so, the real question here (other than the obvious ‘where’s my bloody tan?’ and ‘why in the hell is my hair so damn BIG?’) is, well, what’s your poison here…is it the pretty, pretty personal trainer man or the beautiful, beautiful shoe?
The lovely Anissa and I had the pleasure of drooling at attending the Wine, Women & Shoes event benefiting Children’s Healthcare of Atlanta. It was such a lovely event, even if the only thing I could afford to do was feel the softness of the way-too-out-of-my-budget shoes and explain to the personal trainers why I didn’t already have a trainer.
But here’s the thing with me and shoes.
(don’t hate me)
I like them. oh, yes, I like them. BUT, like 99.9% of the female population, I don’t loooove them. I mean, I probably would love shoes, if I could have a $40,000 Carrie Bradshaw collection and not feel guilty about buying names like Choo, or Louboutin or Blahnik.
Instead, my mind automatically thinks frugally…and I’m all mom-like, “do you know how many hours I have to work to afford $700 shoes?!??!” and “do you know how many other ways I could spend that $700?” and “I could get myself a fake tan and good product to make my hair less giant and pay for that personal trainer”
so, yes, last summer, when my sister’s friend Ilka arrived with a bag o’ Jimmy Choo
after I pet them and fondled them and sniffed them…I realized that I would totally be kicked out of the SHOE RELIGION. I mean, I get why women love shoes. I understand what a pair of heels does to a woman’s body and legs and ass. I spend many a night nursing my aching feet from hours of walking around in uncomfortable shoes simply to look good (or to appear taller than I am. Hi, I’m Ali. I am a midget). I get that shoes look beautiful on a woman of ANY size, so when women feel un-skinny, shoes still make them look good. I get these things. Totally get.
but, you see, I NEVER notice a person’s shoes. EVER. I notice a woman’s hair, her clothing, her makeup, her purse, her jewels, pretty much everything, but my eyes never wander all the way down to the shoe area. and if they do, I probably couldn’t tell you if they bought those shoes for $50 or $500. And I am way more inclined to ask you where you got your shapewear than where you got your shoes (because I am KLASSY) or where you got your camera strap or your headband or your cardigan or your necklace or your jeans.
and to be honest with you…I live in Canada, where for ten months of the year shoes are called BOOTS. and also? I get more compliments on a pair of fake leather purple shoes that I bought at Old Navy for less than $20 than I do on any other of the 75 pairs of shoes in my closet.
So, that’s that. there’s my confession to you. Oh, and while we are confessing…I don’t know anything about wine either, but that’s an entirely different post.
We can still be friends, right?