After spending $1200 on a portrait of my children in August, i was hoping that September was going to be a cheap month. and by cheap, i mean one where the husband doesn’t come to me with the Visa bill all highlighted, showing off all my transgressions (yes, he does this. but, to be fair, it’s because our numbers have been stolen and used in the past. most of the time he just wants to make sure that some thief didn’t steal our numbers and do a buttload of shopping at RW&co and Lucky and Gap kids)
but, hoo boy was i wrong. September is back-to-school. September is fall. September is when i go into my children’s closets, realize that they have nothing that fits because they decided that summer was a good time to grow a couple inches and shoe sizes.
so, i visit the mall.
i bought 14 pairs of tights for fall. the girls better want to wear skirts EVERY day. because tights? EXPENSIVE. (note to self: must get colored tights for the fall. they are everywhere. BRIGHT colors too.)
clothes for Isabella. easy. Old Navy. clothes for Josh. easy. H&M. seriously, they have the BEST boys clothes. except skinny jeans? for little boys? REALLY? Josh already looks way too much like a girl to put him in skinnies. he’s too young to be a Jonas Brother. and doesn’t have enough eyebrow.
Emily is, well, not as easy.
remember how she wanted an argyle J.Crew sweater? a $148 sweater…that she absolutely NEEDED or she’d die? well, i tried to pacify her with this
which…let’s just say, was around, um, $20. (bless you, H&M…and no, i’m not saying this just to taunt you, miss slynnro)
why, you ask? NOT CASHMERE.
and now…she absolutely needs a pair of these. or she’ll die.
which, at Brown’s, were $115. i tried to put this into perspective for her…i have to buy EIGHT pairs of shoes for the kids for fall. EIGHT. Emily needs school shoes, gym shoes and fancy synagogue shoes. Josh needs the same. and Isabella needs two. eight pairs of shoes that they are going to outgrow in THREE months.
so…we left with nothing. she folded her arms. sat down on the bench. and turned her nose up at every pair of shoes i showed her.
“i. am. not. wearing. skechers.”
and, you see, this is where my parenting needs to kick in. be smart, Ali. be sensible, Ali.
(because good god, i would want the lacostes too. i mean, i even kind of want the same pair that she wants. see? Emily would make a GREAT shopping buddy. but i have to be her mother, the voice of reason, and that sucks.)
“Then call your Bubbie.”
next fight we are going to have? jackets. all three of them need jackets. great…
maybe October will be a cheap month.
ps. i promised littleAli in a tutu and a porsche hoodie. and i ALWAYS deliver.
pps. have you seen the Tina Fey as Sarah Palin video yet???? i seriously want to make out with Tina Fey right now.