April 27 11

On the agenda for today: procure reasonably priced and reasonably attractive work clothing.

Yes. On Monday, I am starting a new job that I am unreasonably excited about.

(I am also unreasonably nervous to the point of pants-peeing, but let’s not focus on that right now.)

As of late, I had been sort of, well, vague about what is happening in my life. I don’t know if you have noticed. You probably haven’t. But, I have been gearing up to make a huge change in my life. For the past [insert a large-ish number of months here] I have been a work at home mom, or WAHM, if you must. But, I kind of loathe that acronym. I gave up my heels and my nanny for some time to drive carpool and wear yoga pants every day. It was kind of amazing. But, if there’s one thing I have learned in my almost 33 years on this planet it is this: Life is√ā¬†unpredictable; always expect the unexpected.

And something unexpected came my way.

And on Monday morning, I will putting on my heels and getting on the subway at Finch station for my morning commute. I will spend my work hours in an office building with actual people who will require me to put on some pants. I will no longer be throwing in a load of laundry while checking my work email while helping Emily with homework while using my kegels to hold in my pee while helping Isabella change into her ballerina costume while helping Josh pass a level on Angry Birds Rio. I will be doing a very different kind of juggling.

I cannot wait to tell you all about it.

But first…PANTS!

So, today I went to Jacob, thinking that I would have a productive hour or so picking out some lovely spring wardrobe essentials. Hoo boy was I wrong.

“Are you looking for something specific?”

“No, thanks. I’m just looking.”

“Can I recommend this dress? It’s just lovely!”

“No thanks. I’m really just looking.”

“Oh, I see you are looking at our two-toned cardigan. We just got that in. We have it in three colors. Do you want me to show them to you?”

“No thanks. I’m just looking.”

“Can I start a fitting room for you?”

“I actually don’t have anything in my hands yet.”

“Oh, but aren’t you going to try on that cardigan?”

“I’m just going to look around, if that’s okay with you.”

“I see you are looking at our new orange dress. Do you want to try the yellow one too?”

“No thanks. I have a yellow dress. I’m pretty sure one is enough.”

OMGIWANTTOSTABWITHWOMANINTHEEARANDPUNCHHERINTHENECK.

STOPTALKING.

I didn’t love the cardigan or the orange dress. I didn’t love the other two dresses I tried on either. Just, well, not for me.

“Oh, you aren’t going to buy anything?”

“Nope. Not today. Thanks.”

“Not even the orange dress?”

“No. Not even the orange dress.”

“Was it a size problem?”

“No, I just don’t want to buy it.”

“Did it not fit properly? Do you want to try it in the yellow?”

“I am going to go and spend my money at RW&Co. And not ever come back here until you are fired.”

For the record, This ENTIRE conversation happened, word for word, save for the last line. I said that one in my head. But I really wanted to say them out loud. Because there is a fine line between HELPING somebody when they want to be helped, and being so pushy that you literally push them straight out of the door.

RW&Co should probably send this lady a thank you note for her giant commission today.

 

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  1. Oh my God, that conversation you had with the Jacob sales person is SO ANNOYING. Why can’t they just leave US ALONE when we’re looking and shopping? GOD. That is a HUGE frustration for me. YAY for your new job! The best part about working in a nice downtown office for me is lunching with friends, and shopping. And being able to finish my coffee while it’s still warm!
    Oh, for pants, Banana all the way. Seriously, 97% of my work wardrobe is from there. :) GOOD LUCK! YAY YOU!

    [Reply]

    Comment by Loukia on April 27, 2011
  2. haha how obnoxious!!!

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    Comment by LAVANDULA on April 27, 2011
  3. Jacob used to be my go-to place about…five years ago. Now it’s RW & Co. ALL THE WAY.

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    Comment by Angella on April 27, 2011
  4. UGH, I totally would have said that! You told her ENOUGH times that you were just looking. Take the hint, stupid person!

    Glad you found some new stuff! Yay for new work clothes! And yay for new jobby job!

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    Comment by Kristabella on April 27, 2011
  5. God how annoying. That’s why I shop online. They never judge me and I get my money back if I have to return something.

    But hey, congratulations on the new job!

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    Comment by kirida on April 27, 2011
  6. Can’t WAIT to hear about your exciting new job. I live vicariously through you. As my dog snores at my feet, my laundry needs folding and my life needs some um, excitement. Congratulations!!

