June 6 08

it sure is a sweet face, isn’t it?

well..that sweet face just got himself kicked out of his soccer practice.

for reals.

I’ve always told anyone that Josh is, by far, my easiest child. with Emily, there’s all the DRAMA. the politics. the too-old-for-her-size crap. (have i mentioned the makeup that my nanny bought for her???) with Isabella, she’s young. and because she’s young, she’s tough. she whines and cries and demands a lot of attention. and a lot of sippy cups filled with chocolate milk. and doesn’t nap when she should. and naps when she shouldn’t.

Joshie is laid back. and quiet. and sweet. and my god does he love his mama. he’s happy to sit and play xbox or wii or read a book with the husband or play mastermind with me or play lego with his sister. EASY. bedtime? easy. bathtime? easy. mealtime? with the exception of the MESS, easy.

until now.

my sweet little boy is gone. and in his place? a stranger. and not the Billy Joel kind either. one who doesn’t listen to anyone. who i have to literally, physically drag out of basketball practice every week. who i have to pick up from birthday parties and hear that he decided to paint his entire face with cake icing because he didn’t like that the cake was girlie (sorry again, Blacks!). who i have to hear say things to me like “me no like it” me no like it? what? he’s FIVE! who throws a shitfit when i put him to bed every night. who gives me hell when i want to feed him his favorite foods. who takes 45 minutes to put his shoes on.

who gets kicked out of soccer practice for being a total loon.

i know. he looks all innocent (and strangely studly). but he’s a BEAST.

(also…please don’t talk to me judge me about the pacifier. it’s getting tossed the day she turns 3. august 15th. i’m counting down the days)

how do i get my boy back???

HELP! help me not want to drop-kick all 35 pounds of him across the room. please.

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  1. Hmm.. wait two years .. it gets much better when they are seven :0). Seriously, what crime could he do to get kicked out of soccer???
    my neice had her pacy t’il 3 as well, she’s 10 and no worse the wear, teeth fine and no lasting effects lol

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    Comment by sarah on June 6, 2008
  2. I must admit to being curious about what he did to get kicked out of soccer too. I mean, this is the sport that features hooligans, right? My goodness, what could he have done that even they found unacceptable?!?

    As for ideas? Ask him. Try and catch him in a (somewhat) decent mood… say when he’s just finished a level in Lego Indy… and ask him why he’s being so different. Offer up yourself as the sacrificial lamb for blame (i.e. did Mommy do something?) and see where it goes. You might just learn what triggered the change.

    SciFi Dads last blog post..All That Matters

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    Comment by SciFi Dad on June 6, 2008
  3. Oh, and who’s the beast of burden?

    SciFi Dads last blog post..All That Matters

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    Comment by SciFi Dad on June 6, 2008
  4. My son loved his pacifier. He wasn’t allowed to have it anywhere but in bed, so you never saw a child want to go to bed so badly! He was like a smoker taking that first drag!!!

    Rory handed his pacifier (which he inexplicably called his Wo-Wo) to the pediatric dentist when he was about 3 after she lectured him about his teeth.

    Dis last blog post..Why golf?

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    Comment by Di on June 6, 2008
  5. I’m curious here too about why he got the boot. No worries on the paci, my daughter still has hers too and I’m dreading the day we have to part with it.

    KathyMs last blog post..One on one time

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    Comment by KathyM on June 6, 2008
  6. so not judging the pacifier thing, my little one turns 3 on 5/5 and LOVES it also, she isn’t allowed to take it out of the house at this point (mama’s not proud, mmmk?). she’s my third, and hey when you get to number 3 your lucky to get them fed :)

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    Comment by mamma knows on June 6, 2008
  7. oops her b-day is 8/5, SEE what I mean with #3, good GOD!

    mamma knowss last blog post..devil dog.

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    Comment by mamma knows on June 6, 2008
  8. My friends son had a binky until he was 4. When he woke up on his 4th birthday, she told him they were all going in the trash. So the family gathered them up and they went out and threw them in the trash. He asked for it for a day or 2 but quickly got over it.

    What did he do to get the boot from soccer??

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    Comment by Ruby on June 6, 2008
  9. Maybe when he’s 10?

    I’m sure it is just a phase. Hopefully a short one.

    Kristabellas last blog post..I’ve Haven’t Complained About The Heat In Awhile

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    Comment by Kristabella on June 6, 2008
  10. We just got our little one off the binky a month ago and she is 3! At her 3rd birthday we started by only giving it to her at nap and bed. Then she stopped napping and one night at bed she did not ask for it. So we threw them all away. Our pediatric dentist said as long as it is gone by 4 it is not a problem.

