so, on Friday i gave you all some truths and some lies and asked you to pick out the lies. and basically, either you all suck or I’M THE BEST INTERNET LIAR EVER! because no one got them all right (if it makes you feel better, even my husband didn’t know about the ballet-in-the-bowling alley thing)
almost every single person who commented (thanks for guessing, by the way, you guys are AWESOME) (even those of you who just randomly guessed numbers…you know who you are!) got 2 right and 2 wrong. there were, however, three people who got three right! so, congrats to:
for winning a custom made-just-for-you cd make just for you by me. (awesome) (please email me your addresses. thanks)
1. i took ballet for many, many years. we started in the basement of a bowling alley. we danced – or attempted to dance – while my mom bowled. can you get any more midwest than that? anyhoo. i quit ballet. because they wouldnâ€™t let me wear underwear. oh, the irony. since i donâ€™t wear any underwear at all anymore (except with jeans. which is exactly the opposite of my blogher roomie and snark partner, slynnro). perhaps i should take up ballet again?
it’s ALL true this one. 100%.
ali= total cheesehead
ali’s mom = total cheesehead times infinity
5. i only drink out of disposable containers. i cannot use a plastic cup (ew) or even a glass, even if i watched it come out of the dishwasher. oh, and once someone uses a cup of mine (including my children), i canâ€™t drink out of it again. this stems back to my days when i worked at a camp.
now this one…it’s true. i have serious issues with most drinking receptacles. while all my friends were drinking out of these in camp..
i was being very unkind to the environment and was using plastic water bottles. i will, if forced, use a glass in a restaurant. but i promise, i won’t be happy about it. if i’m at someone’s house, let’s say, for example, my inlaws, i will exercise my right NOT to drink anything over using a glass. and then i come home and drown myself in a disposable cup.
i know. it’s fucked up.
and yes, i know. i suck at saving the enrivonment. but i’m a kick-ass recycler.
and yes, it did stem from my days working at camp. and yes! i did WORK at camp. on purpose. and i did things like ride on a tractor filled with garbage and i did empty the things we called “goody boxes” out of the girls’ bathroom (except, i assure you, there was nothing GOOD about them)
ps. if you get me drunk enough, i’ll probably drink out of anything…
6. i always, always have an elastic hair tie around my wrist, for emergency purposes. i also always have an emergency jaw clip. this, friends, is a jaw clip. the clip spends most of its time clasped to one of my fingers. i guess its a (nervous?) habit. and i have them everywhere. attached to my keys. attached to my purse. attached to my steering wheel. and, of course, attached to my fingers.
yes, yes, yes. ALL true.
7. i judge books by their covers. and sometimes spend hours in bookstores just looking at covers. occasionally, on my way home from work, i will stop at Indigo and then i will buy. not one or two. iâ€™ll probably buy 6 or 7.
most of you guessed this was false, but it’s entirely 100% true. and my husband has the Visa bills to prove it. i spend hours at Indigo, walking up and down the aisles.
a few months ago, i spotted this cover and snatched it right up. i had never heard of the book, or of Marisa de los Santos
but the cover spoke to me. and it ended up being one of the best books i’ve read in a long time.
and i DO like the Vivannos. but i’ve only tried the chocolate banana one. and i loved it. (sorry…i know some of you hated it)
ps. if you ever need books to read, come stop by casa de martell. i have a full library of books for you. like this:
only, unlike the BEAST,Â MY shelves are from IKEA.
8. i do pilates. the old school winsor pilates. and i have them on VHS tapes. my stepdad once bought them off of an infomercial and of course, since heâ€™s not the getupandgo type either, i stole them. and i use them. on a mini-tv-vcr combo in our bedroom.
yes. the only exercise i do involves me, a small tv/vcr combo and certain Mari Winsor who makes me swear like a sailor as i’m trying to get my entire body up into the v-sit position, while she STANDS there, looking all smug. i do two 2-minute videos almost every day…the buns/thighs one and the ab sculpting one. LOVE.
10. my first cousin was the bass player in Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers. until he died, of a drug overdose. the last time i saw him was at his fatherâ€™s – my uncleâ€™s – funeral. the only thing i remember was that he was wearing leather pants.
it’s true. he is – erm, was – my first cousin. and he did wear leather pants to his dad’s funeral. classy, eh?
2.Â i have never smoked a cigarette in my life. ever.
while i firmly, strongly believe that fruit doesn’t belong in alcoholic drinks (with the exception of the margarita) or in cake, i have most certainly smoked cigarettes. i’m not, and haven’t even been, a smoker…but i did partake in the occasional social smoke.
3.Â i am embarrassed to tell you how old i was when i realized that the underground railroad was never actually something that was underground. hint: it wasnâ€™t that long ago.
while i can – sadly – fill out a blank map of the Americas (really, i can!) i most certainly and definitely knew what the underground railroad was. i’m an American. and a history geek. but recently, a friend confessed to not knowing…and then another and then another. it seems a lot of people thought it involved tunnels of sorts. and i promise i don’t judge. i mean, they DID call it ‘underground’
4. i can touch the tip of my tongue to my nose. and curl my tongue in all sorts of fancy shapes, like the flower.
and while i can touch the tip of my tongue to my nose (it’s a really good party trick…really. i CAN even pick my nose with my tongue. ha! my sister can do it too! and my can Emily!)…i cannot do that swirly thing that sir Harry Potter can.
9. i have certain OCD tendencies that surface every once in a while. my kitchen cabinets are ridiculously neat. food products and boxes are arranged BY COLOR and size. if my nanny mistakenly puts things in the wrong place, i canâ€™t leave for work in the morning until iâ€™ve put the items back into the right places.
almost EVERYONE knew this one was a lie. my pantry? a bloody mess. my bathroom sinks? holyhell they are not lined up by anything but mess.
i am professor chaos.
you should see my car. holy shit…my car!