November 16 10

Several of my best friends and family members are not on Facebook. It’s their right, I suppose, to be ANTI-Facebook. Maybe they want to stick it to Mark Zuckerberg or maybe they think it’s a waste of time (to see what your friends you have lost touch with are up to and how many cute kids they have and whether or not your ex aged as well as you did and what happened to that guy who was in your class in third grade) or maybe they just don’t know how to use it (MOM), but, honestly, they need to get their asses on Facebook. It’s not COOL to not be on Facebook. For real, it’s not.

“Ali! I feel like I have absolutely no idea what’s going on in your life?”

Wait. WHAT? Really?

I mean, come on. I am public. I mean, you can google my name and all sorts of fun stuff comes up. If you want to know what I ate for lunch today, what was said in my office today, what color sweater I am wearing today and what time I showed up for carpool, that information is at your fingertips. It’s almost harder to NOT know what’s going on in my life than to know. I am an open blog book.

“Oh, daughter of mine? Can you do me a favor? When you cut your son’s hair ALL OFF, can you please make sure that you send me a picture of it so I don’t have to find out from my friends who found out from Facebook?”

Wait. WHAT? Really?

I mean, come on. I am at the salon. I take a picture with my iphone. I quickly twitpic and send to Facebook. In seconds, everyone near and dear to me is all, “Oh my god! Where did his hair go? He looks like a different person! I love it! I hate it! Just when I thought he couldn’t get any cuter!” Facebook and Twitter are just a fantastic way to share important information with a lot of people at one time. It was the easiest way to tell people that my father was in the hospital and that I was rushing off to Atlanta.

140 characters or less tells you exactly what you need to know.

Obviously, it’s also a good way to share completely useless information too, such as the fact that I want to own a pair of cowboy boots and that someone at my son’s birthday party thinks that Indianapolis is a country in Asia and that I can’t stop watching shows about little and that I really want to see that Burlesque movie or that I used a black sharpie on the heels of my black boots and that cows cannot vomit and that I cannot handle people who wear their Blackberries in holsters.

It’s a good way to share all the pictures I take. It’s a good way to share all the places I go, and all the places I am planning to go. It’s a good way to share the super cool things I am doing at work.

My mother doesn’t know any of this information.

My best friends don’t know any of this information.

And that’s not cool. Not at all.

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  1. My mom should not be on facebook, because she’d get hacked every 3.2 seconds, and then be all “I don’t know why I’m sending out all those links, your kids must have done something to my computer” even though my kids aren’t within 2000 miles of her computer anymore. Or when facebook shrunk the font, she would have called me in a panic. “I’m going blind, I woke up this morning and I can’t see the type on the facebook anymore”. I have friends however, with cute babies, that need to get their butts on facebook like yesterday.

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    Comment by Lorna on November 16, 2010
  2. While it’s totally awesome having the important people in your life be online so they’re up to speed with everything you’re doing, it’s also totally horrible sometimes, too! My sister reads my tweets and I get phone calls everyday about something or other… lots of eye rolling. Lots of questioning. I couldn’t even tweet about when I crashed into
    a concrete post in my parking garage at work last week, because I wasn’t ready for my family to know it happened again… Oh, the problems! ;)

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    Comment by Loukia on November 16, 2010
  3. Alas, I was one who adamantly refused to join Facebook. I thought I wouldn’t have time to keep up with it. I finally joined, mostly to stop the incessant begging of my loved ones. It was the BEST DECISION EVER. Now I have friends and loved ones who won’t join Facebook (professional reasons, just don’t care, etc.) and now I’m the beggar. The circle is complete.

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    Comment by Angela on November 16, 2010
  4. You know what would suck? If my MIL was on facebook. I would have to bite my tongue (fingers?) a lot. Although she can’t work her DVD player and we still get calls about the VCR so, thank god, it’s looking unlikely. And you’re absolutely right, most of my family IS on facebook, so it doesn’t even occur to me to notify the ones who aren’t about stuff.

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    Comment by Jessica on November 16, 2010
  5. You see…my in laws are on facebook, and my stepmom and siblings and cousins etc. and I’m okay with that. I’m comfortable with what I put online. If they aren’t comfortable with it…they don’t have to read my links or read everything I put out. I have been blogging since 2004…my family members KNOW that I’m a pretty public person.

    But I’d really like my mom to be able to see pictures of her grandchildren. It would be much easier that way. heh.

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    Comment by ali on November 16, 2010
  6. So you’re saying your best friends don’t live inside the cloud with you? Hmmm….I see….well okay then. I understand. ;)

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    Comment by Hockeymandad on November 16, 2010
  7. um. I don’t. Cloud?

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    Comment by ali on November 16, 2010
  8. I feel the exact same way. My online presence isn’t my whole life, so there’s always more to talk about and discuss, but it covers enough of the basics that if you (meaning my friends and family) would just go on goddamn Facebook, we could skip some unnecessary steps.

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    Comment by Avitable on November 16, 2010
  9. Yes, and thank you! I approve this message.

    xox

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    Comment by heidikins on November 16, 2010
  10. A big, hearty AMEN. I get so frustrated when people have no idea what I’m up to. It’s on the Internet, people.

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    Comment by Angella on November 16, 2010
  11. Yeah, in this day and age, you should be online, whether on FB or what not, to just see what’s going on in people’s lives. It’s just easier that way.

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    Comment by Kristabella on November 16, 2010
  12. My SIL often posts photos of my nieces and nephew to FB and then texts them to my mother, which my mother then forwards to me. Which is ANNOYING because I’ve already seen them all.

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    Comment by Rhi on November 16, 2010
  13. Tell me you slapped the person that thought Indianapolis was a country?

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    Comment by Belle on November 16, 2010
  14. Belle…considering it was an 8-year-old child…who is not my own..NO, I didn’t slap him. heh.

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    Comment by ali on November 16, 2010
  15. My sister-in-law is always all, “where have you been lately? Did you bring pictures of your most recent trip?” And my MIL and I are always, in unison, responding: “Read her/my blog!” She doesn’t get the whole concept of the Internets.

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    Comment by Camels & Chocolate on November 16, 2010
  16. if it wasn’t for Facebook, I’d have no idea what was happening in my family. And the people who refuse to participate are the ones I know nothing about. Technology made life better people, EMBRACE IT!

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    Comment by Erica on November 16, 2010
  17. I feel the same way… And did you notice that the people who aren’t on Face Book seem so against it? I don’t understand…. Most of them don’t understand it, but yet act like it is the devil….

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    Comment by Hilary on November 17, 2010
  18. Ali – I totally worship at your Altar of Totally Right-On. Seriously. My BFF has a FB account but NEVER uses it. Neither does my sister. And yes my family have found out stuff through my 2ND COUSIN who IS on my FB. Like duh. Like you – I’m an open book. And dare I say, YOU probably know more about what’s going on with ME than my family does. Because you’re on my FB Friend’s List. Tada. P.S. Because I couldn’t resist: your kids are too gorj. Too bad I don’t live in T.O. anymore – Josh would totally get on with Jeremy & Toby in their own Star Wars Realm. LOL And Miss M. could rock out with Bella to Justin Bieber. Actually, maybe not. More LOL

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    Comment by Heidi on November 17, 2010
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