July 28 08

so, on Friday i gave you all some truths and some lies and asked you to pick out the lies. and basically, either you all suck or I’M THE BEST INTERNET LIAR EVER! because no one got them all right (if it makes you feel better, even my husband didn’t know about the ballet-in-the-bowling alley thing)

almost every single person who commented (thanks for guessing, by the way, you guys are AWESOME) (even those of you who just randomly guessed numbers…you know who you are!) got 2 right and 2 wrong. there were, however, three people who got three right! so, congrats to:





for winning a custom made-just-for-you cd make just for you by me. (awesome) (please email me your addresses. thanks)

the truths:

1. i took ballet for many, many years. we started in the basement of a bowling alley. we danced – or attempted to dance – while my mom bowled. can you get any more midwest than that? anyhoo. i quit ballet. because they wouldn’t let me wear underwear. oh, the irony. since i don’t wear any underwear at all anymore (except with jeans. which is exactly the opposite of my blogher roomie and snark partner, slynnro). perhaps i should take up ballet again?

it’s ALL true this one. 100%.

ali= total cheesehead

ali’s mom = total cheesehead times infinity

5. i only drink out of disposable containers. i cannot use a plastic cup (ew) or even a glass, even if i watched it come out of the dishwasher. oh, and once someone uses a cup of mine (including my children), i can’t drink out of it again. this stems back to my days when i worked at a camp.

now this one…it’s true. i have serious issues with most drinking receptacles. while all my friends were drinking out of these in camp..

i was being very unkind to the environment and was using plastic water bottles. i will, if forced, use a glass in a restaurant. but i promise, i won’t be happy about it. if i’m at someone’s house, let’s say, for example, my inlaws, i will exercise my right NOT to drink anything over using a glass. and then i come home and drown myself in a disposable cup.

i know. it’s fucked up.

and yes, i know. i suck at saving the enrivonment. but i’m a kick-ass recycler.

and yes, it did stem from my days working at camp. and yes! i did WORK at camp. on purpose. and i did things like ride on a tractor filled with garbage and i did empty the things we called “goody boxes” out of the girls’ bathroom (except, i assure you, there was nothing GOOD about them)

ps. if you get me drunk enough, i’ll probably drink out of anything…

6. i always, always have an elastic hair tie around my wrist, for emergency purposes. i also always have an emergency jaw clip. this, friends, is a jaw clip. the clip spends most of its time clasped to one of my fingers. i guess its a (nervous?) habit. and i have them everywhere. attached to my keys. attached to my purse. attached to my steering wheel. and, of course, attached to my fingers.

yes, yes, yes. ALL true.

7. i judge books by their covers. and sometimes spend hours in bookstores just looking at covers. occasionally, on my way home from work, i will stop at Indigo and then i will buy. not one or two. i’ll probably buy 6 or 7.

most of you guessed this was false, but it’s entirely 100% true. and my husband has the Visa bills to prove it. i spend hours at Indigo, walking up and down the aisles.

a few months ago, i spotted this cover and snatched it right up. i had never heard of the book, or of Marisa de los Santos

but the cover spoke to me. and it ended up being one of the best books i’ve read in a long time.

and i DO like the Vivannos. but i’ve only tried the chocolate banana one. and i loved it. (sorry…i know some of you hated it)

ps. if you ever need books to read, come stop by casa de martell. i have a full library of books for you. like this:

only, unlike the BEAST,  MY shelves are from IKEA.

8. i do pilates. the old school winsor pilates. and i have them on VHS tapes. my stepdad once bought them off of an infomercial and of course, since he’s not the getupandgo type either, i stole them. and i use them. on a mini-tv-vcr combo in our bedroom.

yes. the only exercise i do involves me, a small tv/vcr combo and certain Mari Winsor who makes me swear like a sailor as i’m trying to get my entire body up into the v-sit position, while she STANDS there, looking all smug. i do two 2-minute videos almost every day…the buns/thighs one and the ab sculpting one. LOVE.

10. my first cousin was the bass player in Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers. until he died, of a drug overdose. the last time i saw him was at his father’s – my uncle’s – funeral. the only thing i remember was that he was wearing leather pants.

it’s true. he is – erm, was – my first cousin. and he did wear leather pants to his dad’s funeral. classy, eh?

the lies:

2.  i have never smoked a cigarette in my life. ever.

while i firmly, strongly believe that fruit doesn’t belong in alcoholic drinks (with the exception of the margarita) or in cake, i have most certainly smoked cigarettes. i’m not, and haven’t even been, a smoker…but i did partake in the occasional social smoke.

3.  i am embarrassed to tell you how old i was when i realized that the underground railroad was never actually something that was underground. hint: it wasn’t that long ago.

while i can – sadly – fill out a blank map of the Americas (really, i can!) i most certainly and definitely knew what the underground railroad was. i’m an American. and a history geek. but recently, a friend confessed to not knowing…and then another and then another. it seems a lot of people thought it involved tunnels of sorts. and i promise i don’t judge. i mean, they DID call it ‘underground’ :)

4. i can touch the tip of my tongue to my nose. and curl my tongue in all sorts of fancy shapes, like the flower.

and while i can touch the tip of my tongue to my nose (it’s a really good party trick…really. i CAN even pick my nose with my tongue. ha! my sister can do it too! and my can Emily!)…i cannot do that swirly thing that sir Harry Potter can.

