October 2 13

Well, the good news is that after my wee Homeland Security kerfuffle, my flight to Atlanta was relatively uneventful. I chatted with a nice single-serving friend. I almost finished my book for book club next week. I caffeinated. And, well, I photobombed.


And then I did this thing where I didn’t realize I was peeing in a men’s airport bathroom until I was finished doing my business and went to wash my hands and, well, there were more hand washers who had penises than one typically finds in the women’s bathroom.

So, there really was nowhere to go but up.

And I sure did. I went to Atlanta to spend three days with my sister and my dad.

The last time this happened was exactly never.

We let my dad do the planning. A few nights before my trip, my dad called to let me know the itinerary. For those of you who have been around for a while, you know that my dad doesn’t call me (…something about apples falling from trees or something?) and this was the longest conversation I have ever had with him. We talked about shopping and eating and movies and puppies. Oh yes, I am definitely his daughter.

I bought a dress that an entire Kate Spade outlet store forced me to buy. I’m not even joking. Everyone had a say…and the say was that this dress was meant for me. And at 40% off, plus another 20% off, plus another 10% off and I was like THIS IS PRACTICALLY A FREE DRESS IT MUST BE MINE! I went to visit a puppy sanctuary to help my dad choose his favorite golden retriever lady puppy from a fresh, new litter. And after we narrowed from five to two, we were stuck.


It cannot be done. They have to take both, right? Right?



We went from shopping and puppying and eating straight to seeing three movies.

Yes, three.

We started with a giant tub of popcorn and a family-size bag of chocolate twizzlers and I know they taste a little bit like plastic but they are nut-free and in my world there’s not much choice when it comes to movie treats) and Don Jon.

We moved on to a giant tub of popcorn and Rush.

We finished up with a giant tub of popcorn and Prisoners in what was seriously the most interesting movie theater I have ever been to.


Now, Don Jon may have been kind of an awkward decision to see with your father—what with all of the whole porn thing, but his response was, “Now girls, you know that I’m a gynecologist, right?”

So there’s that.

It was so very good, I have to go back and see it with my husband. More than good, even. The Swiffer scene basically made me howl, and the jersey accents and clothing were almost too much for me to take. Also…Joseph Gordon Levitt can do no wrong. I mean, you have seen this, right?

Rush was so very good, I have to back and see it with my husband. I was expecting to not like this one but I figured I could indulge my dad after the whole porn debacle, but I ended up liking it a lot more than I expected to. In the beginning I spent a lot of time trying to figure out it this particular Hemsworth brother was Liam or Chris. It turned out that it didn’t matter that I didn’t know…and that I had never heard of this apparently super famous story of the 1976 Formula 1 situation between Niki Lauda (who?) and James Hunt (who?) but I was on the seat edge for most of the movie and really loved it.

Prisoners was so very good, I have to back and see it with my husband. I mean, I didn’t breathe through the entire thing. Not one single breath. This cast, man—exceptional. Melissa Leo? I hope she gets another Oscar and swears during her acceptance speech because she deserves it, really deserves it. Also, I am finding Jake Gylenhaal more and more appealing these days, even since he did the talk show circuit for this movie and basically made me pee my pants when he was on Jon Stewart.

I rarely see movies in the theater that don’t require 3D glasses. I actually looked at all of the under-excited parents in line to see Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs and after I felt a tremendous amount of glee to be seeing a real grown-up movie that wasn’t animated I nodded at them in solidarity—I have been there.

I have been there. But not these past few days. These past few days, I got to be a daughter. And a sister. And that’s it. Movies, shopping, eating, and, well, nail-biting at a pacemaker and defibrillator appointment. And it was awesome. Even the caardiac appointment—because everything with my dad’s heart looks good so we can exhale. And, stealing words from my sister, which I can do because she’s totally not a blogger, I hope it doesn’t take another 30 years to make something like this happen again.

  1. That sounds like a great trip, and I agree with you about Prisoners. Such an intense movie. I need to see Don Jon. And is the guy in Rush the guy from Inglorious Bastards who was the famous Nazi sniper?

    Glad your dad’s heart is looking good. :)


    Comment by Avitable on October 2, 2013
  2. I’m so glad you had a chance to just have fun with your family! Don Jon is on our must-see list, as is Prisoners… but I’m not sure I’ll be able to take seeing that one in the theater. It might stress me out too much.

    Unlike you, however, I was one of those parent-types in line to see Cloudy With a Chance of Meatballs 2. In 3D. OMG. Horrible. 2 words: Cheeseburger Spider. The one good thing that came out of it (seeing the movie, not the Cheeseburger Spider), was that when I politely mentioned the speakers weren’t working properly in our theater, the manager thanked me for being so nice about it and gave us 3 free movie passes. Those will be used on a non-kid movie, trust.


    ali replied on

    Hahah. you lost me at cheeseburger spider. ha!

    (See you in December?)


    Comment by Darcey on October 2, 2013
  3. I have so many questions about the photobomb! How did they know it was you? It is amazing!

    Your dad planned the itinerary???

    I’m so glad you had a great trip!

    I went into the men’s room in Vienna. It was in a restaurant and I really had to go. I didn’t notice the 2 doors into the toilet, nor the URINAL in there. So when I came out of the toilet, there was a dude there, doing his business.

    At least I can use the stupid American excuse!


    ali replied on

    So! The story was that I saw they were taking a photo of themselves so I HAD to photobomb it. They were impressed, obviously…so turned around to find out who the bomber was…and I asked them to tag me in it so I could see it (and use it)

    And yes HE planned it!! Crazy, eh?

    Ha. bathroom twins..obviously neither one of us notices urinals.


    Comment by Kristabella on October 2, 2013
  4. That was the “Mr. Affleck… there’s a hierarchy” part, right?

    loved it.

    My husband (not the most with-it pop culture guy) watched the one with Hugh Jackman too, and said “I didn’t know he was from New Zealand”.
    Jon Stewart (and my husband) make me laugh…


    Comment by suze on October 2, 2013
  5. First, so glad to hear that your dad’s appointment went so well. That exhale must have felt good.

    Second. The photobomb! I’m with @Kristabella…so many questions. Do you know them? How did they tag you? What? Why? How?

    And I have totally done the men’s washroom thing before. To my defense, it wasn’t clearly marked!


    Comment by Gwen on October 2, 2013
  6. I’m so glad you had a nice trip!


    Comment by Meghan on October 2, 2013
  7. I’m so glad you had a good trip.

    This whole wrong bathroom thing is like my nightmare. Like I’ve actually HAD nightmares about it. I would have made such a fool of myself trying to get out of there.

    I have always loved Jake but his hair right now is wigging me out a little. It’s a little too…greasy mobster(?) for me.


    Comment by Jen on October 2, 2013
  8. Love you


    Comment by charna on October 3, 2013
  9. Those random days with no responsibilities are amazing. I want to eat those dogs with a side of kittens.
    Kidding. I don’t like cats.
    Now you’re making me want to eat popcorn.
    I blame you for my thighs.


    Comment by Kimberly on October 3, 2013

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