January 22 09

My sister and i should never be allowed to be alone together. When we are, we do things like get naked and compare our thighs, searching for cellulite (why yes, we were both blessed with lovely eastern european pulkes…oh, yes, the pulkes. thanks, bubbe!). and while those of you without sisters are all head-shaky and “those girls are CRAZY!”, those of you with sisters are nodding your heads in solidarity.

(edited to add: well, it seems that i’ve scared all of you away. in our defense, we were in her apartment getting dressed and she bought this tingly new cellulite cream and we were discussing it. my god, people. i’m not THAT crazy…)

fist bumps, yo!

and while she and i look nothing alike, we come from the same mold. we survived the same childhood. we were tossed across the country between two sets of hardly-around parents. we existed on nothing but boxed mac and cheese and Empire frozen pizza bagels and coke. we were forced into hideous leotards…

ballet

I’ve mentioned before how freakishly similar my sister and i are…even down to our travel toothbrush choices (and any of you who think that having the exact same toothbrush in exactly the same color isn’t random and weird have certainly never been down the dental hygiene aisle at a drug store)

and down to our camera poses…

aliface

chaface

(oh, j.crew gloves! how i miss you! *sigh* lost in a new york cab, likely…)

she, however, can totally keep her eyes OPEN for pictures. i can’t even keep them open when I’M HOLDING THEM OPEN…

eyesopen

we buy the same clothes. the same lip glosses (we are both loving Nars Orgasm right now). the same boots. the same shampoo. oh, also…we can’t play Scrabble on Facebook anymore. because every game ends in a bloody tie. even our brains work the same.

having time with my sister is a gift. a gift i do not get often enough.

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(ps. there’s totally an awesome segue in here…i promise. it’s coming!)

there’s absolutely zero explanation as to why i love this man. He’s not conventionally sexy in any way. i mean, he’s not even remotely good looking. he certainly doesn’t fit with the girlie-men on MY LIST. and he borderlines a little psychoinsane when it comes to politics. but, LOVE, people. (and a shout out for his best actor oscar nomination this morning!)

sean-penn

it’s almost like he uses the force on me.

and you know who else is using the force on me? ED HARRIS.

sad, sad little case in point:

i’m in my hotel room getting dressed and i turn on the tv. showtime. since i don’t have this channel in the great white north. and i see this:

copy

and i think…John Adams? that’s showtime, right? or maybe it’s HBO? i really want to see that…so i keep watching. but, nay, it’s not John Adams…because that unattractive dude in the period clothing and the veryscary hair? he’s Ed Harris. and he’s playing Beethoven. and he’s asking some girl to “bath him” so, i could stop watching right now.

and yet.

i watched the last 20 minutes of the movie. because damn you Ed Harris and your force. and when Metalia was all “Me too! i totally love him too! but not from your crazy Beethoven crap…from The Rock!” i realized that spending time with her is also a gift. a gift i do not get enough. because when you can spend all day with someone in the freezing cold looking for a J.Crew on 5th avenue that totally doesn’t exist (thanks, iphone!) and looking for a starbucks that totally doesn’t exist (whatever, NYC, aren’t you supposed to have a starbucks on every damn corner?!?) AND she takes you to a gigantenormous candy store so you can buy chocolate licorice and then you discover that you share a bizarre love for someone??

edharris

GIFT.

(whatever…i totally stole this picture from her)

(and no, i don’t feel bad about it)

(and yes, we DID write about the same thing today)

(and no, i don’t feel bad about that either)

so, tell me, who unconventionally uses the force on you?

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  1. David Usher uses the force on me. I just bought his new live EP on itunes and I actually BLUSHED when I heard him speaking in between songs. Because I am a crazy lady. I can’t help it though, he is just delicious.

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    Comment by hillary on January 22, 2009
  2. Um, really, you do that cellulite thing? I have a sister and I am SO NOT nodding my head. You are a strange strange girl, Alicia Martell.

    I’m not all about Ed Harris, but I can see that…

    slynnros last blog post..Someone to watch over me. And occasionally, irritate the hell out of me too.

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    Comment by slynnro on January 22, 2009
  3. I’m kind of jealous of you and your sister. My sister and I get along and laugh the same, but it isn’t like what you have. She’s kind of a hillbilly.

    Kristabellas last blog post..Just Say No. To Kool-Aid.

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    Comment by Kristabella on January 22, 2009
  4. Ed was rather dashing in that movie with Viggo, but then there was Viggo…although I have a hard time finding him attractive without his LOTR outfit, sword and wet/ sweatiness.

