February 24 11

Can we talk about Isabella’s irrational fear of spiders for a moment?

Irrational fears are not new for Isabella. She was once afraid of Humpty Dumpty. And then there was the whole Burning Bush situation. And there was the time that her closet was talking to her. And, you know, the scary painting in her room.

And now it’s spiders. She has actually never ever seen a spider in our house. No, she is scared of MYTHICAL SPIDERS. She is scared that if she goes to sleep there could be a spider. No. I am not making this up.

At first I thought it was a stall tactic. You know..I’m hungry, I’m thirsty, read me one more book, I need to pee, I need a hoodie, I just need to tell you one more thing, and, obviously, Hells Bells There Might Be Spiders Oh My Heavenly Days I Can’t Possibly Go To Bed Mommy!!!! So, every night – because I am a giant pushover and because I actually enjoy my evenings and don’t really feel like missing American Idol because I’m spending my entire night dealing with a child who won’t sleep for fear of being attacked by a spider – I do the spider inspection.

(Let the record show that my child is not scared of any other creepy crawly critters. Oh no. She loves bugs of all kind and even tries to keep caterpillars in plastic cups, unsuccessfully, all summer long.)

I search every inch of her room. The walls. The floor. Under the bed. Inside the closet. We spray the “mythical spiders be gone” mythical spray. We declare her room officially mythical spider free.

And yet.

I still find her in her spider-fighting Spiderman jammies sleeping beside me when my alarm starts singing “Oh, Brooklyn, Brooklyn take me in” each morning. Or she is watching Arthur in French while talking to her Lexi baby doll and keeps hitting me in the face with her unicorn pillow pet. But either way, she is in my bed and not in her own, where she belongs.

I am thisclose to hitting my breaking point, I thought, as I gathered up all her gear to put back on her bed. And, obviously, that was when I SAW IT.

Oh yes I did.

**

Fantastic.

(**not the actual spider. Enlarged for proper emphasis.)


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  1. Ughhhhhh….that is the creepiest spider ever! I hope she didn’t see it!

    [Reply]

    Comment by Amanda on February 24, 2011
  2. DID IT LOOK LIKE THAT? BECAUSE I WOULD NEVER SLEEP AGAIN!

    Also, I cannot come to your house ever again now, if THAT is the spider you saw.

    [Reply]

    Comment by Kristabella on February 24, 2011
  3. *crossing off visit Ali’s house from my MUST DO LIST*

    ZOMG!

    [Reply]

    Comment by Jen on February 24, 2011
  4. I hate spiders, too.

    Emily’s not scared of spiders, but NATHAN is scared of almost every bug. Ants, especially.

    [Reply]

    Comment by Angella on February 24, 2011
  5. That picture is evil. EVIL I say. I think there should be a warning on top. I had to cover it and squint my eyes to read this.
    (I’m with Isabella on this one. Total irrational fear.)

    [Reply]

    Comment by Dana on February 24, 2011
  6. I have always hated spiders. I grew up on a farm – and my bedroom was in the basement. I remember one night when I was 17, I came home at 2AM (past my curfew mind you) and went downstairs quietly to my room. I opened my bedroom door and there was a HUGE spider on the wall. I could have probably killed it with my shoe that was lying on the floor, but I just…couldn’t. I was terrified. I went upstairs and woke my dad (who would now realize how late I was) to kill the evil spider. He grumbled and I believe swore and sleepily walked downstairs. He grabbed my shoe and slammed it against the wall killing the spider, but leaving it stuck to my girly wallpaper. He stormed back upstairs to bed. I couldn’t even wipe of the remains, and went to sleep with spider guts on my wall. Nice eh?

    [Reply]

    Comment by Shelly on February 24, 2011
  7. I’m also with Isabella. Spiders are creeeeeeepy!

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    Comment by alison on February 24, 2011
  8. I think I need more sleep (Or a vacation? Yes! Back to Maui!) because when I first noticed “The Baby” tag on the top of this post I was all, “WAIT? Did I miss something huge? Is ALI PREGNANT?”

    And that’s how internet rumors start.

    (Also: Spiders are gross. I’m telling God that when I get upstairs someday.)

    [Reply]

    Comment by Kerri Anne on February 24, 2011
  9. I am laughing so hard I’m nearly crying. My six year old used to do this. Ants too. For three solid years. Stupid freaking spiders and ants. THEY ARE EVERYWHERE!

    Give her a shoe to throw at them.

    [Reply]

    Comment by Issa on February 25, 2011
  10. i live in florida so there are freakin’ spiders EVERYWHERE. and i hate them with a fire that burns brighter than the sun…okay, not really. but i really don’t like them. so i’m with isabella, spiders can suck it.

    [Reply]

    Comment by Tricia on February 28, 2011
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