January 12 12

Do you take vitamins? I have sort of been toying with this idea of late but I am confused about vitamins and when I spend time looking at boxes at the pharmacy I start to confuse the vitamins with the feminine itch creams, because, seriously, the boxes are all the same. Pink and pretty, as if to say that growing older and having an itchy vagina are things you may really want to have. Look at the box, kids! So pretty! Scratch this!

I’m not exactly sure why I started thinking about it. It’s probably the whole geriatric thing. I mean, I hit thirty like it was nothing. My mental checklist was all…lack of wrinkles? Check! Ass still smokin’? Check! Boobs still where they are supposed to be? Check! Hair awesome? Check! Thirty is awesome! I love thirty! And then I hit 33. 33 is, well, not as awesome. While my boobs are still lovely (Hooray for the little boobs and the ability to buy bras off the clearance rack at Target!) some of my other parts seem to not be holding up as well. I’m starting to look old.

And I know what you are going to say.

Laugh lines are a sign of someone who has had a life full of laughter. 

Brow lines are a sign of someone who has furrowed her brow, deep in concentration while good a book, or overseeing her children’s homework, or worrying about her babies. 

Tummy pooches are a sign of someone who has grown three amazing babies.

And trust me. I get this. I get the whole MAMA WEARS HER WAR WOUNDS PROUDLY thing.

I get it.

I do.

I do wear them proudly.

I really have no complaints about what this body has been through in its 33 years. I have everything to be happy about and to be proud of. I have laughed, it’s true. I have worried, it’s true. And I have babied, it’s true. And I wouldn’t trade these things for anything. My life is amazing. I have never been so happy.

But is it really TOO much to ask to stay looking a little younger for a little while longer?

I could really do without all of this hair thinning.

I could really do without my ass disappearing.

I could really do without the dry skin.

I could really do without the knee pain.

I could really do without the freezing-cold extremities.

I could really do without the black, raccoon-like bags under my eyes.

Last night I had my cholesterol checked for the first time. I had a body-fat assessment done.

I stressed like hell about it.

I mean, I eat fairly well. But I do love butter, and I love to indulge. (I mean, we are currently undertaking The Great Chocolate-Chip Cookie Challenge at our house, baking everyone’s suggested best cookie recipes and trying to decide which recipe is our favorite.)

I mean, I exercise fairly well. But I haven’t seen the inside of a gym in, well, years, probably. And the last time I had an assessment done I was told that all 104 pounds of me was obese, due to the 27.7% body fat.

I mean, I take care of myself. But my family history of good things like heart disease and diabetes and Alzheimer’s scare the everloving shit out of me.

But, there’s good news.

Cholesterol. LOW and good.

Body fat. 20% and good.

He even suggested that I might need to gain some weight in my legs and arms.

And, well, you know what that means! Bring on the butter. And the cookies.

Although what he actually said was that I should bring on the gym and the vitamins.

So, there’s that.

So, any vitamins to recommend?

  1. Oh I hear you sistah, I do. And I do have some recommendations (at the wise-old, yet relatively smokin’ hot) age of 43. Vitamin D, a must. Omega-3, a must. Oh, and tell your doctor the only way to gain weight in your arms and legs is to also gain it in your ass, back, and “bat wings”. If you don’t know what those are, count yourself lucky. On the bright side, if you do gain weight the other place it’s likely to go is to your boobs. Of course that means no more Target discount bras, and that would suck.


    Comment by Gray Matter Matters on January 12, 2012
  2. There’s no hope for me if you’re obese at 104 pounds.

    I literally have two obese alimartells living inside of me.

    It’s OK to laugh at that. I am.


    Comment by Angie [A Whole Lot of Nothing] on January 12, 2012
  3. Best intro ever. It was nice to see you last night and I think you’re smoking hot! (in a not creepy kind of way;))


    Comment by Sandy on January 12, 2012
  4. Wait what? Where did you have that last assessment done? I swear some of those body fat assessment tools really make me question the usefulness of that yardstick. Is this actually what medical professionals are using as a measure of someone’s health? I tend to think of it as one of those scare-tactic tools that they use at gyms to make you sign up for personal training sessions. Don’t get me wrong, I love my gym and I have enjoyed working with a personal trainer in past but I am seriously flabbergasted that you were told you were obese. Sorry I don’t have any more suggestions for ya.


