bush.


    Comment by heather... on June 16, 2010
  9. Apparently I’m going to giggle about burning man bush every damn time I read it or say it in my head.



    Comment by Pgoodness on June 16, 2010
  10. our conversations usually go as such:

    sissy? God is far too important to find your bunny.

    sissy? God is playing with Thalon and is very disappointed in you being mean to me.

    sissy? God like me better.


    Comment by gorillabuns on June 16, 2010
  11. Pretty much the best conversation ever. And you’re right – Cristina is a little frightening.


    Comment by Chris on June 17, 2010
  12. Sounds like you need to bust out the old VHS to show them that God has long hair, female, yet strangely androgynous.


    Comment by MommaCort on June 17, 2010
  13. I asked my mom where the table was in my stomach… since apcparently God lives inside us, and I was very concerned about where he ate dinner.


    Comment by Brooke on June 17, 2010
  14. [...] in high school. It’s about your first kiss. It’s about you, at 16. It’s about finding God inside of your nose. It’s about bucket lists—someday, but not [...]

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  15. [...] It’s also not the first time I name dropped Alanis Morissette to try to avoid answering tough questions. [...]

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  16. I love your kids…I just…love them. I want you all to just come live with me.


    Comment by Jen on July 19, 2012
  17. Scary burn-y man bush? GOD IS FROM JERSEY SHORE????


    Comment by Nuala Reilly on July 19, 2012

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