It’s very important that we discuss this.
It’s bad enough that I had to see a full-grown woman walk through the Atlanta airport in giraffe-print slacks (Also, how horrible is the word slacks? It’s really right up there with moist and ooze) and a full-grown woman in flannel pajamas in Ottawa this week.
But now this?
What you are looking at, friends, would be a CROP TOP.
Something that has been popping up all over the runway, all over some of my favorite go-to clothing stores, and, sadly, all over PEOPLE I see every day.
According to The New York Times, “There is one thing that Britney Spears, circa-1980s Madonna, Gwen Stefani, ‘I Dream of Jeannie,’ the Spice Girls, ‘Clueless’ and Matt Dillon in ‘Over the Edge’ have in common: a devotion to the crop top.”
Look, I got on board when the fashion people tried to tell me that skinny jeans were more flattering than my 18 pairs of flares.
I even bought myself a pair of green jeans.
I even accepted the fact that neon was back.
I looked the other way as fedoras happened.
THIS IS A TRAVESTY.
I don’t care what your abs look like…I don’t want to see them.
I don’t want to see this.
Or this. NORACHELBILSONWHY?
Why with the midsection? I don’t really think there’s a right way to pull of classy while exposing your navel and midriff to the world.
Oooh! Who wants to see the pastiest part of my body?
Oooh! Who wants to see the, erm, loosest part of my body?
It’s not appropriate for me, as a mom. It’s not appropriate for my daughter, as pre-teen. It’s not appropriate for anyone, unless, perhaps you are, um, working corners.
Keep your bellies to yourselves, ladies. PLEASE.
And seriously, you guys, if I see a shoulder pad, the gloves are coming off.