August 30 10

Okay. So, here it is. Plain and simple.

Smokey, this is not ‘Nam. This is bowling dessert. There are rules.

The Fruit Commandments.

Rule #1: Fruit does not belong in dessert.

(Which is always awesome when you have a husband has two food blogs and decides that every time he makes desserts it has to be something like baked peaches or some sort of concoction using nectarines. NECTARINES, people! I mean, really, is it that hard to make a cinnamon roll? Or some red velvet cake? Or some plain old sheet cake? I am easy to please.)

(NECTARINES. In dessert. Vomit.)

There are, of course, exceptions to this rule. I mean, even the United States Constitution has the Bill of Rights.

So, official exceptions include.

1. Key lime pie. Delicious.

2. Apple pie. because, well, it’s an institution. But, I pick out the apples, because I am a complicated person.

3. Orange poppy cake.

4. Lemon meringue pie. Lemon poppy muffins. :Lemon hamentashen. Lemon anything, really.

5. Banana bread.

6. Blueberry muffins.

7. Pumpkin anything. But now that I think about it, I have no idea if pumpkins are fruits or vegetables. And then I went and looked it up and became even more confused because now it seems like squash might be a fruit too because technically, I think, if it has seeds, it’s considered a fruit…but there was something about ovaries of plants in there and I got skeeved out.

Now…don’t get me started on rule #2 (fruit does not belong in salad) and rule #3 (fruit does not belong in alcoholic beverages) because it’ll probably scare you away for good.

On the other hand, though, I am a huge fan of the vegetable.

Even the ones nobody eats, like brussels sprouts.

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  1. The only booze I can drink is the kind with fruit in it!

    I know you guys like sipping your scotch like Jon Hamm. I’ll take a pineapple coconut martini.

    [Reply]

    Comment by Avitable on August 30, 2010
  2. Sadly, I’m a fan of fruit in desserts, salads and alcoholic beverages.

    But I still love you!

    [Reply]

    Comment by Darcey on August 30, 2010
  3. I love you too, even though I disagree with you.

    [Reply]

    Comment by jennifer on August 30, 2010
  4. I completely disagree with you on almost all points, but I still think your great!

    FYI – corn is not a veggie.

    [Reply]

    Comment by Swiggy on August 30, 2010
  5. I am a big fan of veggies, I can take or leave fruit in desert, but I like fruit in alcoholic drinks, but love fruit in salads!
    .-= Hilary´s last blog ..If you try and don’t succeed- try- try again…or just give up! =-.

    [Reply]

    Comment by Hilary on August 30, 2010
  6. And this is why we are friends. EVERY TIME I have the “fruit DOES NOT belong in dessert” argument with people, I want to call you and be like “I am not alone, people!”

    Although, the only fruit I don’t mind in alcoholic drinks is in sangria. But I don’t eat the fruit. I just allow it in the glass.

    [Reply]

    Comment by Kristabella on August 30, 2010
  7. mmm fruit. not gonna lie, i can have fruit in pretty much anything. yum.
    .-= Katie´s last blog ..In which you may count how many times I say the word “pregnant” =-.

    [Reply]

    Comment by Katie on August 30, 2010
  8. Clearly, you know where my opinion lies… (see Comment Luv)
    .-= Gav´s last blog ..Roasted Georgia Peaches Stuffed with Pecan Streusel and Canadian Maple Cream =-.

    [Reply]

    Comment by Gav on August 30, 2010
  9. And here I thought I was the only one who liked brussel sprouts! And cherry in dessert-vomit!

    [Reply]

    Comment by Arica on August 30, 2010
  10. I’m glad you didn’t say vegetables don’t belong in dessert because hello? Carrot cake. Holy yum.
    .-= Hamlet’s Mistress´s last blog ..One of the boys… =-.

    [Reply]

    Comment by Hamlet's Mistress on August 30, 2010
  11. Gav’s comment made me laugh.

    Fruit/vegetable argument aside, I have to confess that pumkpin ANYTHING makes me gag.

    Except for salted pumpkin seeds. Yum.

    [Reply]

    Comment by Angella on August 30, 2010
  12. Trifle, strawberry pie, and — OMG — BANANAS FOSTER!!! I love my fruit in everything, sistah! But I’m from the Philippines where you can’t take 2 steps without becoming painfully intimate with a fruit tree/bush. Fruit is in my blood. Literally! :)

    [Reply]

    Comment by Nenette on August 31, 2010
  13. I love Brussels sprouts. Now, do you eat corn on the cob typewriter or toilet paper style?

    [Reply]

    Comment by Chris on August 31, 2010
  14. I can make “supposedly” delicious brussel sprouts. Of course I don’t eat them.

    And I agree with Nenette, bananas foster OMG. And pretty much any dessert with cherries in it is the best thing ever.

    Oh and how much do I love fruit in ice cream?

    I dare even go as far as saying that I prefer desserts that have fruit in them. Although I will say that pumpkin pie is gross. Pumpkin bread however… NOM.

    [Reply]

    Comment by Carrisa on September 1, 2010
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