    Kaleighas last blog post..A sight you thought you’d never see…

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    Comment by Kaleigha on January 22, 2009
  5. Craig Ferguson uses the force on me. I know he’s old and somewhat wrinkly, but good gosh I LOVE HIM! My children refer to him as their new daddy. Try explaining that one to their Sunday School teachers.

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    Comment by AJ on January 22, 2009
  6. For me, it’s Ed Quinn. He moves down and sometimes off my list, but I just have to see him for like 2 seconds on screen when I watch Eureka, and I put him right back on… near the top.
    Stop it, you evil hottie-man!

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    Comment by Nenette on January 22, 2009
  7. I love your sister! And Metalia (though I’ve met your sister but not Metalia…yet).

    Who I do not love? Sean. I’m sorry! I know! But having met him various times and seeing what a self-involved prick he is…I just can’t! But you know who I DO love? Ed! Although, weirdly enough when I think of him, Pollock, Stepmom, and The Truman Show come to mind. Odd, I know, considering I’ve seen the majority of his movies!

    Neil Patrick Harris, Josh Radnor and Jason Segel? Now THEY use the force on me!

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    Comment by Camels & Chocolate on January 22, 2009
  8. Also, I just added The Rock to my Netflix queue. Partially because I was just at Alcatraz, partially b/c you mentioned it.

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    Comment by Camels & Chocolate on January 22, 2009
  9. Good post. I think.
    Nothing registered after “naked and comparing our thighs”.

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    Comment by Giblet on January 22, 2009
  10. Awwww! Right back at you, Ali. I forgot to mention the weirdest force-inducing celebrity ever: James Cromwell. Yes, yes, the farmer from Babe. It’s gross, I know. Although I guess not as gross as Viggo Mortensen’s VESTIGAL TAIL. Ew. Ol’ Vestigal Viggo!

    And C&C: I, too, love Jason Segel and NPH, but just can’t get behind loving Josh Radnor. He seems vaguely….conceited? I dunno.

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    Comment by metalia on January 22, 2009
  11. Alec Baldwin and Gabriel Byrne, who is my sort of Ed Harris for sure. I LUV Gabriel Byrne!
    I have 2 sisters so I totally get it but at least your sis lives in NY so you have a reason to visit such a great city!!!

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    Comment by Maria on January 22, 2009
  12. You and your sister don’t look alike at all, do you! It’s wild! And, you know, I know all about Ed Harris and his FORCE…. Who else….I used to be into Gary Sinise and Jim Belushi…. Not so much anymore. But, that was total force cadet.

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    Comment by Haley-O on January 22, 2009
  13. My sister and I do not get along. AT ALL. We are like North and South. Envious of what you have…

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    Comment by Angella on January 22, 2009
  14. Mark Harmon. I love him. Love.

    I have brothers. But I do have some of the best girlfriends in the world, who I’ve known forever and we are like sisters. So, you didn’t scare me away.

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    Comment by Issa on January 22, 2009
  15. Ed Harris is definitely a heartbreaker. But at the moment Barack Obama has me totally captivated. Imagine my delight about the fact that he is on TV daily!!! :O)

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    Comment by Chris on January 22, 2009
  16. I’m kind of mad for Craig Ferguson. Accents do it for me every time.

    My sister once chucked a knife at me. We were in our 20s. So, yeah. We get along now, but we’re not buying the same toothbrushes, that’s for damn sure!

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    Comment by foradifferentkindofgirl (fadkog) on January 22, 2009
  17. Grissom from CSI. Science is sexy (apparently) :)

    Juliennes last blog post..Pining (I know. It doesn’t look right to me either.)

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    Comment by Julienne on January 22, 2009
  18. I don’t have a sister but I do have a brother who thinks the foothills of CA have monkeys in them.

    I too love Ed Harris. I have loved that man since I saw The Rock.

    Stacies last blog post..Taxi cab confessions – Mommy style

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    Comment by Stacie on January 22, 2009
  19. Smooches
    xoxoxoxo

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    Comment by Charna on January 22, 2009
  20. Me and my older sis are also two peas in a pod. We don’t live in the same city anymore, but we still live in the same headspace. Nothing better than a sister. Nothing.

    kgirls last blog post..Encumbered

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    Comment by kgirl on January 23, 2009
  21. Your post reminded me of my sister and I, although we have never compared cellulite, oh wait, yes we have. ha-ha
    Brett Favre does it for me, although I’m still a little bitter about how everything ended with the Packers.

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    Comment by Muskiemom on January 23, 2009
  22. I TOTALLY get the sister thing! I have two and who better to check your back for zits or give you an honest opinion while shopping. Nothing, NOTHING compares. (kisses to my sis’s!)

