June 23 05

since we haven’t had one in a while:

1) “I thought only pansies wore neckties.”
“See that? I thought only assholes used the word “pansy”.

2) “What came first, the music or the misery?”

3) “I shall serve no fries before their time.”

4) “Son, you may want to tuck that lip in before it gets caught on a trip wire.”

5) “Will you hand me a towel, tulip?”
“Ah, I like that. I like tulip. Tulip is much better than mongoloid.”

6) “Palm trees, Damn. You know what that means?”
“Yea. Watch out for falling coconuts.”

7) “Oh that’s gonna do me a lot of good because QANTAS doesn’t fly to Los Angeles out of Cincinnati, you have to get to Melbourne! Melbourne, Australia in order to get the plane that flies to Los Angeles!”

8) “I carried a watermelon.”

9) “The Statue is a gift from French citizens and has come to symbolize hope for naked women everywhere…”

10) “So you see, my son, there is a very fine line between love and nausea.”

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