May 4 08

 go on, take a gander at this.  

not sure what you are looking at? this, folks, is what the husband and i pulled out of our fridge yesterday. FOUR jars of duck sauce**. SEVEN jars of pickles. and ELEVEN containers of open mustard.

this is what happens when you can’t seem to fit your groceries into your 25.5 cubic foot fridge.

this is what happens when you have more than one child.

when you have one, you have time for things. you have time to clean out the fridge. and to get dressed in something other than yoga pants and a hoodie. you have time to get your hair cut and get your hoo-ha waxed and to go shopping. you have time to make sure that you have enough toilet paper. you have time to shower. you have time to check your fridge to make sure you don’t need mustard.

this is what Her Bad Mother, Mrs. Chicky, and Mrs. Chicken (and i’m also going to throw in Sam at Temporarily Me) - four lovely, lovely women who are about to have their SECOND babies, have to look forward to. a giant fridge with no room to store anything. (something else they have to look foward to…which only gets worse when you have three…is the constant getting of drinks. all the livelong day i, slave extraordinnaire, get drinks for my children. juice. water. chocolate milk.)

The Better then a Playdate and Cool Mom Picks ladies are behind this virtual baby shower. and they are looking for us to give some advice to the moms-for-the-second-time-to-be…

and the best piece of advice that i have for them, that i got from a good friend right before i gave birth to my second ankle-biter, was that it’s okay.

it’s okay to go out in the same outfit three days in a row. it’s okay to put your hair up in a clip because you don’t have time to dry your hair. and it’s okay to have a fridge full of pickles and mustard. it’s okay to have three-month old roots. it’s okay to stay inside when the thought of bundling two in snowsuits and strapping them into carseats gives you heart palpitations.

it’s okay to look like this the day you have your second…and it’s okay to actually show people (because they won’t judge you too harshly. that’s a note to you, readers, don’t judge me too harshly. and no need to tell me i look like i’m 12. i already know.)

(and ladies…come back to me when it’s time for #3…i’ll tell you all about the things that are okay to do when you have THREE little monsters running around. hahaha!)

(**note…there is NO duck in duck sauce. it’s a sweet-and-sour sauce (think: plum sauce) that my nanny uses in her Chinese food…and it’s a good dipping sauce for things like egg rolls and wontons….and i use it in some recipes for chicken. it’s AMAZING…you are going to have to trust me on this one.)

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  1. No fair making me laugh that hard. Now I have to change my pants.

    Love you.

    Mrs. Chicken’s last blog post..Because God Knows I Need All The Advice I Can Get

    Comment by Mrs. Chicken on May 4, 2008
  2. I looked at that photo, walked to the fridge, and grabbed a dill pickle before reading the rest of your post 🙂

    Angella’s last blog post..I Scream, You Scream

    Comment by Angella on May 4, 2008
  3. Mmmmmm… pickles…

    But seriously, I have always had two kids and I can truly back you up when you go grocery shopping that you can’t remember if you mayo or mustard or wine in a box so you buy another and another and another.

    And then one day you realize that life is just one cruel joke full of mustard and pickles.

    Matthew’s last blog post..Do you have “Blog Friends?”

    Comment by Matthew on May 4, 2008
  4. I only have ONE kid and I still had 3 bottles of Italian Dressing (from 2 years ago) that I had to throw out, 2 pickle jars, and two bottles of V8 that nobody drinks.

    Can’t wait for #2. I’m going to need 3 fridges.

    Backpacking Dad’s last blog post..The List

    Comment by Backpacking Dad on May 4, 2008
  5. OMG LOL!!! OH Ali, I love you!!

    Holy friggin mustard!!

    sam’s last blog post..What Could Honestly Be So Hard About Two?

    Comment by sam on May 4, 2008
  6. I’ll take some of those pickles off your hands. Yes, I am a cliche.

    thanks for the advice! yes, it is okay.

    Chicky Chicky Baby’s last blog post..Cue the synthesizer, it’s The Final Countdown

    Comment by Chicky Chicky Baby on May 4, 2008
  7. Duck sauce?? Wha?!?

    Comment by Britt on May 4, 2008
  8. Do you have a walk-in fridge of some kind? Because I have no idea how you can possibly fit that many condiments in anything smaller than a walk-in fridge!

    Shannon’s last blog post..peevish

    Comment by Shannon on May 4, 2008
  9. DUCK SAUCE? WTF???
    You look so cute in that picture! 🙂

    Haley-O’s last blog post..Productive? Me!

    Comment by Haley-O on May 4, 2008
  10. Did you have any room for anything else?

    What the heck is duck sauce?!

    Teena in Toronto’s last blog post..The kids today

    Comment by Teena in Toronto on May 4, 2008
  11. The terrifying thing is that is like my fridge. The mustard definitely, but switch the duck sauce for mayonnaise and the pickles for beetroot and open cheese.

    But I have 3 kids, 4 if you count my husband, so I am sure I am excused.

    Kelley’s last blog post..Take me drinking with you. I mean, to BlogHer.

    Comment by Kelley on May 5, 2008
  12. The perfect mother’s day post!

    Di’s last blog post..The first step is…

    Comment by Di on May 5, 2008
  13. WOW! That is INSANE!!!
    You and I must be on the same wave length because I also cleaned out my fridge on Friday, but didn’t find anything nearly as exciting or funny as you!
    I guess I’m getting ready for Baby #2 early–making room!!!