    Kellys last blog post..Muffuletta

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    Comment by Kelly on June 6, 2008
  11. We’ve been through the same thing with our boy, too. I think it’s fairly standard-issue boy behaviour. One way we coped was to REALLY increase the amount of time his dad spent with him, and have his dad do a lot of the disciplining. It worked, rather magically.

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    Comment by Rebecca on June 6, 2008
  12. I don’t know about Josh b/c little d is still 3…but I got rid of the paccy just before his 3rd birthday – by using this on every paccy http://www.amazon.com/Liquid-S.....B000LPLISW

    He was done with them forever after just one evening.

    Cristans last blog post..The kitten whisperer

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    Comment by Cristan on June 6, 2008
  13. Oliver will be 3 on the 3rd of Aug – about a week and a half ago he slept at Grammie’s and left his soother there. It’s been smooth sailing ever since (although he hasn’t napped regularly since and it takes him about an hour longer to fall asleep at night…*sob*).

    And dude, I hear ya LOUD AND CLEAR on the whole “Where did my boy go?” thing. I feel very much the same way about MY boy.

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    Comment by mamatulip on June 6, 2008
  14. I know nothing about kids so i dont have any advice for you but just wanted to say that you have gorgeous children! Even if they are a little devilish. :)

    Ashleys last blog post..Transitional Home

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    Comment by Ashley on June 6, 2008
  15. A friend of our has worked with small kids for twenty years.

    Apparently it is a normal developmental thing for sweet little boys to turn into the KINGS OF THE WORLD in Kindergarten.

    It also apparently gets better.

    Here’s hoping. For you and I both :)

    Angellas last blog post..Need Cards For BlogHer?

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    Comment by Angella on June 6, 2008
  16. beast of burden hahaha!so your sweet little guy is turning into a tyrant?i think it does have something to do with school.and i have been in foriegn countries snd saw children who were at least 4 that still had soothers don’t stress about it Ali.

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    Comment by LAVENDULA on June 6, 2008
  17. He sounds just like my son. My sweet boy has started sticking his tongue out at me and calling me stupid. I think it’s kind a boy thing. Not that it’s okay. It just is.
    Matt’s kind of figuring out the balance between being sweet and being boyish and I hope it all works out.
    And … not judging you on the soother. We cut out Matt’s soother finally (when he turned 4) but we still have an emergency stash. Some kids just need them longer.

    LDs last blog post..Kindergarten

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    Comment by LD on June 6, 2008
  18. It’s a phase – don’t worry. The entire male population of my daughter’s kindergarten are hellions and the females are all sassy wenches. And I can say that because my daughter is the queen of sass right now. :) Are your kids out of school yet? It’s been particularly challenging the last couple of weeks as school here is drawing to a close. Good luck!

    Mumma Boos last blog post..Panties? What Panties?

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    Comment by Mumma Boo on June 6, 2008
  19. I have no advice, but MY GOODNESS, you have adorable children.

    She Likes Purples last blog post..Dragging Along

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    Comment by She Likes Purple on June 6, 2008
  20. Aww! Hang in there, Ali. It’s probably just a “phase.” All you can do is ride it out. Hormones…. ((hugs))

    Haley-Os last blog post..Clean Up Clean Up, Everybody Everywhere!

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    Comment by Haley-O on June 6, 2008
  21. Do they have military school for wee-lads? If so, maybe that’s an option :)

    Also, I love how Emily is hugging him like, “THANK YOU JOSH, FOR BEING A BUTTHEAD AND MAKING ME LOOK LIKE A PRINCESS!!”

    The Over-Thinkers last blog post..Monkey See, Monkey Do, I love Vegas, How ‘Bout You?

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    Comment by The Over-Thinker on June 6, 2008
  22. Okay Ali, your kids? Are WAY TOO CUTE.

    metalias last blog post..An Update on my Progress, or Lack Thereof

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    Comment by metalia on June 6, 2008
  23. Thats an age thing my darling. I dont think he will grow out of it anytime soon. Mine is 7 and just barely getting there. You know I’ll be honest with ya!

    Misss last blog post..…

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    Comment by Miss on June 6, 2008
  24. Dude, your kids are all going to be totally hot.

    slynnros last blog post..Random Shit Friday

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    Comment by slynnro on June 6, 2008
  25. Um sorry no advice. What a cutie patootie though.

    skiploveys last blog post..Conversational

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    Comment by skiplovey on June 6, 2008
  26. Good got, can we run away and live together? My five year old, my FORMER sweet, easy, I can’t believe he’s SO easy and agreeable five year old has turned into a hateful little shit monster too.

