Cheaper Than Therapy

  • About
  • Brands
  • Media Kit
  • Photography

Not the Ed Hardy Family

The Snark

16 Jan

There’s this couple in my neighborhood. I don’t know who they are or what their names are or what street in Pleasantville that they actually live on. All I know is that they run together—a lot. They run in the mornings, afternoons, and evenings. They run when it’s cold, when it’s hot, when it’s raining, when it’s snowing.

Instead of being impressed and *gulp* envious of their determination and commitment, I do what I do best. Because sometimes I can be kind of an asshole.

You see, this couple that runs together? I cannot see the “Oh, isn’t that so sweet? They are doing something great for their bodies and for their marriage!”

No. Because all I can see is their matching outfits.

I speak the truth, you guys. Whenever the two are out running, they are wearing the same thing. Morning, noon, night. Jackets, Lululemon hoodies, night-time reflectors (so jerks like me don’t hit them while I’m lazily driving while they are out getting exercise, obviously) neon track pants, red spandex pants, SHOES. Matching shoes.

Matching shoes.

Well luckily for them, they can’t possibly the worst offenders in my life.

They aren’t the Ed Hardy family.

Nobody tops the Ed Hardy family.

Want more pearls of wisdom (or something)? Come on over here and see what I had to think about the Golden Globes last night. I’ll give you a hint: I was partially confused by a bedazzled belt buckle.

16 Comments

« Oh, Timothy’s Coffees of The World…
Which ’80s Movie Reigns Supreme: Tada! We’re Going to Do Math! »

Comments

  1. karengreeners says

    January 16, 2012 at 9:04 am

    I don’t get men that wear the lulu. Of course, I don’t get runners, either.

    Reply
    • Louise says

      January 16, 2012 at 6:55 pm

      then you haven’t seen a man in lulu underwear 😉

      Reply
  2. Sandy says

    January 16, 2012 at 9:50 am

    Bahahahahaha! I love the Ed hardy family. Nice pic, slick. 😉

    Reply
  3. Kristabella says

    January 16, 2012 at 10:28 am

    That Ed Hardy guy is totally on to you. He’s looking right at you.

    I bet those matching outfit runners share an email account.

    Reply
    • alimartell says

      January 16, 2012 at 10:30 am

      OR WORSE…

      a Facebook account!

      *shudders*

      Reply
      • Angie [A Whole Lot of Nothing] says

        January 16, 2012 at 2:40 pm

        If you ever find out that they have a shared Facebook account, you have everyone’s permission to hit them with paintball.

        Reply
      • jack says

        April 5, 2012 at 6:38 am

        you can get
        ed hardyhere

        Reply
  4. Mrs. Wilson says

    January 16, 2012 at 11:22 am

    I always joke with Noah that when we’re old, we’ll have matching track suits. Even though we most certainly will NOT.

    That photo is awesome. Especially since you got Emily to “pose” for it.

    Reply
  5. Jessica says

    January 16, 2012 at 11:36 am

    Matching shoes? That’s too much. And I think just the fact that they’re running everywhere makes them worse than the Ed Hardy family. I used to live just north of a Running Room, and the freaking groups would run past my window all damn day. I never once felt like I ought to join them. Instead, I wanted to pelt them with stale muffins and order them to jog elsewhere in all that spandex. Because I too, can be a bit of an asshole.

    Reply
  6. Anne Rodrigues says

    January 16, 2012 at 12:13 pm

    Your post made me laugh. We, too, have a couple who run in the neighbourhood. I have never seen them before until about two weeks ago. I couldn’t help but snicker the other day (yes, even though they are out exercising and I’m not) because the wife was way ahead of the husband (presuming they are married). Now today he is way ahead of her. What’s the point in running together, if you don’t run together? No matching outfits though. Thank God.

    Reply
  7. Alison says

    January 16, 2012 at 12:54 pm

    People who run in “gear” are tools. Put on a pair of shorts, a tee shirt, and shoes and just go run (alone, preferably). I am proud to say I’ve never stepped foot in a running store.

    Reply
  8. kdiddy says

    January 16, 2012 at 1:59 pm

    That is such a travesty.

    Reply
  9. Jana A (@jana0926) says

    January 16, 2012 at 2:41 pm

    I love that you used your kid to get the stealth shot. I’ve never done that 😉

    Reply
  10. Dahlila says

    January 16, 2012 at 10:19 pm

    OMG, am blushing just looking. Fashion statement faux pas. My dogs (by chance have matching reflector jackets and I’M embarassed about that. Oh, the shame. 😉

    Reply
  11. Jen says

    January 17, 2012 at 9:50 am

    I just don’t get the couples dressing as twinsies. I mean you’re married, right? Not 6 year old twin siblings? Ick. Also, what does that make shopping like? You can’t just go in to Lululemon and pick out something you think is cute, you have to consult at every step of the way. Sounds like a lot of work only to look creepy at the end of it all. No thanks.

    Reply
  12. david says

    July 6, 2012 at 7:54 am

    Are you looking for wedding dresses or bridesmaid dresses,here got new styles of bridal dresses.

    Reply

Leave a Reply Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

About Ali

I am a writer, a mama, a wife, a lion tamer, a diet coke quitter, a juggler, a getter-of-drinks. Read More…

You can find me here:

  • Email
  • Facebook
  • Instagram
  • Pinterest
  • Twitter

Check out past posts

Load More...Follow on Instagram

Copyright © 2021 · Refined Theme on Genesis Framework · WordPress · Log in