    Comment by Jen on January 12, 2012
  5. Children’s gummy vitamins are the way to go. No yucky vita-burp later in the day.


    Comment by Crista on January 12, 2012
  6. [...] no shame to her, my pocket pal, alimartell, wrote about being fat-pinch measured as “obese” in all of her 104 pounds. I don’t care what the arbitrary charts and medical field jargon say [...]

    Pingback by My Body Equals Slightly More Than Two Obese @alimartell Bodies | A Whole Lot of Nothing on January 12, 2012
  7. My doctor told me years ago to take the Women’s One A Day Multi-vitamin. And that’s what I take. She also told me to take some extra calcium and Vitamin D pills. I always forget to take those.

    I need to start taking some Omega-3.

    Also, you should get most of your vitamins from food. That’s the point. The multi-vitamin should just be a supplement.


    Comment by Kristabella on January 12, 2012
  8. When I remember, I take a multivitamin & a fish oil, although I don’t remember the exact reason for the fish oil.


    Comment by Nanette on January 12, 2012
  9. I just have to throw out there that 33 was it for me too! 2 months before 33, sitting in my car, glanced in the rear view mirror & saw a gray hair & that started the downhill spiral. Granted this was about 3 months after the OB told me my “problems” happen when we get “older”. And that’s the last time that boy will ever talk (ok, not really, but totally not talking to me again). And the wrinkles are starting. What the HECK? Sadly, wrinkles do not bother as much as gray, gray makes me want to curl up in a ball somewhere and rock. I don’t know what Vitamins are unless you count my Dr putting me on Vit D because of a deficiency, which I promptly filled the prescription & then forgot to take. I rock.


    Comment by Spring Blankenshhip on January 12, 2012
  10. I take my estrogen every day.


    Comment by Avitable on January 12, 2012
  11. I take the Women’s One a Day Petites – not giant horse pills, and no bad effects.


    Comment by pgoodness on January 12, 2012
  12. It’s funny that you mention vitamins and aging in this post because those are two things on my mind at the moment. Taking care of myself physically is a goal of mine for this upcoming year. And, part of that goal was taking a good multivitamin. I haven’t taken one in years because they are horse pills and taste horrible. Not any more, friend! I have discovered the One-A-Day Vita Craves GUMMIES! Hell to the yes. And, since turning 31 (today!), I have noticed the bags under my eyes! Oye.


    Comment by Linda on January 12, 2012
  13. 33 was the death of me. It was so hard. 36 is nothing compared to 33. Enjoy :)


    Comment by Jana A (@jana0926) on January 12, 2012
  14. A pre-natal vitamins is best to take. In my opinion, they are better than regular multivitamins. It should help with the hair thinning. Mine started thinning the same month I turned 33! I use Rainbow Lite Prenatal One Vitamins and have been for more than three years. Good luck!


    Comment by Jenny on January 12, 2012
  15. I take a One A Day women’s multivitamin every morning. Not because I know a lot about vitamins, but because they are on sale at Target right now, I had $10 worth of coupons for them AND I got a $5 Target gift card with purchase, so I might not be exactly healthy, but I’m cheap! :)


    Comment by foradifferentkindofgirl (fadkog) on January 12, 2012
  16. Once you know what you want, chat with your pharmacist (or any pharmacist, really) about the right brand. I work for a health system and our pharmacists say that there are some brands of vitamins that will literally go right through you – so you aren’t actually digesting the nutrients and it’s just a big ol’ waste of money.


    Comment by Jen on January 16, 2012
  17. Tights have had an incredibly extended and varied history. They had been originally worn by males centuries ago to be a practical garment for horseback riding, but they were a far cry from the hosiery we know nowadays. In reality, the modern day version of Signature tights or pantyhose weren’t created till considerably more recently.


    Comment by UYscottJX on February 24, 2012

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