August 13 09

rrod

our Xbox suffered the RROD, which to the layman means the red ring of death, which to the layman means “oh hai, Ali. I’m afraid I can’t do what you’ve asked of me. Please to be visiting a UPS store to be sending that shit back to me for maintenance. also? neener, neener!!”

I realize you are now scratching your heads all “what? Playing the occasional Star Wars Lego game with your son and indulging your husband by playing along to Guitar Hero Aerosmith when you only know three songs does NOT make you a gamer. Plus, also? don’t you have a wii? and a brand new DSi? How many damn game consoles do you need, woman? wow. AND you’ve never cleaned a toilet? my god,  you are spoiled!”

But, did you know that an XBOX can be used for so, so, so much more?

oh yes it can.

We can stream our downloaded stuff from our computer through the xbox. let that soak in, because it is just the fanciest thing to ever exist. Because here, in Atlanta, we have a lovely large TV in our bedroom and some DirectTV (thanks, Pops!) but we suffer from lack-of-dvr-ed-ness. I know. I know. So, because of this, I am Ali and I am a downloader.

So, we are watching OZ on our laptop, which means that the flying wiener is, um, way too up close and personal for my taste. Also, we have much downloaded Mad Men to watch.

(and don’t get me started on all the children’s movies and TV shows that we can’t access right now. YOU try explaining to your screaming 4-year-old that NO! You can’t watch the show you want to watch. You have to watch Barney even though I you hate Barney and Barney makes me you cry just a little bit)

So, I am watching a lot of The Food Network. oh. my. god.

Oh wait…I am also watching random videos like this one that Miss Metalia introduced me to and seriously, I have watched about 87 times since last night.

oh yes, Baby, she’s just a Jewish girl from New York with a hook nose…

AND THIS COMMERCIAL ZOMG. one would think this was a joke….but alas, it’s not and seriously, Jimmy Dean? seriously?

But yes, back to the Food Network. which, PS, is a total disaster for me because I realized that vacation eating when you aren’t actually on vacation is NOT a good thing and when I realized I couldn’t get dressed because I was too porked out to squeeze my body into my sausage casings clothing, something drastic needed to happen, i.e., I needed to sloooooow down with the donuts and the giant pretzels and the pizza and THE BISCUITS AND PUMPKIN BUTTER and the cookies and candy and ohmigodthishouseisfilledwithcontainersfullofcandy. So, yes, am watching what I eat, which kind of makes me want to cry.

and when I’m watching shows about food, it kind of makes me want to throw things. or at least eat CARBS and SUGAR. and let’s not even talk about what the episode of Good Eats about FROSTING did for me. I may have actually thrown something.

So I have been watching it all, Chopped and and Diners, Drive-ins and Dives and Ace of Cakes and Dinner: Impossible and Good Eats and Unwrapped and, my new favorite:

The Best Thing I Ever Ate.

best thing

which, is, TOTAL FOOD PORN. seriously. on each episide, the Food Network personalities reveal their favorite things to eat and where you can go to get them. and now, obviously, I want to visit just about every single city in the US to sample all this deliciousness.

Which of course gets me to thinking (about food…welcome to my life!) about what the best thing I ever ate was and it’s impossible to come up with ONE thing…there are the mini red velvet cupcakes with cream cheese frosting that my stepmom buys every Chrismukah, there is the homemade-by-the-husband smoked meat, there is the Cheesecake Factory eggplant sandwich, Ken’s Diner’s Burger Buddy, the pizza I had in the village that one time, the chocolate rugalach (it’s your favorite word, kristabella!) from the Marzipan bakery in Israel (the ones that caused me to gain 29 pounds while in Israel) and Grodzinsky’s iced shortbread cookies, Salad King’s red curry, Mengrei’s taro rolls, CPK’s mac and cheese.

What about you? best thing you ever ate?

(seriously, XBOX people out there in Texas? please send my xbox back to me….or you will see me this spring on The Biggest Loser)

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  1. You are the 3rd person today that I’ve read who is suffering the RROD. That sucks.

    As far as the best thing I’ve ever eaten…?
    Gosh, like you, too many to count.

    But up there on the list:
    - Grandma’s chicken noodle soup with meatballs and chicken croquettes
    - Tom Kah Gai from Bangkok Thyme
    - Grandma/Mom’s stuffed cabbage rolls
    - Delmonico bison steak from Ted’s Montana Grill
    - Bf’s corn on the cob

    [Reply]

    Comment by Darcey on August 13, 2009
  2. That Dirty Dancing video was seriously the best thing I have seen in a long time! Dirty Dancing is one of my all time (FOR SHAME) favorite movies! I LOVED THIS VIDEO! I laughed until I had tears! Thanks for posting!

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    Comment by Amy on August 13, 2009
  3. That was the best Dirty Dancing remak EVER! Dirty Dancing and Channing Tatum are among my favorite things! Great combo

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    Comment by Kalle on August 13, 2009
  4. “What do you mean, balancing on a piece of shit?” HAHAHAAA

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    Comment by metalia on August 13, 2009
  5. Well, you totally lost me on the technical probs you are having at Casa Martell (I have no technical skillz, yo, and that ipod I got for my birthday in Dec is still sitting in its box because huh? I can’t program it, and also, I still use a Walkman)…but the best thing I ever ate was a grilled cheese sandwich from Barney Greengrass in NYC.

