So.

This weekend is the Jewish holiday of Purim.

It’s a fan favorite around our house because my oldest is a Purim baby (and, well, there are late nights and copious amounts of sugar involved.) No joke. Her OB went off of his shift to go celebrate the holiday of triangle cookies and dressing up in costume and getting hammered with his family and then came back to catch her stubborn little body. He wasn’t drunk, I’m fairly sure.

While the kids love this holiday, I kind of loathe it. I don’t know. I used to spend a ridiculous amount of time coming up with creative ideas to send food gifts to many friends. No really. This is an actual ‘thing’ you guys. (Jew school!) It’s called Mishloach Manot and it comes from the Book of Esther. It’s actually quite a lovely idea—and it’s exactly the opposite of Halloween isn’t it? Whereas on Halloween, children go door-to-door asking for handouts, here on Purim we actually go out of our way to create, assemble, and deliver junk food. So, back in the days before Pinterest, I had to use my wee NOT CREATIVE pea brain to come up with adorable ideas to, you know, top what I had done the year before. I was not very good at this game, but one year I had excellent fun with a black and white theme and made homemade hamentashen filled with brownie mix and oh dear lord they were divine.

So, this year I opted out.

Actually, I think I opted out last year too. But this year I have an actual, legitimate excuse in the form of said oldest child’s upcoming Bat Mitzvah party in ohmygod SIXTEEN DAYS.

But then.

My body worked out excessively hard yesterday (three sets of thirty lunges OFF OF A BENCH) and today I was unable to sit down on my toilet seat and/or to put on a brassiere and, well, stairs are a problem so my body was tired but my stomach was all rumbly and then I decided that the idea of a whole grain hamentashen filled with pumpkin pie filling needed to happen right that very moment.

And so it did. And I regret nothing.

Whole Grain Pumpkin Hamentashen

(Blasphemy and Sacrilege or sheer brilliance? You decide!)

You will need:

For the filling:

1  can pumpkin puree
2 tablespoons maple syrup
2 tablespoons light brown sugar
1 teaspoon pumpkin pie spice

(Alternatively, you can use pre-canned pumpkin pie filling. This exists. And it’s divine. Not that I know or anything…)

For the dough:
2/3 cup vegetable oil
1 tablespoon vanilla
1/2 sugar
2 eggs
2 1/2 cups whole grain or whole wheat flour. I use Irish Wholemeal flour that I have shipped FROM IRELAND BECAUSE I’M A CRAZY PERSON. It’s what I use for my Irish brown bread. It’s wonderful.
1 teaspoon baking powder
1/2 teaspoon salt

Directions:

1. Preheat oven to 350.

2. Mix the filling ingredients together and set aside. Or! Open your can of pumpkin pie filling! Easy!

3. Mix oil, vanilla, and sugar. Add eggs. Add flour, powder, and salt until well mixed. Don’t overmix.

4. Place dough on floured surface and roll out to about 1/8-inch thick. Cut out circles—I use a glass, it seems to be the perfect size.

5. Drop about a teaspoon of filling in the middle of the circle and pinch together to create a triangle.

6. Place on greased cookie sheet. Bake about 12 minutes or until lightly browned.

PUT IN YOUR MOUTH AND ENJOY.

Happy Purim!