February 7 12

You guys, my kid.

I realize I have three, but two of them are not MY kid, but instead they are some sort of DNA hybrid of their father and me. (Imagine!) I see traces of me sprinkled all over Isabella and Joshua. When Isabella makes piles of outfits and labels them with the days of the week, I see me. When Josh sits on the couch and voraciously reads his way through an entire novel, I see me.

Emily, though, she is completely and totally 100% me. Mini-me, if you will. (Although she would probably take offense to this…“Are you calling me a midget?”…because she hasn’t quite figured out yet that if we make midget jokes about ourselves, we get the laughs in first.)

Well, she is me. Only way, way more talented.

And way, way, way funnier.

It was when she turned to me and said, “WHAT? Her name is Ellen DEGENERES?!?!?? I swear to god, I always thought it was Ellen THE GENEROUS!” that I knew.

My kid is going to be a better blogger than I could ever possibly be. 

She’s already ready.

She has the funny.

She has the stories.

She has the bershon.

She has the one-liners.

And, then, you guys.

She won the Superbowl.

Today she finds out what part she will play in the child-friendly version of Glee: The Stage Play.

Obviously, she’s hoping for Rachel Berry, as evidenced by her “Don’t Rain on My Parade” audition song.

“Since, you know, I was born to BE Rachel Berry. And I already have a sweater with a horse on it. And that shirt with the Peter Pan collar…”

But we tried to tell her that, well, every part in Glee is great, except for Will Schuester’s crazy ex-wife who pretended to be pregnant, only I’m assuming she doesn’t show up in the elementary school version.

“You’re right. If I’m Brittany S. Pierce I get to basically live in a Cheerios uniform. AND I GET TO BE FUNNY.”

A girl who sees the beauty in wearing a cheerleading uniform unironically. And sees the beauty in being funny??

She’s the blogger that *I* want to read.


  1. I’m just going to ask the obvious: When are you going to let her guest post here???

    Also, I love your kids. Your kids are enough to almost make me change my mind about having kids, and that alone says volumes.


    Comment by Camels & Chocolate on February 7, 2012
  2. I miss Emily Martell’s tweets.

    Also, how am I the only that favorited that tweet? PRICELESS!

    I miss all your faces!


    ali replied on

    I told you. Twitter doesn’t really work for me.

    I got lots of response on Facebook :)


    Comment by Kristabella on February 7, 2012
  3. She is histerical! Amazing to have that sense of comedy and irony at her age. She is her mama’s girl!


    Comment by Shannon on February 7, 2012
  4. Get that kid an agent.


    Comment by Angie [A Whole Lot of Nothing] on February 7, 2012
  5. Haha, Emily! Very funny…

    I need to mine your brain (is that even an expression) for something. What drama/acting classes programs would you recommend in the GTA for somebody who is just getting started and is interested? This is actually for my son, not my daughter, but he is a natural performer!


    Comment by Renee on February 7, 2012
  6. Ha ha! Awesome! She’s hilarious!


    Comment by Martha on February 7, 2012
  7. Let her start blogging NOW. NOW, I say.


    Comment by Jana A (@jana0926) on February 7, 2012
  8. She really is funny and she has that gift from her mama. And she has a good point there about the leggings as pants.


    Comment by Jen on February 7, 2012
  9. She certainly has that bloggy x-factor


    Comment by Tania on February 7, 2012
  10. I want to read her too! Get that kid a blog already!


    Comment by Shan @ the fairy blogmother on February 7, 2012
  11. Yup, I think it’s time for an Emily guest blog post. She is awesome!


    Comment by Nenette on February 7, 2012
  12. I was following her on Twitter at some point, but somehow I am not now. That has been corrected.

    She already has Rachel’s clothes, you already have Annie’s clothes. She is her mother’s daughter, and maybe she’ll be the first child of the social media generation who really gets it without resentment but with a smile.


    Comment by Avitable on February 7, 2012
  13. I’m so excited to say “I knew her when…”


    Comment by Nanette on February 7, 2012
  14. when I read that tweet it made me lol :) She would get along really well with my daughter.


    Comment by Stéphanie Montreuil on February 7, 2012

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