i should have known that when i opened up the floor for questioning, that someone would ask this.
Quid pro quo.
WhatÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s your most embarrassing story that youÃ¢â‚¬â„¢re willing to share?
it’s my own fault.Ã‚Â i asked him the VERY same question. embarrassment and i are like peas and carrots. best friends. Two stories in particular stick out in my mind, mostly because they are legendary ali-makes-an-ass-out-of-herself stories.
story #1: Ali and friends are sitting around watching The Karate Kid. (shut up, you know you love it too) Now, if you’ve ever watched a movie with me, you know that it is difficult for me NOT to mouth along every. single. word. i have a strange, strange brain that can’t remember that i was supposed to get milk after work, but can remember every single line to every single movie i have ever seen.
so…close to the end, i turn to the husband and say, all innocently, “Sweet the lick? is that some sort of weird karate move? that line never made any sense to me. why does he tell him to sweet the lick?”
Mike, in hysterics, turns to me and says, “it’s sweep. the. leg. he’s telling him to sweep his leg. to cheat.”
me = red face.
story #2: when we first became friends with Jack and Ilana, they graciously invited us over to their house. and i graciously stuck my ass through one of their wicker chairs. no, i’m not kidding. i barely knew them, i got up to reach something, and when i sat back down, i went ass first straight into the back of their chair.
they have since gotten new dining room chairs. and have still not gotten rid of me…so i didn’t make that horrible of an impression. they do enjoy telling the story to people, however.
which story is worse?
i didn’t know that someone was going to ask me what my favorite cheese was…
What is your favorite cheese?
i am a cheeselover. because i am a cheesehead.
i think, though, that my favorite has got to be an Irish cheddar. because it’s marbled with Guinness Beer. and cheese and beer together = awesome.
What is your:
Most irrational fear?Ã‚Â
this one is easy. it’s vomit. and i know it’s irrational. but it’s a fear nonetheless. a fear that makes me incapable of proper parenting when my children are sick. a fear that makes me think every cough during the night is a child vomiting. a fear that makes me nervous anytime anyone says their stomach hurts. a fear that makes me nervous to go on buses. or boats. it’s called Emetophobia.
Franny and Zooey by JD Salinger.
white chocolate reese’s peanut butter cups. yum.
but i like lots of candy. mmm…candy. i like sour candy. and twizzlers. and gummy candy. mmm…
i also would like to get my hands on an everlasting gobstopper. because “You can suck ’em and suck ’em and suck ’em, and they’ll never get any smaller.” awe. some.
**please note. this title has nothing really nothing to do with the content you have just read, it’s just one of my favorite movie quotes ever. anyone know the response to this? anyone?
come back tomorrow for some more good times with ali. dy-no-mite!Ã‚Â