February 1 11

So.

There’s this thing that I say sometimes and I am completely and totally mortified that I say it. I would love to blame it on the fact that I grew up in both Wisconsin – where water fountains are called BUBBLERS and sprinkles on ice cream are called JIMMIES – and Georgia – where people are FIXIN’ to put the toys UP. But, I’ll be honest, I can’t even blame this on my upbringing.

Now, I’ll come right out and tell you that my ears bleed when people say would of instead of would have. And please don’t even get me started on those people who say might could. Might could? Really? My eyes bleed when I see writers who can’t figure out if the word ITS requires an apostrophe or not, whether affect or effect is appropriate, or whether an I or a me or a myself is needed in the sentence.

So, what I am admitting to you right here is that I am a complete and total hypocrite.

Because I say this:

“Why do we need more tablecloths? Couldn’t we just use THOSE ONES?”

You see, it makes sense in my head at the time. There are tablecloths just sitting on the table, unused. So, obviously, I need to ask why we can’t just use those ones over there. Yonder. I don’t know. There is no explanation.

I guess I’m not the only one…

Please make me feel better and tell me something YOU SAY that you know is completely WRONG.

PLEASE.

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  1. I always put “at” at the end of sentences when I don’t need to.

    “Where’s the plates at?” etc.

    And I umm… this isn’t something I say but I uh… point when I talk. In no real direction.

    So if I’m talking about the location of something, I’ll be waving my finger around in the air, and the person I’m talking to is like, “WHAT are you pointing at?” and I have no answer.

    [Reply]

    Comment by Justin on February 1, 2011
  2. This was written just for me, right? Because as much as I’m a Grammar Nerd, my use of proper spoken English is deplorable.

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    Comment by Angie [A Whole Lot o on February 1, 2011
  3. I’m grammatically incorrect in writing and speaking.

    I don’t use apostrophes or commas correctly ever.

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    Comment by Jen on February 1, 2011
  4. I had a typo in the FIRST WORD of my post yesterday. ALL DAY! And I seem to be having a brain fart everytime I write already or is it all ready?

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    Comment by Emma @ embracethecha on February 1, 2011
  5. I was raised in North Carolina, and I am ashamed to say that I often catch myself saying, “wouldn’t” like “wooden.” Same with any word that ends in dn’t. Embarrassing, id’n it?

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    Comment by Cyndi on February 1, 2011
  6. I’m trying to figure out why what you say is wrong?
    Is it because you say “those” and then pluralize the word “one”
    As opposed to saying “them”
    I am really confusing myself.

    Also – “I could care less” – that leaves room for you to actually care less. Isn’t it be “I couldn’t care less”?

    My parents are from Northern Ireland so the slang I grew up with I could write an entire post about…like we called buns/dinner rolls “baps” and groceries were “messages” – I shit you not.
    There are dozens and dozens more.
    No wonder none of my friends could understand my parents…

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    Comment by Christine on February 1, 2011
  7. Another pet peeve? Supposingly AND supposively.

    Great book is “Eats, Shoots, and Leaves”!!

    And wrong things by me – ALL the time.

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    Comment by Dana on February 1, 2011
  8. ‘Unthaw’. I need to remember to unthaw that chicken if I plan to cook it for dinner later. Um… wouldn’t ‘unthaw’ actually mean to freeze? I blame my mother.

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    Comment by andifoo on February 1, 2011
  9. I tend to writ EXACTLY the way I speak which does not bode well when you consider my fav shows as a kid were Square Pegs & Beverly Hillbillies! My husband is very forgiving!

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    Comment by marci on February 1, 2011
  10. I’ve developed a fear of writing grammatical errors since I started blogging. No word of a lie. Every time I begin writing something I am stricken with the fear that someone is going to leave a grammar or spelling related comment. LOL

    But me? I’m the WORST proof-reader. Ever. I type, read quickly and then post. Done. BAD.

    I *think* I mix up who and whom a lot, and sometimes it’s and its.

    I KNOW the difference between your and you’re yet sometimes I slip up.

    I couldn’t tell you what an adverb, adjective, pronoun, conjugative or any of those are. BUT! I am bang out a mean technical report or proposal.

    I think.

    I mean, no one’s told me any different.

    Maybe they’re just being polite.

    Now I’m going to be nervous doing that too.

    [Reply]

    Comment by sam {temptingmama} on February 1, 2011
  11. [...] This post was mentioned on Twitter by alimartell, Emma Waverman. Emma Waverman said: You wrote that for me, didn't you? RT @alimartell: Come join me in the GRAMMAR CONFESSION BOOTH: http://bit.ly/ic1TlN [...]

    Pingback by Tweets that mention Cheaper Than Therapy » Blog Archive » In the Confession Booth. -- Topsy.com on February 1, 2011
  12. Oh, and there’s not NEAR enough sentences where I can use the word ‘UNITARD’. We clearly don’t talk about one piece spandex enough.

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    Comment by sam {temptingmama} on February 1, 2011
  13. Wait.

    “Those ones” isn’t right? I’m as picky as you are about its and it’s and they’re and their, but I say “those ones” all the time.

    Maybe it’s a Canadian thing?

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    Comment by Angella on February 1, 2011
  14. I say. anyways. Yep I know. I can’t stop. A friend told me I may as well say “whatevers” :) this comparison has helped me cut back on anyways. I think those ones and these ones get mixed reviews. I have heard from some it is nor incorrect. Anyways!

