I’m just warning you before I start rambling that at the end of this post I will be posting a video that you, like I did, will probably find hilarious. and you will likely watch it more than once to see if, well, if it IS, indeed a wiener (well, I know that FADKOG will, at least) (and my sister who watched the movie yesterday, which is kind of freaky and creepy…but that’s how my sister and I are, scarily alike. I mean, what are the chances that we’d both randomly watch Teen Wolf on a random sunday?) anyway, I’m just warning you up front that you don’t have to read the whole post…because that’s always the way, yes? I write something important or weird or bizarre and then there’s the video or I say the words Mad Men and every single comment is about Mad Men – which, oh my god, two episodes into season 1 and I completely and totally understand why everyone only wants to talk about Mad Men…because MAD MEN!
ps. Does Meat Loaf Aday think people are going to take him more seriously because he’s added the Aday to his name? I mean, his name is Meat Loaf, for Chrissakes.
So, the husband is back in town. which means I get to abuse his kindness enjoy him for the next twenty days until I have to put him back on a plane to Toronto again. Yes, this is our life now. Ten days without him, 20 days with him. Which, really, in theory is not all that bad until your best friend MURPHY shows up with his effing LAW and everything that can go wrong actually does. So, he’s home.
he’s not a professional handyman, he just plays one on TV.
But, he’s not just all about fixing things. He’s about fixing me. A very tired, very broken ME. He showed up with a giant box of these
and hired a babysitter so we could go out on Saturday night for a super fancy dinner at Cheesecake Factory. Yes, kids, I AM being sarcastic when I use the words fancy and cheesecake factory together in the same sentence. But, that’s how I am…super classy. The husband told me to pick anywhere I wanted to go, and that was my pick. Because, well, I tend to think with my sweet tooth and….well…I think this speaks for itself…
thank you Stefanie, whoever you are, for creating this red velvet cake with cream cheese icing meets cheesecake deliciousness. my ass thanks you.
And having him home means that I can do necessary things that I have been putting off because well, you remember how my last visit to Victoria’s Secret ended, yes? But, buying new brassieres was an absolute necessity but when I walked into the store and was talking to the lady who worked there who was surprisingly nice – more than likely because my children weren’t playing the PENIS game – started giggling, guffawing and laughing when I tried to convince her that I was a 34C.
“Oh, honey, you are no more than a 32B”
which she followed up with
and she was right. my god, my boobies are gone. and let me just say for the record that losing weight is all kinds of fun…but losing weight in your bosom and not really anywhere else…NO FUN AT ALL.
and now, here it is….just for you….the VERY BEST THING TO PASS THE CENSORS EVER…(watch the dude in the bleachers). It’s way better than the Star Wars storm trooper hitting his head…
and some people will try to convince you that this is a woman…but I am sticking to my ‘it’s totally a peen’ theory.