I really should just stop traveling altogether, I think.
We had packed up about 17 suitcases. We had three ipod touches. We had one ipad. We had three pillows. We had drinks and snacks. Three kids had pottied.
AND THEN.
Great start to the Martell family road trip: DEAD VAN BATTERY.#GriswoldVacation
And this is how I feel about that.
Only, because we are slightly family-friendly over here, you get the wrong finger.
The other finger was all, “WHAT ON EARTH, YOU STUPID MINIVAN! I HATE YOU GET OUT OF MY LIFE AND NEVER COME BACK AND YOU CAN KEEP ALL YOUR CDS!”
Truth be told, our van in on its last legs and it will have to be replaced sooner-rather-than-later. (See: this summer, when we are done making tuition payments). It has given us many, many years and has allowed us to travel to Wisconsin and Georgia and South Carolina and Nashville. It allowed me to have three kids in cars eats and not break any major organs trying to get them in and out. It allowed me to drive carpool and shove several other children into the back.
But frankly, I am done with it.
And frankly, it is done with me.
We are breaking up, stupid Dodge Grand Caravan.
If I know one thing, it’s that toxic relationships are not worth it.
So, I have been cheating on my van of late…checking out the Acadia and Traverse. I window-shopped the entire ten-hour drive to Wisconsin, especially after we hit, oh, um, somewhere in the middle of Michigan and we realized that our built-in DVD player was totally and completely busted.
Our excited-to-watch-old-episodes-of-the-Muppet-Show children were less than thrilled.
Hey, wanna see that finger again, Dodge?
But, thankfully, our battery managed to get us all here in one piece, to spend a loooooooong Passover week with my family. But I’m warning you now, oh van of mine, if we can’t make it to Target this morning and to the zoo this afternoon, WE ARE COMPLETELY THROUGH.

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