February 9 05

~ there really was a nipplegate part #2 at the superbowl this year…and no, it wasn’t Paul McCartney. It was, in fact, a playboy bunny…you can check it out here, until someone takes it down..

~ a desperate housewife comes out of the closet! my money would have been on Felicity Huffman, personally…

~ The “Aristocrats” takes Sundance by storm. What’s the deal? i’ve been hearing all sorts of rumors about “the dirtiest joke ever.” so…here’s what i’ve found out:

Turns out, “The Aristocrats” is a joke nearly as old as comedy itself. It’s well known among those who make a living in comedy, and even presents itself in public from time to time — Gilbert Gottfried apparently unleashed his own version of the joke at a Friars Club roast a while back, stunning the audience, but sending his fellow comedians on the dais into a fit of tear-soaked, howling-with-laughter hysteria, partly I guess because even at the bawdy Friars Club, no one had ever thought (or had the guts — or gall) to go there before.

The joke always begins with a family walking into the office of a talent agency, and ends with the punchline “the Aristocrats!” The aim apparently is for the joke teller to fill in the middle by putting various members of the family into the most offensive sex acts and images the mind can conjure. Each joke-teller brands the joke with his own filth. The more tasteless, the better.

In the movie, Kevin Pollack told the joke imitating Christopher Walken. Hank Azaria did it in a Russian accent. Andy Richter told the joke to his infant son who was wearing a Santa suit (the baby too young to understand a word). Billy the Mime acted out the joke on a boardwalk. Eric Idle did an English riff. Merrill Markoe an artistic take. Mario Cantone went for gay Italian. Richard Lewis neurotic. Judy Gold, who was pregnant at the time, did hers with pregnant people. Robin Williams wore sunglasses and did his version on the beach, while Drew Carey did his on the set (off air, of course) of his TV sitcom.

One version involved the Amish. Another, starfish. Very, very friendly starfish. There were kazoos. Hitler in a Frederick’s of Hollywood getup. Midgets. Card tricks. A trapeze. Sweet Moses, they worked in the Olsen twins.

As George Carlin describes it the film, “The Aristocrats” is “the Tourette’s syndrome of jokes.”

  1. Will have to check this movie out.

    Comment by Master Foley on February 9, 2005
  2. No surprise on the lez-bean. She has about as much sex appeal as our fridge.

    Comment by Giblet on February 9, 2005
  3. I hardly think that constitutes nipplegate 2…*

    * see nipplegate 1: http://www.brmovie.com/Images/People/Janet_Jackson.jpg

    Comment by Giblet on February 9, 2005

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