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    Comment by Jen Maier on January 23, 2009
  23. I always wished I had a sister- but my cousin who is 8 days older than me- is like the sister I never had. I totally get it, of course she is super skinny and 5″10. I am glad my girls will have each other.

    I can totally see you and metalia being friends- you guys are cut from the same cloth. Great jewish girls! Maybe I could invade one of your coffee searches next time you are in new york!

    Mayas last blog post..

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    Comment by Maya on January 23, 2009
  24. my sis and i are like night and day…for me its all in the voice or accents like antonio banderas..

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    Comment by LAVENDULA on January 23, 2009
  25. Well, I’m glad to see (from reading comments) that I’m not the only one who’s crazy over Craig Ferguson. “I Knoo-ooow” *giggles*

    I love Ed Harris, too. My favorite role he played was in Just Cause. When they’ve got him standing sideways, screaming & foaming at the mouth… holy crap that scene freaks me out every time! If you look just right, you can see the evil radiating from his face.

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    Comment by Text Imps on January 23, 2009
  26. You look great – all of you do. I sometimes wish for a sister or a brother for that matter. You are truly lucky!

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    Comment by Renée aka Mekhismom on January 23, 2009
  27. I recently watched Gordon Ramsay shows for the first time, and the more I’ve watched, the more obsessed I’ve become! Completely agree re: Ed Harris, Craig Ferguson, Mark Harmon. (…And call me crazy, but vestigal tail or not, Viggo is still on my list!)

    I have a great relationship with my older brother and definitely wouldn’t trade him, but part of me still wishes I had had an older sister.

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    Comment by stefka on January 23, 2009
  28. I have a sister, three years younger and we’re not close like you and your sister. We like each other fine, but we’re not at all alike.

    The force on me?

    I know he’s as old as f*ck, but Robert Redford does something to me. I’m not sure if it’s the ruggedness or the insane manliness, but I get all blushy!

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    Comment by Chantal on January 23, 2009
  29. My sis and I don’t really get along, but I have good memories from when we were kids and had some fun a few brief times when the planets were aligned :-)

    Who uses the force on me? Alan Rickman. That voice. Ooooh.

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    Comment by FishyGirl on January 23, 2009
  30. Jeff Goldblum TOTALLY uses the force on me…but he would have to, I’d go willingly :)

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    Comment by LibraryGirl on January 24, 2009
  31. Eddie Vedder…kinda the same force as Sean Penn. And oddly Justin Bobby from The Hills. A little young, but just enough bad ass to be hot!

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    Comment by Suzanne on January 24, 2009
  32. I love love love Sean Penn. And I was glad to hear he went back with Robin Wright (who will always be Buttercup to me).
    Harrison Ford really did for a looooong time, then I really cooled off after he got together with Calista Flockheart (eeww..) however, they seem to be a long term thing so… maybe he’s OK again in my book.

    monstergirlees last blog post..Colorful Summer Girl

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    Comment by monstergirlee on January 24, 2009
  33. That picture of you and Metalia made me laugh when I saw it on her site and then again today.

    Oh! And an embarrassing crush that I forgot about when I commented on Metalia’s post is that I kind of have a thing for Chow Yun Fat. RANDOM. But I can’t help it.

    [Reply]

    Comment by Rebecca (Bearca) on January 24, 2009
  34. Johh Malkovich used to use the force on me, but his force is turning into a shriveled old man so it lost its power.

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    Comment by Mac & Cheese on January 24, 2009
  35. “yes, the pulkes. thanks, bubbe”, you wrote.

    Thanks for the reminder of my own bubbe. I smiled!

    wons last blog post..Friday Fragments

    [Reply]

    Comment by won on January 24, 2009
  36. Is it considered unconventional use of the force when I’ve made a Viggo Mortonsen doll that never leaves my side? Lifesized? Or is that just unconventional?

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    Comment by katie ~ motherbumper on January 25, 2009
  37. I don’t really see the sex appeal of Ed Harris. Now Clive Owen is a whole other story.

    [Reply]

    Comment by regan on January 26, 2009
  38. My sister-in-law once told my husband he will look like Ed Harris when he gets older and he was all “who’s Ed Harris” and Googling him. I think she meant above the brow only (my babe is losing the locks). All I have to do to let him know I will always lust after him is tell him how sexy Ed Harris is!

    Had to share that…my unconventional crush is OMG I am embarrassed….George Strait. Must be the cowboy thing.

    [Reply]

    Comment by Jen on January 28, 2009
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