my stepmom is likely the world’s most friendly and outgoing person. she talks to everyone, everywhere. i remember when i was 12 and we were in myrtle beach. she walked right over to these two pre-teen hooligan types (i really just wanted to use the word hooligan, because, clearly, it’s not used enough), grabbed the cigarettes out of their mouths, and stamped them into the ground. she drives to the gas station to fill up her tank and comes home with an SUV filled with illegal mexicans to come and work on her lawn.
and, of course, she’s notorious for this…
(why, yes, that IS my stepmom and her expandable fork of doom, picking food off a random stranger’s plate!!)
i had always wished i could be like that. but i have always has issues talking to strangers. i have no idea why, actually. maybe it was fear of saying something stupid
and since you’ve all heard my “sweet the lick” story, you KNOW i say lots of stupid things
maybe i just didn’t like the small talk. but, ordering pizza, talking to customs agents, calling parents about playdates, talking to people for work…used to give me the sweats. heart palpitations. (that’s when we rely on my trusty old boyfriend…not this one, but this one)
but, recently, something in me has changed. (and it’s a myth when they tell you the only thing that changes when you turn 30 is the size of your hips. ahahah)
everywhere i go, i’m chatting up strangers. this woman in an elevator and i had a lengthy discussion about the state of affairs in the med-plaza parking lot! i swear. normally, i would just look up at the floor numbers going down. i talked to some random stranger in the hallway at work about sandals. just like that. no hives. no heart issues.
i went out last week and interviewed a celebrity. and it was normal. no sweats. nothing. AND I APPROACHED HIM. i downright asked him to let me interview him. Ali in her 20’s would never have done something like that.
my stepmom and i don’t share any blood…but it’s clear that her personality is rubbing off on me. so, if you see me walking around with a fork in hand…be afraid. be very afraid. because we know how much i like to talk to randoms now..and how much i like food..
(and sweet lord, if you don’t get this reference, get off your computer and download every. single. episode every made of 30 Rock. you won’t be sorry, i promise)
i think i’m going to like my 30s.
(i can’t believe i just said that)
34