    Multi-Tasking Mommy’s last blog post..Another dentist trip!

    Comment by Multi-Tasking Mommy on May 5, 2008
  14. I do the same thing with olives. =D

    heather’s last blog post..Mommy Is Not A Happy Camper

    Comment by heather on May 5, 2008
  15. i have one kid and i am a condiment junkie. our fridge door looks the same. more salad dressings than mustard though.

    now as one who is seriously contemplating the addition of a 2nd, i was glad to read your thoughts. i hope to hear more from those moms once the second comes. maybe that is when i will decide.

    tracey’s last blog post..sailing takes me away to where i’m going

    Comment by tracey on May 5, 2008
  16. We don’t have kids, but when we lived with my mother in law, SOMEHOW we ended up with TWELVE BOTTLES OF MAYONNAISE.

    Maryann’s last blog post..Icon Gallery Up!!

    Comment by Maryann on May 5, 2008
  17. That’s what my fridge looks like and I just have the one kid, but a crazy penchant for condiments. I recently discovered miniature bottles of condiments..not for their easy storage, but more for my sick obsession with all things miniature. I’ll flickr them soon.

    Amanda’s last blog post..And Then, We Ran Like Hell

    Comment by Amanda on May 5, 2008
  18. Thanks for clearing up the Duck sauce questions that were coming out of my mouth as I read about it…as the proud owner of about thirteen different kinds of Asian cooking sauces, I was a little surprised (and a bit creeped out) that I hadn’t heard of it. It’s now on my next list of things to pick up at the supermarket… but I’ll have to make room for it on the fridge door first by getting rid of one of our own FOUR mustard bottles.

    jasmine’s last blog post..lazy sunday

    Comment by jasmine on May 5, 2008
  19. I could practically DRINK duck sauce…
    Ah, mustard. I see that you also are a fan of buying mustard. The door shelves in our fridge are FULL of condiments. It’s a sad state.

    Rebecca’s last blog post..Hellooooo there!

    Comment by Rebecca on May 5, 2008
  20. Do most people NOT know about Duck Sauce! That’s terrible! (The fact that people don’t know about it, the sauce is fabulous!)

    Amazing what’s acceptable once you have more than one kid.

    Jennifer’s last blog post..Mother’s Day Gift Guide

    Comment by Jennifer on May 5, 2008
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  22. Oh my. I guess it’s a good thing I don’t like mustard.

    Miss Grace’s last blog post..Books I’ve read in the past month, with short reviews

    Comment by Miss Grace on May 5, 2008
  23. I got so annoyed when my smug “moms of more than one” friends would lecture me about how different life is after baby number one is not the only baby. Cause I had my shit together. I would be as fabulous after as I was before.

    Shyeah. Righ.

    Seriously. The second one is easier. MUCH easier. You’re such a pro by that point that you can change diapers with one hand while searching for Spongebob on TV with the other.

    The fourth though? THAT one is the nail in the coffin. 🙂

    Chantal’s last blog post..The downside of being the perfect kid

    Comment by Chantal on May 5, 2008
  24. when I had my second at a teaching hospital, the doctor wanted to know if some new 1st year residents could watch…I was like, are you kidding? You could have a circus in the corner and I wouldn’t care…raise your hand if you HAVEN’T seen my who-ha!?!
    Love the pic…you are adorable!…so are the kids…

    Comment by jodi on May 5, 2008
  25. aaaw… so so busy!!
    i was always planning to have 4 children.. but i think i’ll have to wait & see and have one at a time. i already have 3 month old roots, but thats from lack of $$ from being a student. i know.. not really an excuse!
    duck sauce sounds yum!

    Bronnie’s last blog post..Macro Monday: jewel

    Comment by Bronnie on May 5, 2008
  26. OK, I admit I had never heard of duck sauce until just now. I’m very curious…so I’m adding it to my grocery list. Where exactly would this item be located?? I’m awful with grocery stores & finding stuff.

    FENICLE’s last blog post..Two Coats Later

    Comment by FENICLE on May 5, 2008
  27. I WAS going to ask what Duck Sauce was, but you beat me to it..

    nomotherearth’s last blog post..Two Timing

    Comment by nomotherearth on May 5, 2008
  28. LOL – we had so many condiments in our fridge that we went and bought a new one – then cleaned out the old one and realized we had 15 kinds of salad dressings, only we haven’t had salad in two years…
    Visit me @ http://www.momontherun.net

    Mom On The Run’s last blog post..About Mom On The Run:

    Comment by Mom On The Run on May 5, 2008
  29. You looked FABULOUS in that post-birth photo missy! Jeez 🙂 Umm, that’s a LOT of mustard.

    Huckdoll’s last blog post..Seven Deadly Sins

    Comment by Huckdoll on May 6, 2008
  30. Glad there’s no duck in that duck sauce…
    isn’t that the rule, though, each person in their household gets their own bottle of mustard ??!!
    Love that shot of you and your babies … you look fantastic!

    Karen MEG’s last blog post..I wanna be Madonna

    Comment by Karen MEG on May 6, 2008
  31. Sounds like good advice to me!

    Kristabella’s last blog post..Good Times Guaranteed

    Comment by Kristabella on May 6, 2008
  32. Clearly those are all necessary condiments, as you never know which type of mustard will compliment your ham today 🙂
    Just kidding. My fridge is the same.

    Mrs. Mustard’s last blog post..I’m so cool, I just had to do it

    Comment by Mrs. Mustard on May 7, 2008
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