9. i have certain OCD tendencies that surface every once in a while. my kitchen cabinets are ridiculously neat. food products and boxes are arranged BY COLOR and size. if my nanny mistakenly puts things in the wrong place, i can’t leave for work in the morning until i’ve put the items back into the right places.

almost EVERYONE knew this one was a lie. my pantry? a bloody mess. my bathroom sinks? holyhell they are not lined up by anything but mess.

i am professor chaos.

you should see my car. holy shit…my car!

  1. I took ballet in the basement of a pharmacy.
    And I can do wicked tricks with my tongue, not the flower however.

    moosh in indy.s last blog post..they’re purely ornamental.


    Comment by moosh in indy. on July 28, 2008
  2. You always amuse me. These were fun things to learn about you – the true & the false.


    Comment by Britt on July 28, 2008
  3. I wish I had OCD. That way I could actually get some things done. This post was so much fun!

    kiridas last blog post..don’t tase me, mo


    Comment by kirida on July 28, 2008
  4. I want to know what that drink was! And from the look in your eyes, how your next morning was.

    I’ll remember to put the disposable cups out if you come over.

    threeundertwos last blog post..Bloggy Giveaway: Official Lit and Laundry Tote Bags


    Comment by threeundertwo on July 28, 2008
  5. Yes, you are a good internet liar! You think you know someone…and then your realize that it’s only the internet after all!

    Heathers last blog post..I’m Better than That!


    Comment by Heather on July 28, 2008
  6. hahaha! that was fun Ali.you crack me up sometimes


    Comment by LAVENDULA on July 28, 2008
  7. BOO. How did I miss this?? Oh, well. It was still fun to read. :)

    Also, they called them “goody boxes”?? Ew.

    metalias last blog post..Thoughts from the 10:30 pm Showing of THE DARK NIGHT, or: Why I am Not Yet Fit to Re-Enter Society, and Should’ve Just Stayed Home and Had Some Wine*


    Comment by metalia on July 28, 2008
  8. This is great! I think I’m going to steal the idea.

    Damn, OCD would make my house look so pretty.

    Nics last blog post..Whip It Up! Week Three Wrap-Up


    Comment by Nic on July 28, 2008
  9. I too judge books by their covers. and i guess people too.


    Comment by gorillabuns on July 28, 2008
  10. If you loved “Loved Walked In,” then you need to RUN to Indigo to get the sequel, “Belong to Me.” I loved it even more than the first one! Enjoy!


    Comment by FK on July 28, 2008
  11. Oh, dude. Don’t even get me started on the state of my minivan…

    Angellas last blog post..I Have Waited 645 Days For This Moment


    Comment by Angella on July 28, 2008
  12. You are too funny. My car was similar to what I imagine yours might be. Had to clean it out. I’m getting better gas mileage now.

    Misss last blog post..Shift


    Comment by Miss on July 28, 2008
  13. Dude, the picture of the margarita with the beer is making me weep a little.

    Issas last blog post..Baby countdown: Seven Weeks


    Comment by Issa on July 28, 2008
  14. I’m a winner! Whoo hoo. The one I guessed wrong was a real toss up.


    Comment by 180/360 on July 28, 2008
  15. This was HARD. I won’t tell you how long I hemmed and hawed before submitting my answers.


    Comment by mamatulip on July 28, 2008
  16. Okay, If I didn’t have that HORRIBLE headache, I would have WON this thing hands down. Oh well…. Sigh.


    Comment by Haley-O on July 28, 2008
  17. Love Walked In is one of my favorite books to come out in the past few years. There’s a sequel now as well. I need to get off my cheap/lazy/waiting for someone to type the whole thing into a blog post behind and buy it.


    Comment by Moose on July 28, 2008
  18. I judge most books by their cover. Intriguing or super pretty cover, and I will buy it. Of course, this also ends up in me being 5 chapters into a book and launching across the room, because I hate it.


    Comment by Shamelessly Sassy on July 28, 2008
  19. I WON! Freaking awesome.
    And I see that I mixed up the bass player/cigarette thing. Ah.

    Rebeccas last blog post..WAITWAITWAIT!


    Comment by Rebecca on July 28, 2008
  20. Maybe I should have spent the time I spent reading this to brush my teeth and then my teeth wouldn’t be rotting out of my head.


    slynnros last blog post..The Notebook.


    Comment by slynnro on July 28, 2008
  21. Chaos is fun at parties…
    disposable vessels only , of course.


    Comment by swirl girl on July 28, 2008
  22. Further justification we’re twins:

    -I bought Love Walked In based on the cover.
    -We both have famous kin…sort of. My mom dated Jimmy Buffett, does that count???
    -I can do all sorts of flowers and curly-cues with my tongue, too! And fold it over in half. Can you do that?
    -I keep at least TWO ponytail holders around my wrist at all time. Which is normally useful, until I show up at a black tie event and realize they don’t really go with my outfit.

    Though I never have smoked a cig and never will (just a decent amount of pot and hash; hey, I lived in Holland)…can we still be friends?

    Camels & Chocolates last blog post..Baffled by Banff


    Comment by Camels & Chocolate on July 29, 2008
  23. Wow, I feel like I don’t even know you. Actually, I thought they were all true!

    Kristabellas last blog post..The Fabulous Life Of Kristabella


    Comment by Kristabella on July 30, 2008
  24. I always have a hairband around my wrist too. I feel naked without it!


    Comment by Katie on July 31, 2008

Allowed tags: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <strike> <strong>