May 2 11

Here’s the thing about suddenly having a commute. I could get annoyed by the fact that I have to drive twenty minutes from my house to the subway; I could get annoyed that I have to pay to park at the subway and then still have to walk 10 minutes to the subway; I could get annoyed that during rush hour the subway is, erm, rather cozy. Or, you could be like me and realize that this, friends, is what they call

Blog fodder.

It’s true. Sometimes I am actually jealous of my pregnant friends because, seriously, is there anything better than getting the gift of nine months of posts that essentially write themselves, and that’s not even counting the posts once the baby is born. It’s almost worth having another baby. Almost. What did Jon Armstrong say? That Marlo was good for business? He is telling the truth, friends. Well, let me tell you what’s good for my business…THE SUBWAY and/or the rather colorful neighborhood in which my office building is located.

Because just today there was the girl I sat beside who played her red DSi XL while smacking her gum like a damn cow chewing its cud. Chomp. Chomp. Chomp. Smack. Smack. Pop. Pop. Smack. I did the glaring thing. I was about to get all Cell Block Tango on her little arse. You pop that gum one more time...I made the WTF face at her 17 times.

Yes. That one.

There was the dude who started shouting expletives including the f-word. Why, you ask, because surely someone wouldn’t audibly start cursing on a crowded subway unless something really horrible happened, right? Well, as it turns out, someone was standing too close to him. On a crowded subway. Imagine that.

There was the lady in the man’s suit with the painted-on eyebrows and no eyelashes.

There were the two women traveling together who I so desperately wanted to give just a wee bit of advice to. “Ladies. One word: THONG.” Really? Are they honestly, legitimately, blissfully unaware of that little thing called panty lines?

…and this was only after one day.

What’s that you say?

OH. You wanted to know about my job? (and by wanting to know, what I really mean is that you are all EnoughAlreadyWithTheVaguenessAliMartell, SpillItDammit!)

Senior Online Associate Editor at Canadian Family.

My first day was filled with all sorts of good things. I met lots of people who all seemed very sweet, but who I really think should wear name tags from here on out. I learned about secret entrances that require passes. I wore heels all day for the first time in over a year and didn’t get blisters. I discovered a super convenient but ridiculously out-of-my-measly-budget coffee shop. I was kind of surprisingly productive work-wise. And I ate a red velvet cupcake.

Yes. I’m full-time fancy now.

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  1. Congrats! On the job AND the blog fodder!

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    Comment by Pgoodness on May 2, 2011
  2. YAY! I’m so happy you had a great first day. And got to eat a red velvet cupcake, which reminds me I took a picture of a menu item that made me think of you the other day.

    Also, yay for blog fodder. Missed you today. xo

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    Comment by Meghan on May 2, 2011
  3. I was thinking about you today! Mazel tov on the new job. You’re going to be amazing! And you might remember I can’t deal with gum AT ALL. Total phobia. It’s the one thing I share with Oprah. Gum phobia. So thank you for the pop smacking fodder……! Eeeeek!

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    Comment by Haley-O (Cheaty) on May 2, 2011
  4. Sounds like an exciting commute! Can’t wait to hear more stories about your future encounters.

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    Comment by K-Tee on May 2, 2011
  5. Congratulations Ali, what an awesome job! Hope you adjust well to fulltime commute and busier days, I will be joining you soon having enjoyed the last year at home being just a busy mom! 2nd interview today, wish me luck!

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    Comment by sarah on May 3, 2011
  6. Yay for a good first day!

    Today I got crop dusted on the train. The public transit commute never fails to provide me blog fodder.

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    alimartell replied on

    I had to google crop dusting…but, OMG, that has happened to me before too! GROSS.

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    Comment by Kristabella on May 3, 2011
  7. I am SO SUPER HAPPY for you and your real job!

    Also, I need one. Send along a good word for me, yes? I just won’t move to Canada.

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    Comment by Angie [A Whole Lot o on May 3, 2011
  8. You are so awesome.

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    Comment by Maria on May 3, 2011
  9. Hooray!

    I was excited for you when you first told me and I’m even more excited for you now that you’re there and love it.

    Can’t wait to hear your stories! xoxo

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    Comment by Angella on May 3, 2011
  10. Okay, can I admit that I now have a weird envy-crush on you?! I adore Canadian Family (I’m a subscriber) and I love your blog – now I <3 both a little more! They couldn't have chosen a better candidate if you ask me. Congrats Ali. Can't wait to see your work in action.

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    Comment by Lucy G on May 3, 2011
  11. OMG, congrats on the new job! So exciting.
    I feel for you… that commute sounds nuts. I’ve been going through the same now that we’re currently car-free and have to get to dance lessons, swimming lessons, and appointments via public transit. OMG, the smells! Truly blog fodder. I’ll be writing about this soon.

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    Comment by Nenette on May 3, 2011
  12. Dude, you were already full time fancy, now you just need the subway to do it :) xo

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    Comment by Sharon on May 3, 2011
  13. I feel about the gym like you feel about public transport. It’s an endless source of amusement & weirdness.

    I would rather have panty lines than wear a thong. It just feels gross to have something up my butt all day.

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    alimartell replied on

    The gym! I know!The BEST material!

    have you tried hanky pankys? They totally get rid of panty lines and are not typically the up-the-butt type of thongs. They look great under pants and dresses!

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    Comment by Suebob on May 3, 2011
  14. Congratulations on your new job! You’ll be amazing. As for the subway, it’s one thing I don’t miss about having to go downtown everyday. I can cope a few days a week not at rush hour. I did have lots of fun tweeting about the antics during my commute.

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    Comment by Eden Spodek on May 3, 2011
  15. CONGRATS ALI!

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    Comment by slynnro on May 3, 2011
  16. Yay new job! And hot dog, I love your new digs around here. It’s beautiful!

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    Comment by Redneck Mommy on May 3, 2011
  17. The blog looks great! Do I really still have to worry about VPL? I could never get used to a thong.

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    Comment by Ryan Roe on May 3, 2011
  18. Grats! You’ll rock it. :)

    Love the new design too. :)

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    Comment by ShredderFeeder on May 3, 2011
  19. Congrats on the new job! The blog looks beautiful. :)

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    Comment by mommabird2345 on May 3, 2011
  20. congrats to you and your new “baby”…both babies i guess… the website and the job!

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    Comment by Julie on May 3, 2011
  21. LOOKS AMAZING!!!!!

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    Comment by Kristabella on May 3, 2011
  22. I’m so! glad you had such a great first day. And hi, your site looks GORGEOUS.

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    Comment by Kerri Anne on May 3, 2011
  23. I have to admit, thinking of you on public transportation is kind of funny, because I know how poorly I’d handle it.

    I love the new blog design so much!

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    Comment by Avitable on May 5, 2011
  24. Congrats! what an nice job! Hope you adjust well to fulltime commute and busier days. All the best to you.

    [Reply]

    Comment by Jessie on October 13, 2011
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