Celebrations for special days are stupid. They should just be outlawed completely. Perhaps I should celebrate my birthday on some random day in September. The weather is always better in September than in May anyway. Mother’s Day ended in tears. Mine and theirs. My anniversary ended in tears. Mine and theirs. How will my birthday [...]
Fourteen years ago today I could not even legally drink. I was 19-years-old. I was young and in love. I was swept up in a very romantic story. I had little girl dreams of a white dress and then, of course, a white-picket fence. I didn’t care that we were still in school. I didn’t [...]
“I can’t believe I’m sending my child to school dressed like a ragamuffin!” “I am so perturbed right now, Ali, I’m going to sell you to the gypsies.” “Do you know how many hours I have to work to pay for this closet full of clothing that you never wear?” “I have been working like [...]
It will be worth something one day. Right now, though, I will be blowing it up as big as I can before it starts to lose its perfection and I will be hanging it in my son’s room as a reminder of why he is off of sugar this week (He choose no sugar for [...]
A conversation. Me: Oh my heavenly days!! All I wanted was to peel a stupid carrot and somehow—I don’t even know how this happened—but I managed to pull off the nail on my middle finger and it hurts like a bitch. OWWWWWWWWW! Him: Hmm. Me: This should probably be some sort of torture—ripping fingernails off [...]
I seriously am, like, giddy with excitement to write about what I did yesterday while you were all getting enraged about a Time magazine cover and discussing Obama and gay marriage, but, alas, I’m waiting for images of me and Ross the half-nude model to come in from the Harlequin cover shoot photographer. Yes, you [...]
I currently have the full-time job I have because of this site right here. That’s pretty sweet, if you ask me. (See bloggers…it can be done!) This space right here is not currently a money maker, unless, of course, you count the coffee money I get from running the two ads you might see on the top [...]
I feel like I don’t ask much from my body. I mean, I’m fairly good to it. I feed it more good-for-it stuff than bad-for-it stuff. I gave up Diet Coke more than a year ago—cold turkey. I move it on a regular basis. I even just bought it TWO bikes this week. I dress [...]
Yesterday I paid a visit to John the bicycle guy. I haven’t been on a bike since I was twelve years old—a red schwinn ten-speed. The “it’s just like riding a bike” expression? Well, it’s an expression for a reason. You really DON’T forget how to ride. So, John the bicycle guy has a house [...]
Isabella is the baby. She is six and three quarters, sure, but in many ways she is still very much my baby and in some ways is so stereotypical of how you’d expect the youngest child to be. I often see my mom interacting with my baby brother (at almost 27, he’s hardly a baby [...]
For a little context, I will admit this here right now: I read the entire Twilight series in 4 days. I basically ignored my children while ignoring the ridiculousness that was the series and enjoyed the entire damn thing. I was entertained by the whole thing, even though Bella Swan was insufferable and there was far [...]
Last night I lost Isabella in a Michaels craft store. It wasn’t like that one time when I lost her in a Target—when I saw my entire life flash before my eyes in the few seconds she was out of my sight. No. This was different. There was panic, sure, and that weird barfy feeling [...]
