May 5 14

A few things happen when I shower in an empty house.

The first is this: I always assume that there’s something at the door from UPS or Purolator or, say, the York Region Police.

The second is this: I always a assume that there’s a baby crying. Even though my baby is seven years old. And not at home at the time.

The third—and most important—is this: I assume the entire ordeal will end in a Psycho-esque knife stabbing.

Alimartell-psycho

 

Obviously, I watch too many scary movies.

Screen Shot 2013-02-25 at 9.38.02 AM

What I left out was that static on the television makes me believe a scary child named Samara is going to crawl out of it and leave wet puddles and, well, my life behind.

I refuse to say the word Candyman out loud.

When I stand in front of a mirror, the reflection will reveal another person behind me. A murderer, obviously.

Dark woods are an absolute non-issue for me because, well, Blair Witches, of course.

And don’t get me started on identical twins.

And natural bodies of water.

AND BIRDS.

*Shudder*

What about you? Any irrational scary movie fears?

 

-
  1. Totally rational. All of it.

    Every time I come up the stairs from our basement I am certain I will be yanked down and killed. Also, I insist on closing the closet doors in my daughters’ rooms. They have no fears but I am like, “Ok, let’s shut these tight because, well….” and I trail off. Every night.

    [Reply]

    Comment by Amanda on February 25, 2013
  2. Yes, yes and yes and also yes to what Amanda does!! If I wake up from a bad dream I make sure my entire body is underneath the blankets cause that obviously keeps me safe!

    [Reply]

    ali replied on

    Yes! It’s amazing how we feel like blankets keep us safe. I’m the same!

    [Reply]

    Jen Wilson replied on

    ME TOO.

    [Reply]

    Comment by Lindsay on February 25, 2013
  3. yes! yes! yes! I commented on your facebook status already, but clearly, I love talking about this. My biggest is the under the bed leg grab pulling me down into hell… or something like that. Walking on a dock by the lake: there are obviously dead bodies under there (evil dead). Cemeteries? Hands may come out of the grave to, once again, pull me into darkness – eternal torture, whatever (Carrie). Road trips? Obviously some psycho killer is hanging on for dear life under the car (Cape Fear). Don’t even get me started on mirrors (bloody mary obv.), ouija boards, dark rooms (in general), corn fields (Malachai), road trips through small towns (jeepers creepers), walking through empty school hallways and trouble sleeping (I blame Freddy freaking Kruger). Every time I get on a plane it’s Final Bloody Destination. I have major issues Ali… major.

    [Reply]

    Jen replied on

    I’ve never admitted it to anyone, but Final Destination is totally the reason I have anxiety about flying. I mean, what if my fears are really a premonition, and I ignore it, and we all die?

    So I drug up and pass out. Works like a charm.

    [Reply]

    Comment by Sandy on February 25, 2013
  4. Whenever we drive on I-10 through Tallahassee area I am afraid of looking around because that’s where they filmed Blair Witch and I’m always afraid of seeing the house.

    [Reply]

    Comment by Hockeymandad on February 25, 2013
  5. This is why I don’t watch scary movies. Because I have these fears and I live alone!

    [Reply]

    Comment by Kristabella on February 25, 2013
  6. I have ‘Great White’ syndrome. Like I could be in the bath tub and think that Jaws is going to dismember me. True story. :)

    [Reply]

    Comment by Kat on February 25, 2013
  7. My big one is something under the bed grabbing me as I get into bed. I’ve solved that mostly by having a modern platform bed in my room so there is no “under the bed.” The woods at night don’t scare me, thank goodness since I live in the dark countryside surrounded by forest. Neither do cemeteries which is a good thing because my family cemetery sits in my yard down the hill from my house.

    [Reply]

    Comment by Julie on February 25, 2013
  8. Sharks … it’s why I don’t take baths, only showers … and this predates Jaws (only by a tad).

    [Reply]

    Comment by LizP on February 25, 2013
  9. Of course, never say Bloody Mary into a mirror, somehow that one I can’t let go and still believe something really bad will happen!

    [Reply]

    Comment by Anne on February 25, 2013
  10. I CANNOT sleep with my feet outside of the blankets. CANNOT. Because you know, a ghost might touch them or something.

    [Reply]

    Comment by Gwen on February 25, 2013
  11. I don’t even know where to start with all of my irrational fears from movies. Of course I will never walk alone in a cornfield (Children of the Corn AND Signs), I never dangle my feet off the bed, I always check the back seat of my car before getting in it, I always look behind the shower curtain when I go in a bathroom (anywhere), I hate clowns, and I’m terrified of sledge hammers only because of the scene in Misery.

    [Reply]

    Comment by Jen on February 25, 2013
  12. am terrified of birds – my kids think it’s hilarious! of course, under the bed, closests, and I would never ever say bloody Mary in a mirror…very scared of large dogs to begin with so don’t even mention Cugo to me!

    [Reply]

    Comment by Maria on February 26, 2013
  13. YES. To all of those. Every single one.

    I watched Ernest Scared Stupid as a kid, and to this day, every time I turn over in bed, I expect to see a big ugly troll.

    Also, I need to peek behind the shower curtain every time I used the washroom.

    And I cannot shower when I am home alone. I just cannot.

    [Reply]

    Comment by Jen Wilson on February 26, 2013
  14. Closets. OMG. The little scary freaky boy from The Grudge is in the closets, if they’re open even a little bit, at night. FREAKY.
    The showering thing, though, the only thing we have in common is thinking we hear our babies crying when they’re not home/not babies anymore. Well, that’s creepy on its own, actually… haha!
    Scary movies stay with me for a LOOOOOOONG time. I did not sleep for about two months after accidentally watching Paranormal Activity, the scariest movie ON EARTH OMG.

    [Reply]

    Comment by Loukia on February 27, 2013
  15. Right after watching The Ring my husband called me from work. I just about died.

    [Reply]

    Comment by Sharon on February 27, 2013
  16. Uncovered windows at night. There must be someone outside that I can’t see just staring at me and I won’t see them until I turn the lights off.

    [Reply]

    Comment by Karen on May 15, 2014
  17. I always, always think I am going to get up from my bed, put my feet on the floor and that someone will slice my Achilles.

    Also, I can’t look into a mirror in a dark room before turning on the lights. I have to have my back to the mirror before the lights come on. (Bloody Mary)

    [Reply]

    Comment by Kristabella on May 15, 2014
  18. Spiders. Thank you very much, Arachnophobia. I have nightmares of sitting on a wood swing in my front yard and being swarmed by spiders. Or eating popcorn, and one is hanging out in there. (I always check my bowls and the whole bag when I pour it in.)

    [Reply]

    Comment by Darcey on May 15, 2014
  19. The storm drain thing. Even the ones that are gated that steam comes from because of the trains. Damn Pennywise

    [Reply]

    Comment by Rachel on May 16, 2014
-

Allowed tags: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <strike> <strong>

css.php