    Queen of Shake Shakes last blog post..I Just Lost 5lbs on a Walk by Crapping in My Pants

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    Comment by Queen of Shake Shake on June 6, 2008
  27. He’s hit the half year. The first half of any year is the “good” part. The 2nd half is the hell-ish part. The part where they act out and act up and where the heck is my sweet little guy and what have you done with him. SOrry to say Mine is there too. We have good days and bad. Some days the whining is sooo bad I scream into my pillow. Screaming fits because he says changing his clothes is Boring. BORING. You wouldn’t believe the total melt downs over things like, another cup of milk, changing his clothes, brushing his teeth, not finding his toy that he put down the night before.
    Your wonderful guy will be back. Hold the line and love him anyway.

    [Reply]

    Comment by charlotte on June 6, 2008
  28. weird. our kids are so much alike. seriously, almost frightening.

    did your mom ever call you on your birthday? did you get my book? are you on plurk?

    that is all.

    ohmommys last blog post..Why can’t they eat Poptarts?

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    Comment by ohmommy on June 6, 2008
  29. Oh, I have no help. But, your problem does remind me of this post that I read this week, about the boys and the changes and the whatnot: http://www.trianglemom2mom.com.....and-smelly

    Beths last blog post..BBQ: Who’s Your Mommy?

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    Comment by Beth on June 6, 2008
  30. Let me tell you something about boys. Mine will be 21 in August and he was SOOOOO easy until he turned about 19. He was potty trained at 13mos, off the bottle at 10 mos, in a regular bed at 18mo… all by his own doing. We threw his paci away when he was 6mos old because I hated it. I’m not judging you, so I hope it doesn’t come across that way, but my philosophy is different than yours. But it appears that she’s no worse for the wear.

    At least you don’t have her on a leash. Good GOD, have you seen those parents leading their kids around by a backpack thing? Now THAT’s lazy parenting!

    Oh yeah, the aggression thing. Sports was the best outlet for my son (and daughter) but since he’s obviously already doing that. I wouldn’t worry about it. Pretty normal if you ask me.

    Kristis last blog post..More Bathroom Stories

    [Reply]

    Comment by Kristi on June 7, 2008
  31. Cuyler got rid of his soother just before his 5th birthday.
    (he needed it to fall alseep until then)

    Christines last blog post..

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    Comment by Christine on June 7, 2008
  32. Oh my Precious, I’m only a wicked Step Mother but I can tell, you really are doing a fabulous job!

    Lauries last blog post..Tree Hugging Stratus with a Touch of Cumulus Nimbus …

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    Comment by Laurie on June 7, 2008
  33. Lately I want to take Alex (who is five as well but has always been a bit of a challenge) and shake him silly. NOTHING is good enough for him. Everything is met with something negative. He’s just a bit of a shit all the time.

    So I comiserate. Besides tequila, I have no suggestions.

    Chantals last blog post..So how do you feel about soccer?

    [Reply]

    Comment by Chantal on June 8, 2008
  34. Remind me again why I never had kids …

    Teena in Torontos last blog post..Book ~ "The Power of Nice" (2006) Linda Kaplan Thaler and Robin Koval

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    Comment by Teena in Toronto on June 8, 2008
  35. Not that I would know . . . I may very well be where you are in about four years.

    BUT, sounds like Rebecca has some great advice. I keep hearing that this (around five) is the time for dad to step in more often–supposedly they need more guidance/discipline (that apparently is testosterone infused) rather than nurturing (which you provide just by virtue of being his mom).

    Can’t wait to hear how it all works out–I’m prepping my parenting skills :)

    LaskiGals last blog post..The Shame of Indifference

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    Comment by LaskiGal on June 8, 2008
  36. Yes!! Rebecca’s advice is amazing. Dad time is pretty much the magic wand when it comes to crazy boys. Usually acting out is just a cry for attention, and little boys really mostly just want the approval and time of their fathers!

    [Reply]

    Comment by Mary on June 8, 2008
  37. no ideas for ya, just sympathy from somebody who knows how it feels… bless your heart… I hear it doesn’t last forever, but I haven’t passed through enough time to know that for sure :)

    jennyonthespots last blog post..Nosie’s New Look

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    Comment by jennyonthespot on June 11, 2008
  38. what???? Joshie did what???

    Hopefully it’s a phase.

    Or Declan is doomed too.

    Aimee Greeblemonkeys last blog post..The Incredible Hulk

    [Reply]

    Comment by Aimee Greeblemonkey on June 19, 2008
  39. edie still uses a soucie (souther) and she’s three. no judging here. i remember when grace was five, we went through similar attitude problems that required “adjusting” (read:eliminate anything fun from her life until she smartened up).

    meanies last blog post..

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    Comment by meanie on June 20, 2008
  40. Great post ! I want to know when you update your blog, where can i subscribe to your blog? :) :) :)

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    Comment by business web site hosting on September 16, 2008
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