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    Comment by Jen on August 13, 2009
  6. I hope reading this didn’t just jinx my XBox. My family would be devastated without our XBox and Lego Star Wars. Yes, that was actually said in complete seriousness. DEVASTATED.

    I love the Food Network. So, so much. Although I usually only watch the actual cooking shows: Paula Deen, Rachael Ray, Guy Fieri, all of them, any of them. If they’re cooking, I’m watching. You would think after watching all of that, I would be able to cook a decent meal. You would think wrong.

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    Comment by C @ Kid Things on August 13, 2009
  7. Thank you for explaining what RROD is because I was very confused.

    Rugalach, and the way Emily says it, will always make me laugh.

    Man, best thing I’ve ever eaten? That is TOUGH! I love food, but I don’t know if I could pick one thing. The guacamole at Adobo Grill in Chicago would be high on that list. The pizookie at Oregano’s in AZ. Gino’s East pizza. Garrett’s cheese popcorn. Man, I could go on and on.

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    Comment by Kristabella on August 13, 2009
  8. We recently discovered The Best Thing I Ever Ate also, and it is AWESOME! Makes me so hungry every time.

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    Comment by Rebecca (Bearca) on August 13, 2009
  9. OH man that dirty dancing video is awsome!!!!

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    Comment by Sensibly Sassy on August 13, 2009
  10. Each time I garner control of the TV remote, it is switched immediately over to Food Network. If that channel was nothing but Ace of Cakes and Diners, Drive ins and Dives 24-7, I’d be just fine with that. I seriously have had dreams involving Duff and Geoff that shouldn’t ever be spoken of or replicated in fondant.

    In college, I worked at a cinnamon roll shop. I’m pretty sure, years later, parts of my thighs are still remembering that time fondly.
    .-= fadkog´s last blog ..if i’d just told him most of his toys came from there, it would have made sense a lot quicker =-.

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    Comment by fadkog on August 13, 2009
  11. I read about the RROD, but I never read about anything similar to the PS3 or Wii. Is it an Xbox exclusive issue?

    Also, do you have to pay them to fix it?

    [Reply]

    Comment by SciFi Dad on August 13, 2009
  12. You can get movies to stream tp Xbox and some are free! Also, there are great cooking shows on PBS of Saturdays, Ming, Martha Stuart and others. Just don’t eat while watching!
    (your) Anon

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    Comment by Linda on August 13, 2009
  13. I’m laughing my ass off right now. Not at the RROD though, because that is just sad.

    Fried rice from BeniHauna. Fettuccini Alfredo from Louise’s in West LA…they make their own pasta, from scratch. Orange cupcakes from Sprinkles Cupcakes. My aunt’s German Potato salad and my mom’s BBQ chicken.

    Am starving and possibly drooling now.

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    Comment by Issa on August 13, 2009
  14. We stream Netflix on our Xbox, so I’m feeling your pain. We had to send ours back due to the RROD last year. It was rough without it…
    .-= Miss E´s last blog ..Miss E MIA =-.

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    Comment by Miss E on August 13, 2009
  15. I wish we lived in the U.S. just for the Food Network. Food Network Canada sucks.

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    Comment by Amberlea on August 13, 2009
  16. I LOVE the Food Network. Especially the Naked Chef. Wait, he actually wears clothes. Oh. Never mind.

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    Comment by Pat on August 13, 2009
  17. I died a thousand times watching that Dirty Dancing spoof.

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    Comment by Anissa@FreeAnissa on August 13, 2009
  18. OH I love the food network..Diners, Drive-in’s & Dives…is my favourite show…What is different about Food Network and Food Network Canada??

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    Comment by Jen S on August 13, 2009
  19. The Food Network, TLC and HGTV…my TV porn!

    Why is it that they always tell you about some great food and then it ends up that you can ONLY get it in the US?! GAH! It’s so damn frustrating!
    .-= K*OS! (Keep On S’mye´s last blog ..My Little Helper =-.

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    Comment by K*OS! (Keep On S'mye on August 13, 2009
  20. HA! Love the Dirty Dancing!
    Also I am so jealous of your American Food Network.

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    Comment by Haley-O on August 13, 2009
  21. Since you’re now an Atlantian, I cannot stress this enough: Marietta Diner. GO! Every favorite thing I’ve ever eaten was eaten there. (Plus they were totally on Diners, Drive-ins, and Dives, which makes them twice as awesome.)

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    Comment by MonsteRawr on August 14, 2009
  22. Please, what is this Red Ring of Death of which you speak?
    We are about to plunk down considerable cash to fulfill the boy child’s 14th birthday desire and if the Xbox breaks, I may cry and drink more.

    Favorite food? Oh that would be the Korean BBQ place.
    .-= Catootes´s last blog ..oh yes, i forgot =-.

    [Reply]

    Comment by Catootes on August 14, 2009
  23. Ahhh, the RROD… I am terribly familiar with that.

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    Comment by Mari on August 14, 2009
  24. Flying wiener and ‘neener, neener’ make me giggle more than I should.

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    Comment by Angie [A Whole Lot of Nothing] on August 17, 2009
  25. HAHAHAHAHAHA.

    Okay I can’t stop laughing (at work) about that video.

    Makes me like Channing Tatum even more.

    [Reply]

    Comment by Kaleigha on August 18, 2009
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