December 29 10

(YES. It’s not a word. So, trolly troll troll…I know your first instinct is to leave me a comment and say something to the tune of, “Ali. You are awesome. Resoluting is not a word.” BUT, la la la la, I have learned a fancy new trick. It’s called “BLOCKING AN IP ADDRESS” and so no matter how many fake names and email address you leave, you won’t be able to leave any comments here. Better get yourself a new IP address, STAT. I can’t wait to play this game. It’ll be like Dexter when he’s hunting his prey. Which leads me to…)

1. Don’t let the trolls win. WordPress gave me a delete button, Twitter gave me a unfollow button, Facebook gave me a block button for a reason. In 2011, I will not be afraid to use them.

2. Use my phone more. I pay way too many Canadian dollars a month to have this lovely little smart phone, and I have probably made six phone calls from it, and I am pretty sure they were all work calls or they were to Bell. I need to call my mom. My other mom. My mother in law. My friends who are far away. My friends who are close by but don’t use social media. My sisters and sister in laws.

3. Actually bake the cookie dough and the brownie batter.

4. Purchase the perfect LBD.

5. Stop shrinking things in the laundry.

6. Use better passwords than “password.”

7. Teach the world the difference between effect and affect. See also: it and it’s. See also: How to use ME and I when it is appropriate, OMG.

8. Take a real photography class. Learn things about light. Find a sugar daddy to buy me a 24-70mm f2.8 lens for my camera. Use it regularly. Continue to endlessly annoy my children by shoving my camera in their faces.

(*PLEASE NO PICTURES*

9. Stop watching Grey’s Anatomy.

10. Stop singing along when that dumbass Ke$ha song comes on the radio…I got Jesus on my neck-a-lace. Hold me.

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  1. Yes! Delete away! Good resoluting! I don’t know why ppl are afraid of that button. It’s *yo* blog, you know?
    Happy New Year!

    Comment by Haley-O (Cheaty) on December 29, 2010
  2. Wonderful resolutions. As long as you don’t block me! Have a great 2011!

    Comment by Karen on December 29, 2010
  3. My only resolution for 2011 falls directly in line with yours.

    “To care less about you and more about me”

    Comment by Angie [A Whole Lot of Nothing] on December 29, 2010
  4. I like your resolutions. I should do #2 myself, but I LOATHE talking on the phone.

    I gotta tell you, I’ve tried to teach the world about there/their/they’re and your/you’re AND THEY JUST DON’T CATCH ON. I cringe when I hear someone say “Me and him went …” NO! It’s *HE* and *I* and GO BACK TO GRAMMAR SCHOOL.

    Comment by Mrs. Wilson on December 29, 2010
  5. I’m so glad I’ve recently found your blog. I love resolution #2. I hate talking on the phone. I got a voicemail from a friend tonight. He said, “Call me back. Kidding. You never call back.” And good luck with #7!

    Comment by tina on December 29, 2010
  6. Grammar lessons for the world! Wheeeeee!

    Good luck with your RESOLUTING!

    Comment by AmazingGreis on December 29, 2010
  7. While you’re working on its and it’s, can you also take care of to and too? :)

    Comment by alison on December 29, 2010
  8. Ali. You are awesome. Resoluting is not a word.

    Secondly, I see no reason to bake the cookies or cook the brownies. ;)

    Other than that I completely support all your resoluting.

    xox

    Comment by heidikins on December 30, 2010
  9. Happy New Year!

    I love your blog.

    Comment by Linda on December 30, 2010
  10. You’ve arrived when you have a troll, Martell.

    Happy New Year!

    Comment by Kristabella on December 30, 2010
  11. Stop watching Grey’s? Oh this one saddens me. Why?

    I hope you guys have a great New Year.

    Comment by Issa on December 30, 2010
  12. I applaud your resoluting. And call me someday. I like to talk on that phone thingy.

    Comment by Avitable on December 30, 2010
  13. When I read #7, I read “Teach people how to you ME and when it’s appropriate.” and I thought “hmmm that sounds like something I should be teaching.

    Then, I re-read it.
    Whole different sentence the 2nd time.

    Comment by Becky on December 30, 2010
  14. oh, good list. And I love the resoluting to block. I might put this one into practice this year as well.

    Comment by designHer Momma on December 30, 2010
  15. I am shocked that you don’t have the perfect LBD.

    Comment by Mandi Bone on December 30, 2010
  16. OMG, that ever-elusive LBD!!! Good luck! and Happy New Year, darling! xo

    Comment by Nenette on January 1, 2011
  17. I have semi-recently discovered that I really do like the phone. Especially when I’m using my headphones because then I can talk and fold my laundry, and talking to friends while folding laundry is infinitely better than just standing there scowling while folding laundry.

    Also: STOP watching Grey’s Anatomy? NEVER.

    (Ha!)

    Comment by Kerri Anne on January 2, 2011
  18. I could get with these. Yep. :)

    Comment by sweetsalty kate on January 2, 2011
  19. You may need a roll of duct tape to keep yourself from singing along to Ke$sha… I fail miserably in that department.

    Comment by Dre on January 3, 2011
  20. [...] yes, according to Ali Martel, resoluting is to in fact a word. A word that she made up. And now, I am borrowing [...]

    Pingback by Reviewing and Resoluting « The Lost Years on February 18, 2013
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