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    Comment by Redneck Mommy on April 27, 2011
  7. Congrats on the new gig, and also for having enough self-control not to punch that sales person in the face!

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    Comment by Amy on April 27, 2011
  8. Oh, ICK. Leave me the hell, alone people!

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    Comment by Mama Bub on April 27, 2011
  9. Can you say “commission”?? Wow.

    Ali, we will miss you SO much but I am so very excited for you in this new role as Professional Career Woman. I think you are going to love it!

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    Comment by Jen Maier on April 27, 2011
  10. Congratulations Ali! And oh holy heck about that saleslady. Does she run the poke button at Facebook too?

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    Comment by Karen Sugarpants on April 27, 2011
  11. So freaking annoying. It’s like they are bored or something? I had a similar conversation last night with a waitress about avocado club egg rolls at CPK. In the end, I believe I ordered them to shut her up…so basically she won.

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    Comment by Issa on April 27, 2011
  12. Parabens

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    Comment by Elaine Batista on April 27, 2011
  13. rw & co was the best choice anyway! Jacob has gone down hill for me anyway .. but that girl, holy cow she needs reporting ..talk about a pita!

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    Comment by Sarah on April 27, 2011
  14. Congratulations! on the new gig. I’m SO EXCITED for you, babe. And I can’t wait to hear details! You know, when you want to/can share them.

    (YAY!)

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    Comment by Kerri Anne on April 27, 2011
  15. I am SO happy for you.
    And maybe you should add panty liners to your shipping list for tomorrow. Just to be safe.

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    Comment by Meghan on April 27, 2011
  16. Congrats on the new job! I am not sure what I would have said to the sales lady but I can tell you it would not have been nice.

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    Comment by Shannon on April 27, 2011
  17. I have visited one store that I like but I fear to enter because there is a woman who works there who is so loud and shrill that she makes me jump every time she speaks. I’ve tried giving subtle hints like falling on the floor and groaning: “You scared me” whenever she says anything but so far my r3eactions haven’t had the desired effect.

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    Comment by Sharyn on April 27, 2011
  18. i have never set foot into an RW&Co until i got a sweater from them at xmas! they rock!

    ….and what is this jen is speaking of? will we no longer be seeing “juice” anymore? :-(

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    Comment by Julie on April 27, 2011
  19. Have no fear, Julie! I will be moving Juice over to this site over here. I am working on a brand-new redesign right now!

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    Comment by ali on April 27, 2011
  20. a) I’m peeing my pants I’m so excited FOR you

    b) You should have told her you didn’t want to buy the dress because your kegels weren’t working and you peed on it.

    c) RW&Co is my all time favourite store

    d) Did I mention the peeing for you? *claps hands excitedly*

    [Reply]

    Comment by Sharon on April 27, 2011
  21. Congratulations on the job and I hope you went back in and shook your bags and said “Big mistake, Big. Huge. I have more shopping to do now.”

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    Comment by Jana A on April 27, 2011
  22. I thought I’d read that Jacob was in some financial trouble. Still, that’s no excuse to have obnoxious salespeople.

    Congratulations on your new job.

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    Comment by Danielle on April 27, 2011
  23. Yay on the new job! Also, I would have been out of that store the moment she started to ask me about the cardigan…when I shop I want to be left alone!!

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    Comment by Sensibly Sassy on April 27, 2011
  24. Good luck with the culture shock of being in an office again! :)

    [Reply]

    Comment by Avitable on April 28, 2011
  25. I’m stoked for you… but wondering what I’m being all stoked about…!! Exciting times ahead, my friend… yay for you!!

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    Comment by Grumble Girl on April 28, 2011
  26. ugh! What an obnoxious salesperson.
    I have always wanted to take the pile of clothes they are trying to ‘power-sell’ me, call over their manager and tell the manager that these are the clothes that I would have bought had their salesperson not been so pushy, and then walk out of the store. I just don’t think I could do it with a straight face though….

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    Comment by K-Tee on April 28, 2011
  27. So excited for you. So funny – I do SO well at Jacob (although I haven’t had that kind of salesperson!), and I do horribly at RW&Co. LOVE Jacob. I don’t think anything could make me quit it. I might tell her to “go away” though! ;)

    [Reply]

    Comment by Haley-O (Cheaty) on April 28, 2011
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