March 20 09

i’m certainly not high fashion. that much is clear. i mean, you all, i went out last night in what seemed like a good outfit. skinny jeans (jbrands. love) a black shirt and black boots. only, i was spending so much time BEFORE i went out at 10pm panicking about being able to stay up UNTIL 10pm to go out, that i didn’t realize i was wearing a white bra underneath my black shirt (which, yes, i realize is not as bad as black bra under white shirt, but under the lights of Fashion House? GAH)

oh yes i did.

i am ALL class.

other classy things i did while i was at Fashion Week last night:

lost my cell phone

popped a button on my lovely jbrand skinnies

broke my favorite purse

but here’s the thing. sure, i may have been at an event where i was very fish-out-of-water. also, i’m sure i was the only person there who was neither 5″10 nor flamboyant. but i was there. I got to go to fashion week.

you probably shouldn’t really feel bad for me.

Yesterday, i got an email from Becca, the world’s loveliest person AND web designer (she’s making me an ever-so-fancy review blog…so i can review lots of shit for you! awesome!) and it said this:

I knew you were working it out at FASHIONWEEKZOMGAWESOMENESSFOREVER! I’m so excited that you got to go; you deserve it to be there and will rock it. You are seriously my epitome of, like, having it all. You know how you read those novels and the heroine has three adorable kids and a hot husband and a closet of adorable clothes and is 100 pounds and also works as a book publisher and also jetsets to Fashion Week? And you think, who the hell is really like that? YOU.

(ps. i hope she doesn’t mind me posting this)

and it really got me thinking.

if someone tells me my kids are cute, i’m always all “yeah, well, you should see them at bedtime! monsters!”

if somone tells me i have adorable clothing, i’m always all “are you high? i have the worst clothing and i only shop at the same store and i always look exactly the same”

if someone tells me it looks like Olga and the gym are working, i’m always all “What? i’m so HUGE! look at me! i popped a friggin’ button on my jeans!”

see where i’m going with this? i have issues, clearly, with accepting a compliment. and accepting that, really, my life? IS AWESOME.

i spend a lot of time thinking that there are people who are prettier, thinner, smarter, more successful, funnier, better photographers, better writers, better editors, better cooks, better moms, better just-well-everything. i spend a lot of time feeling like i’m floundering; that i take on too much. because i can’t remember the permission slips and i always forget to make the play date with Maggi and i have to listen to Emily read her book on tsunamis to me while i put on my make-up to go out to an event. and i leave too early in the morning to know that my nanny is putting Josh in his SISTER’S JEANS.  some days i need three coffees to make it through the day. and cookie dough. i eat a lot of cookie dough. and you know, take an occasional xanax.

but when i get emails like that one from Becca, it is a huge wake up call because oh my god you guys, my life is AMAZING. really, it is. (cough.FASHION WEEK. cough)

and i’m pretty sure that even though i forget permission slips and playdates, there are at least three little monsters out there who think what i do is pretty awesome… (and not only because i get them free  [insert company name here] books either…)

coke

even if i’m totally old and think that going out at 10pm on a work night is TOO LATE when you know, there are some pajamas and some 30 Rock calling my name…

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  1. I always marvel at how much you do too;enjoy this wonderful spring weekend! and 10pm is way too late to be out on a weeknight, especially a Thursday, the best TV night there is!

    [Reply]

    Comment by Maria on March 20, 2009
  2. You are pretty awesome.

    [Reply]

    Comment by Captain Dumbass on March 20, 2009
  3. you are totally awesome.

    [Reply]

    Comment by hillary on March 20, 2009
  4. Becca is right. If you weren’t so awesome and nice and funny and my friend, it would be so easy to hate you. :)

    Because you’re hot and have cute, funny kids and an awesome hubby and are skinny and funny and nice and AWESOME.

    Kristabellas last blog post..Movin’ On Up…?

    [Reply]

    Comment by Kristabella on March 20, 2009
  5. seriously…this is SO not what this post was about. it was about my realizing that even though at times i’m a shitty mom and i fall asleep at my desk…i’m OKAY WITH THAT.

    i might take this post down now…

    [Reply]

    Comment by ali on March 20, 2009
  6. No! Don’t take it down!

