August 4 11

Once upon a time, in the not-so-distant past, I had a lovely wardrobe. I had settled in a weight that I was comfortable with and a size I figured I’d stay at for a very, very long time. I invested in dresses and good sweaters and nice pencil skirts…things that weren’t going to quickly go out of style and things that I absolutely loved. But then some unexpected things happen and I am suddenly finding myself almost 2 sizes smaller than I had gotten used to and those lovely dresses and sweater and pencil skirts are now making me look like I’m playing dress-up in my mom’s too-big-for-me clothing. And this former solid 34C is now just barely holding on to a 30B or 32A (at least that’s what my Target bras tell me, because, oh happy day, when you have just wee boobies, you can do things like buy brassieres off the racks at Target), except in a demi bra because, seriously, whoever in the heck invented THAT? Can anyone of any size wear a demi-bra and not get the horrible double boob effect?

Please note: I am not complaining. (Let’s call the wahmbulance! The girl who lost weight is whining again!)

For the first time in my life I look in the mirror and I like what I see. My body, right now, is a product of eating right and moving more.

BUT, I have been taking some drastic measures in the clothing department. Short from buying a brand-new wardrobe (which I cannot afford) and having everything taken in (which I also cannot afford), there’s little that can be done. Sure, I can occasionally get away with some strategically placed camisoles and some hidden-from-sight safety pin placement and some really high-tech camouflaging layering techniques.

But I have taken my Macgyvering up to a brand-new level.

You see, I am now wearing some of my dresses backwards.

Yes.

This, actually, is a trick I learned from my stepmom. She is a frequent church-goer and if any of you have ever been to a place of worship, exposed boobage is slightly frowned upon. So, she once shared a piece of wonderful wisdom with me. If you wear a v-neck dress backwards…and toss on a cardigan, no one in your synagogue or church or any other house of God, is any the wiser that occasionally you wear that dress v-neck-side out to bars and places of non-worship.

So, when some of my most favorite dresses on the planet because unwearable, I needed to take some drastic measures.

No really. See?

Wait. Here. Get a better look, as aided by the help of a white camisole.

Notice the side puckering and how low that neckline falls. One of my most favorite dresses in the world. Unwearable. But, we have a solution! Turn that baby around and see what happens!

I really am a miracle worker, I tell you.

And then, as a final touch, throw on a cardigan.

The end.

Any questions?

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  1. TMI WARNING * TMI WARNING

    On demi-bras, when i have gone shopping they tell me my boobs are not the right size to wear one; I have/do own ONE (known as my “sexy” bra), but really? They almost fell out when i was wearing it before I lost a tiny bit of chub in the boobage area.

    TMI WARNING * TMI WARNING

    On the dress, it looks lovely backwards :D

    [Reply]

    ali replied on

    And I have WEE BOOBS…but no matter what…in a demi bra, my boobs fall out. Who can wear those? seriously?

    [Reply]

    Mari replied on

    People who buy boob tape?

    [Reply]

    Cassandra replied on

    I love my demi bras and NEVER have any issues at all! And I’m a small boobied person too. ;)

    [Reply]

    Comment by Mari on August 4, 2011
  2. I absolutely love that dress, and am so jealous you own it! But it looks great on you, no matter how you wear it! :)

    (Also, congrats on getting to a weight you’re more comfortable with. I’m down 10 pounds as of this morning, with some more to go!)

    [Reply]

    Comment by Darcey on August 4, 2011
  3. Lovely! Big question, is it wearable sans cardigan?

    [Reply]

    ali replied on

    It TOTALLY is. It’s just a scoop in the back…so it really looks fine. Some dresses don’t look as great backwards.

    The cardigan, for me, with this dress, is really to cover up all the extra fabric near the armpits…because the dress is really just too large everywhere.

    [Reply]

    Comment by Amanda on August 4, 2011
  4. beautiful! great idea! i will do it myself..

    [Reply]

    Comment by sapir on August 4, 2011
  5. What an amazing idea! GENIUS!

    [Reply]

    Comment by Kristabella on August 4, 2011
  6. Nicley done – great idea, looks great.

    [Reply]

    Comment by monstergirlee on August 4, 2011
  7. You are rocking that backwards dress.

    Demi bras used to work out just fine for me . . . before I had a baby :/

    [Reply]

    Comment by HollyLynne on August 4, 2011
  8. If you have really itty bitty boobs like me, demi bras sometimes work better than regular bras because the cups are smaller. There’s no risk of boob spillage for me :( It can gap though which can be unsightly.

    I will have to try wearing some dresses backwards though! It’ll be good to minimize the chance of flashing my bra while wrangling a wiggly toddler.

    [Reply]

    ali replied on

    YES! It’s so good for dealing with kids. No chance of any boob-slippage :)

    [Reply]

    Comment by Catherine on August 4, 2011
  9. Just wanted to say I LOOOOVE this idea. AND I think the dress actually looks better backwards, the usual way is too low for my taste.

    [Reply]

    alimartell replied on

    Thanks!!!
    I like it better with less showing in the front too!

    [Reply]

    Comment by Cassandra on August 4, 2011
  10. kinda brilliant. very brilliant.

    [Reply]

    Comment by designhermomma on August 4, 2011
  11. I agree – completely brilliant. Though I have to admit I wish I had the problem of small breasts and clothes two sizes too small. Good for you though – you look fantastic is a backwards dress (now I never thought I’d say that to someone before :)

    [Reply]

    Comment by Maija @ Maija's Mommy Moments on August 4, 2011
  12. Welcome to the itty bitty titty club! Trust me it’s all good :) You look great by the way!

    [Reply]

    Comment by kami on August 4, 2011
  13. What a great idea this is. I can see my wardrobe having a whole new lease of life.

    [Reply]

    Comment by Kira Green on August 5, 2011
  14. Ali! This is genius! If only my problem weren’t in the opposite direction.

    [Reply]

    Comment by Amber on August 8, 2011
  15. You’re a damn genius, alimartell.

    [Reply]

    Comment by Angie [A Whole Lot of Nothing] on August 8, 2011
  16. Wow, I thought I was the only person in the world who had to buy a 32B at Target. And really, I’m being generous, I could totally get away with a 32A.

    Hell, I could wear my bra backwards, no difference would be noticed.

    So. Very. Sad.

    [Reply]

    Comment by katy on August 8, 2011
  17. I’m lost on how the demi bras conversation started…but I have a question about the dress…isn’t the extremely high neckline a little uncomfortable? Don’t you feel like you’re choking in it?

    [Reply]

    Comment by Crystal on February 8, 2012
  18. Great idea! Sadly, due to ample boobage, there’d be far too much front fabric in my dresses to look decent turned around.

    [Reply]

    ali replied on

    Yes. I think it probably works better for the flat ladies :)

    [Reply]

    Comment by Leigh on January 22, 2013
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