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    Comment by Jeanne on February 2, 2011
  15. I was born and lived my first 17 years in Wisconsin. I have never, ever heard anyone call a drinking fountain a bubbler. I know it happens, especially close to Kohler, where the Bubbler product was produced, but only because people tell me it is true. It is totally not a state-wide thing.

    I’ll claim pop instead of soda, going TO home instead of going home and a host of regional idioms, but I always met the bubbler *wink,wink,nod,nod* comments with a blank stare.

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    Comment by Melissa on February 2, 2011
  16. us rhode islanders call it a bubbler, too! although since we don’t pronounce our R’s it’s more “bubbla”

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    Comment by Rachel on February 2, 2011
  17. Melissa…REALLY? Every Milwaukee-an I know says bubbler!

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    Comment by ali on February 2, 2011
  18. how about “I’m so bored of sitting here” – total pet peeve .. or, “It costed too much” .. YES! I actually hear people say ‘cost’ in the past tense, irks me to NO end.

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    Comment by Sarah on February 2, 2011
  19. Nope. I don’t do none of that. Its a shame people can’t remember they’re grammar and punctuation rules. (hahahaha)

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    Comment by Jana A on February 2, 2011
  20. For the longest time, I . . . this is hard for me to admit . . . I’m really ashamed of it . . . I used to say “I could care less”. *sob*

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    Comment by Avitable on February 2, 2011
  21. My pet grammar peeves are: I Seen (ugh really?), Dezember (there’s a C not a Z) and “you’s” that’s not a word people!

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    Comment by katy on February 2, 2011
  22. Dana I agree. At work I saw a written version “suposily” I thought the word was referring to a name, so I asked the person who wrote it, and she looked at me as though I needed help. “It says suposily the bank returned the check.” Supposedly.

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    Comment by Christina on February 2, 2011
  23. I still struggle with affect and effect and google it frequently to try and help me out…I really just don’t get it sometimes. I need someone to explain it to me simplified or something, I don’t know what my problem is.
    My weird word is “Alls”. Used in a sentence it is “Alls I’m saying is…” or “Alls they needed was some ice” or “Alls they had was this”. I live in North Carolina now but all my family is from Maryland. I have asked them if they say it and most of them do. My dad told me that he doesn’t say and I have caught him at least 3 times since then saying it :)

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    Comment by Stephanie Parnell on February 2, 2011
  24. @Melissa: Your bubbler point is totally valid. I grew up in SE WI where “bubbler” was the standard, but my husband grew up in northern WI, and never heard some one use the word “bubbler” until he got to college. I forget that it’s really more of an eastern WI thing, instead of just a WI thing in general.

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    Comment by Angela on February 2, 2011
  25. Those ones. I say that. I am also from Chicago, so I end sentences with prepositions “Where are you at?”

    Also, sometimes I screw up borrow and lend.

    When I’m speaking and IM’ing, I generally make many grammatical errors. But I at least know I’m wrong. Which I think is a big difference from a lot of people out there.

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    Comment by Kristabella on February 2, 2011
  26. I’m opposed to grammar generally. People spend way too much time on Twitter- YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE- ranting about grammar. GET OVER IT.

    I think all of things are mostly colloquialisms to my area.

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    Comment by slynnro on February 2, 2011
  27. ok, i’m embarassed to admit this…BUT.
    i was notorious for saying “i SEEN that movie”

    after my (smart ass)niece corrected me for the millionth time. i finally got it right!

    also. i can not stand when people say “fustrated” instead of you know fRustrated. it makes me stabby!

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    Comment by AngieM. on February 2, 2011
  28. I’m not always sure when to use “fewer” vs. “less”. Also, does that period after “less” go inside the quotation marks or outside? I think it goes inside but I’m not quite sure, so I alternate, inside, outside. :) Plus, I do not like the phrase “same difference.” (See the period inside?)

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    Comment by alison on February 2, 2011
  29. P.S. My husband’s grandfather rolls his eyes whenever anyone says “those ones”.

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    Comment by alison on February 2, 2011
  30. I am fairly certain I know how to write correctly, I just often…don’t.

    My mother in law says brought when she means bought. It drives me a little bonkers.

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    Comment by Deidre on February 2, 2011
  31. A bubbler? Jimmies?? It’s like you came from whole other states than I do..did…ah, now I’m all panicky!

    I used to be a huge freak about grammar, but since I started blogging, I write like I speak – as if I am having a conversation with my readers.

    And I like those ones, but when people put AT at the end of a question? I want to gouge their eyes out. :)

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    Comment by pgoodness on February 2, 2011
  32. Jen-Everytime I see your picture I wonder when one of my daughters started blogging!

    Hearing FaRve all football season makes me stabby. It is FavRe people!

    Supposively? Made me laugh myself off my chair.

    I used to be quite ok with my grammar until one of my sons started correcting me and now I am painfully aware and second guess EVERYTHING! lol

    [Reply]

    Comment by Lisa on February 4, 2011
  33. Major pet peeves.
    Obvious – AKA Ovious (there is a B people)
    Sandwich – My loving gramma always offers “salmon Samriches” She’s old so I will forgive her.
    My mother takes “Frustrated” one step further adn leaves out both R’s. She is always so “fustated”

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    Comment by April on February 5, 2011
  34. Even though I was raised with a super strict father who HATED slang in any form…I say gonna. I KNOW that it’s going to. But.

    Gonna. Gah!

    [Reply]

    Comment by briya on February 19, 2011
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