    I’m like you where I suck at taking compliments (Deflect much, Angella?) and sometimes we need to sit back and just say Thank You instead, you know?

    Because you’re awesome. BASK IN THE LOVE.

    Angellas last blog post..Annoying Things You Do

    [Reply]

    Comment by Angella on March 20, 2009
  7. I think you are awesome, and lovely, and that’s no sunshine blowing, either. It’s hard for me to internalize compliments, too. Especially about things that are important to be, and things that I struggle with. Here’s to both of us getting better at that! xo

    [Reply]

    Comment by Kerri Anne on March 20, 2009
  8. Fine! I think you’re horrible and you kind of smell.

    Is that better?

    Kristabellas last blog post..Movin’ On Up…?

    [Reply]

    Comment by Kristabella on March 20, 2009
  9. …and in the end, that’s what matters.

    Also? Free books rock. My kids just wonder why so many of their’s don’t have covers.

    (I just spent five minutes wondering if that ‘their’s’ up there should have an apostrophe or not. I used to be an editor! Gah! It feels wrong!)(but my kids want to go to the library, and I’m back to that whole ‘…and in the end’ part, so…)

    fadkogs last blog post..from awesome to awkward – a beginner’s guide

    [Reply]

    Comment by fadkog on March 20, 2009
  10. Anytime you or anyone around you starts questioning your own awesomeness, all you have to say is “FASHION WEEK, BITCH!” Equally effective is the simplistic, “Fuck you!”

    [Reply]

    Comment by MonsteRawr on March 21, 2009
  11. I can vouch for the totally awesome part. And I’m an unbiased source, too.

    [Reply]

    Comment by Camels & Chocolate on March 21, 2009
  12. You are not a shitty mom, and we’ve all fallen asleep on our desks at some point. You are awesome, and you’ve been able to accomplish what many of us can’t due to lack of energy, poor juggling skills, and in my case, pure laziness. :)

    But you also show us that it CAN be done. That ‘having it all’ thing. AND staying sane at the end of the day.

    So, just sit there and take all these compliments. :)

    [Reply]

    Comment by Nenette on March 21, 2009
  13. Wait – I cannot past the first paragraph – what’s wrong with a black bra under a white shirt?

    Did not know that that was a nono…is it only something that refers to pale faces maybe? :P

    [Reply]

    ali replied on

    Maria – it’s a WHITE bra under a BLACK shirt. if you take a photo…which is what i was doing at fashion week…the flash brings out the white bra underneath and gives you two giant white globes where your boobs are. NOT NICE, if you ask me. that’s why most people wear black bras under black shirts. no?

    [Reply]

    Comment by Maria on March 21, 2009
  14. i think you’re awesome ;)

    you always have fantastically awesome things happening in your life too!!

    hope you enjoyed fashion week – even if there were a few hiccups!

    [Reply]

    Comment by Bronnie on March 22, 2009
  15. yeah. i’m with maria about the bra thing!

    rainos last blog post..And somehow I still think she’s cute!

    [Reply]

    Comment by raino on March 22, 2009
  16. excellent article, thank you

    [Reply]

    Comment by recettes on March 22, 2009
  17. If I knew how to StumbleUpon something, I’d do it for this post. I’m totally, TOTALLY the same way (shocking!) when it comes to taking a compliment. You ARE awesome and gorgeous and talented, however, and I am proud to call you my friend.

    [Reply]

    Comment by metalia on March 23, 2009
  18. You are awesome! And enjoying being the coolest person in the world to your kids. When they hit their teens, you will long for these days.

    [Reply]

    Comment by WickedStepMom on March 24, 2009
  19. “i spend a lot of time thinking that there are people who are prettier, thinner, smarter, more successful, funnier, better photographers, better writers, better editors, better cooks, better moms, better just-well-everything”

    Yep, that’s just what we were thinking too. Sorry.

    [Reply]

    Comment by Betsy on March 24, 2009
  20. Wow, Betsy. You’re a real fucking bitch aren’t you?

    [Reply]

    Comment by slynnro on March 24, 2009
  21. DEAR BETSY,

    FUCK YOU!

    THANKS,
    THE MANAGEMENT

    [Reply]

    Comment by Giblet on March 25, 2009
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