November 7 06

i’m not going to complain about the fact that i had to leave early this morning to go and pick up the civic at the honda dealer.

i’m not going to complain about the fact that doing this caused me to be late for work. and i hate to be late.

i’m not going to complain about the fact that i had to fill up the van yesterday and the civic this morning.

and i’m not even going to complain about the fact that i had to sing dora songs over and over and over and over while we waited for daddy (“where dadda go??”) to come out of the dealership.

what i AM going to complain about is my wet ass. i can not sit on a toilet seat in my house without sitting on someone’s pee. There really is not a worse feeling. (well…guess if you sit on a public toilet seat and get some stranger’s pee on your ass…but, you see, i don’t sit on public toilet seats.)

i should be able to sit on a toilet in my own home.

there are two people to blame here. the husband and the boy. neither one will lift the seat. and clearly neither one has this right anymore (with the boy it’s his aim that’s the problem, and with the husband, it’s the splash-back. i don’t freakin’ care what it is…i’m tired of having a wet ass). yes, i understand. the boy is lazy and the husband doesn’t want to touch the toilet seat. but, let me tell you what, i’d rather touch a toilet seat than sit on pee.

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  1. Just when you thought it couldn’t get any grosser…my best friend was sitting around with her three grown brothers and her husband and the topic of “peeing in the sink” came up. And apparently all of them said, “Yeah, we did that.” Amy incredulously said, “But when we were growing up, there were two bathrooms!” to which one brother responded, “Yeah, but if the downstairs one was in use I didn’t want to have to walk all the way upstairs!”

    And she thought that was just a problem in her family until I actually found and sent her a greeting card which showed a sink drain and said “99% of men have peed in the sink.”
    Open it up?
    “1% missed”

    Yuck!!!! Just what I need to go with the excessive phlegm in my head!!!

    Di

    [Reply]

    Comment by Di on November 7, 2006
  2. I could have written that myself.
    I have a hard enough time going potty with my 7.5 mos pregnant belly in the way. Not only is wiping myself difficult these days, but now I’m trying to wipe the boy-driddle off my thighs and ass cheeks from Sean and Cam. Can’t wait for Cuy to be toilet trained, but that’ll mean 3 boys pissing on MY seat. Imagine if I have another boy? Cripes…

    [Reply]

    Comment by Christine on November 7, 2006
  3. OK, maybe I’m strange about this, but why can’t they lift the toilet seat in their own home? I can half understand the public bathroom phobia (but a good sized roll of t.p. can protect you with that) but in my own house? I lift the seat AND put it back down when I’m done. And as for “splash back” (on the edges of the bowl)? I wipe that with the t.p. too! How complicated is that?

    Sorry… just don’t understand.

    [Reply]

    Comment by Jeff on November 7, 2006
  4. Just remember you are raising another person’s future partner. Please don’t let him be lazy about lifting the seat. Just think, you’ll be saving someone else the absolute disgusting feeling of sitting in someone elses dribble!

    [Reply]

    Comment by susan on November 7, 2006
  5. Oh, I so hear ya, sista!! I live with a multitude of testosterone charged ?humans?. I can say I too have felt that sinking feeling in the pit of my gut as I sat down to realize…..ugh.

    [Reply]

    Comment by Iris/Rissy on November 7, 2006
  6. I think it’s perfectly acceptable to complain about a wet ass. Can’t blame you a bit.

    [Reply]

    Comment by Chris on November 7, 2006
  7. I’m glad to say that my three boys (including the hubbie) are well trained in putting the seat up and down after potty. So my girl and I are all set. But that’s a yucky feeling though. And no, I never sit in public toilets either.

    [Reply]

    Comment by Waya on November 7, 2006
  8. Forget the seat…I don’t like stepping in little piddle puddles on the FLOOR.

    Have you thought about installing one of those toilet seat cover contraptions in your bathroom? Kind of industrial, but gets the job done. ;)

    [Reply]

    Comment by Stacy on November 7, 2006
  9. Oh my…I grew up with two brothers – I feel your pain!

    [Reply]

    Comment by Colleen on November 7, 2006
  10. I. Hate. that. Hate it! I tell my boyfriend to WIPE IT UP. But he acts stupid and I end up having to remember to check the seat before I sit- which isn’t very feasible when I’ve just gotten up or it’s 3 am….

    [Reply]

    Comment by Kristen on November 7, 2006
  11. So glad I’m not the only one. There is nothing worse than sitting in pee… NASTY. my husband doesn’t do it but my stepson does. he insists that he puts the seat up, but I don’t believe him for one second. It’s like he TRIES to pee all over the place!

    [Reply]

    Comment by jenni on November 7, 2006
  12. I have to back up my hubby (Jeff)on this one :) He is atypical, I know, when it comes to this matter. Don’t know if it is because he knows it grosses me out OR if because he lived on his own for so long and didn’t want to clean that often OR if it is just because he is an amazing husband who respects the fact that it completely grosses women out! As for your son, he will learn eventually, MAYBE! I do think that if it grosses you out that much that you need to find something to do that would gross him (your husband)out equally….I won’t be so bold as to suggest what, but what if there was something that he would get grossed out so much to the point where he would agree to make an effort to change his manly washroom habits???? Hmmm…..

    [Reply]

    Comment by Amanda on November 7, 2006
  13. No wet toilet seat in a while but I can totally relate to Stacy…the puddles and splash on the floor! I use my anti-bacterial wipes daily and still suffer through them. Yuck.

    [Reply]

    Comment by Jen on November 7, 2006
  14. I have 2 boys and a husband…say no more, yes totally gross..and a dog who poos in the house sometimes! yuck..

    [Reply]

    Comment by Heidi on November 7, 2006
  15. I feel your pain. No, literally. Every time I sit down on the toilet. Life with men.

    [Reply]

    Comment by Michelle on November 7, 2006
  16. Send ‘em all to mah house – I’ll train ‘em for ya!

    Also, I wish Di hadn’t said that. UGH.

    [Reply]

    Comment by Karen Rani on November 7, 2006
  17. Great post!!! I can TOTALLY relate. I sit on pee all. the. time. Josh laughs. Bitches.

    [Reply]

    Comment by haley-o on November 8, 2006
  18. THAT is just too funny. We were getting ready for bed last night after watching Gilmour Girls. Our son had gotten up 20 minutes earlier, stumbled into the bathroom to pee, and went back to bed. So I go upstairs to use the bathroom. What do I find? A WET SEAT! Not only was it wet, but the floor all around the toilet was also wet. This is what happens when little boys pee when they are half asleep! UGH!!! I have actually become pretty good at looking before sitting.

    [Reply]

    Comment by Jay on November 8, 2006
  19. Oh the wet but. So gross. I wrote about this recently. My son is a seat pee-er and it makes me crazy!!

    [Reply]

    Comment by Sunshine Scribe on November 8, 2006
  20. Okay, yet another reason I am teaching my son to pee sitting down. Until he is old enough to deal with the seat, that’s my solution. Not that he is anywhere near potty trained…no…he’s afraid of the potty…

    [Reply]

    Comment by Urban Mummy on November 8, 2006
  21. I found your relevant post from a comment the lovely Di left on one of mine: addressing the same thing about boys and potties. In the elementary school. Oh, and privates hanging out long before it is necessary to use them.

    Your post reminds me of the time my brother put Vaseline on the seat of our mutual bathroom when I was a girl. Not only did I slip when I sat, I slipped up to my knees INSIDE the toilet. Ha.Ha.Ha. Be glad you were just a little wet. ;)

    [Reply]

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